Cocaine / Crack

It’s hard out here for an immigrant. Arizona has immigrants in the crosshairs, as we all know. Immigrants might also be unable to clerk for federal judges (or at least get paid for it). And when they commit crimes and get sentenced, immigrants are sometimes subjected to snide remarks by judges. The Seventh Circuit recently […]

As you’ve probably heard, last week Las Vegas cops arrested partying hag Paris Hilton for cocaine possession, after pulling her over in a Cadillac Escalade that was trailing marijuana smoke. And as you’ve probably also heard, the police would have never found the coke in the first place if Paris hadn’t been such a vain […]

Congratulations to Akin Gump, winner of Above the Law’s inaugural holiday card contest. Check out their very funny and clever card over here. The voting wasn’t even close. There were seven entrants, but Akin walked away with over 44 percent of the vote. It was the commenters’ favorite, too: “I work at HayBoo [Haynes and […]

Back in the eighties, the popular myth was that all Manhattan attorneys had a leather briefcase, a good blue pen, and a Scarface-sized bowl of cocaine on their desk. Sadly, by the time I got to Biglaw the briefcase had been replaced by a canvas bag with a gaudy firm emblem emblazoned on the side […]