Jones Day

* Michael Cohen’s lawyers are doubling down on their effort to get a gag order against Michael Avenatti. Meanwhile, Cohen gave an interview to Good Morning America, an irony not lost on Avenatti. [Courthouse News Service]

* After the Supreme Court gutted public sector unions, the cheerleaders of Alito’s judicial activism may end up getting more than they bargained for. Some believe that, stripped of funds to negotiate a contract at the table, unions may increasingly jump right to the picket line. [National Law Journal]

* The sad tale of Stan Lee’s finances apparently has folks lawyering up. [USA Today]

* Jones Day’s gender discrimination suit puts a new spotlight on its notorious black box compensation model. Will the firm come clean about how it pays people, or will it be dragged into discovery? [American Lawyer]

* The top appellate attorney for the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, an entity devoted to whittling down the rights of consumers to pursue meaningful legal action against businesses, has left the group to join a plaintiffs’ side firm. Ahahahahahahahaha. [National Law Journal]

* Michigan State is fighting hard to keep the advice of its in-house attorneys privileged. The state has some concern that potential criminal activity could’ve been shielded by having a lawyer in the room, which given the scope of the cover-up revealed so far is not entirely unreasonable. [Corporate Counsel]

* We’ve given the NLJ 500 a lot of flack over the years, but the ranking does give us insight into which markets are in growth mode. This year, that’s Portland, Oregon. Tell that to Perkins Coie. [Law.com]

* A full 85 percent of companies aren’t ready for the GDPR implementation deadline later this week, meaning… well probably nothing, but let’s freak out about it anyway. [Corporate Counsel]

* Jones Day’s Dana Baiocco tabbed by Trump administration to the Consumer Product Safety Commission to end Democratic leadership on that board. So get ready for exploding bottles and nails just sticking out of stuffed animals… because “freedom.” [National Law Journal]

* DOJ tests new investigative tactic of just telling suspected criminals everything before interviewing them. [Huffington Post]

* We’re deregulating banks again because that’s historically worked out so well. [Wall Street Journal]

* South Carolina has repealed its “disturbing school” law, which was really just a vague catch-all provision to allow cops to harass and imprison black kids. [ACLU]

* Paul Manafort looks to suppress more evidence. Hey it’s worth a shot. [Courthouse News Service]

* In sad news, groundbreaking attorney Dovey Johnson Roundtree has passed away at 104. [Washington Post]

* The long, drawn out saga of the “Monkey Selfie” case has crossed another milestone with the Ninth Circuit ruling that the monkey can’t sue for copyright violations. Reached for comment, the monkey’s attorney expressed disappointment in the decision and hurled feces. [Courthouse News Service]

* Jones Day loses more partners to the lateral market. We assume they saw the Above the Law Law Firm Rankings and decided they had to get out. [American Lawyer]

* Colorado passes “secret prisons” reform bill… in secret. Hurray irony! [9News]

* Kimberly Yuracko named the new dean of Northwestern Law. [Northwestern University NewsCenter]

* Good news for DLA Piper: the Second Circuit upholds their malpractice victory. [Law360]

* K&L Gates adds firepower in Asia. That should serve them well until Trump hears a scary Pokemon Go story on Fox and cuts off all trade to Japan. [International]

* Checking in on the finale of the Global Legal Hackathon. So if you got a suspicious request for money from your practice management software the other day, it was probably hacked. [Legaltech News]

* The Supreme Court heard argument in Janus yesterday and, well, labor rights were fun while they lasted! [National Law Journal]

* Marvin Washington’s pot decriminalization suit dismissed, continuing the Jets losing streak. [Law360]

* The explosion of Emoji keyboards presents a problem for eDiscovery. So bust out those Rick & Morty stickers if you want to keep your insider trading habits from prying eyes. [Legaltech News]

* How does a receiver deal with Bitcoin? How can currency with no “home” be seized? A Jones Day partner is figuring that out. [The Recorder]

* Supreme Court debates whether or not Amex can prevent merchants from offering incentives to keep people from using their Amex card. So if it gets more difficult to use your corporate card, blame the justices. [Courthouse News Service]

* The head of legal relationship management for Barclays discusses the bank’s model for dealing with outside counsel. [Big Law Business]

* Trump tabs Skadden partner Michael Scudder for Seventh Circuit seat. Here’s some quotes from James Comey praising Scudder, so we know the Deep State must be happy. [National Law Journal]

* Yes, it’s accurate to say that the specific job of sheriff has an “Anglo-American heritage.” And, yes, given that it’s entirely unnecessary to do so — when terms like “common law” exist — the fact that someone would use that phrasing is indicative of racial bias. In fact, if anyone drops “heritage” when talking about white people it’s probably a bad sign. [Washington Post]

* All 56 Attorneys General are asking Congress to end forced arbitration in sexual harassment cases. Florida’s Pam Bondi stepped out of her usual ethical cloud to say, “decades of private arbitration proceedings regarding sexual harassment have had the unintended consequence of protecting serial violators.” You can go ahead and delete “regarding sexual harassment” and only improve the accuracy there. [Daily Business Review]

* DLA Piper has a new senior partner, which I believe grants him the official title of “Pied Piper.” [International]

* ABA looking to make online education easier. [Inside Higher Ed]

* Jones Day continues to have the top law firm brand according to the annual Acritas survey of clients. [American Lawyer]

* One of the tourists killed in the Grand Canyon helicopter crash this weekend was a lawyer. [American Lawyer]

* Sitting en banc, the Seventh Circuit reinstated the conviction of Making a Murderer’s Brendan Dassey in a split decision. If you recall, Dassey’s conviction was overturned by a federal magistrate in June 2016, and that ruling was later affirmed by a three-judge panel of the Seventh Circuit this June. [ABA Journal]

* Dean Blake Morant says GW Law enrolled a smaller incoming class this fall in order to stop its downward slide in the U.S. News rankings. Because of the smaller class, some programs are being cut and there’s a freeze on staff hiring. Yikes. [GW Hatchet]

* What is special counsel Robert Mueller’s legal endgame in this Russia probe? Some think that this could turn into an obstruction of justice case, while others think this could turn into a conspiracy case. What’ll it be? This investigation has no end in sight, so we’ll have to wait a bit longer to find out. [NPR]

* Kevin McIntyre, the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission’s new chairman, has given us a little $1.8 million peek into the Jones Day black box in his financial disclosure. [National Law Journal]

* The legal profession had something to be thankful for this November: according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the legal sector grew by 600 jobs. [American Lawyer]

* “On the surface it looks like you covered this up,” is never the most encouraging message to hear from the federal judge on your case. [The Recorder]

* Jeffrey Wertkin, the former Akin Gump partner who sold whistleblower complaints to targeted companies, pleaded guilty. [Reuters]

* Juror dismissed from FIFA corruption trial for falling asleep, proving a trial about soccer is just as thrilling as a game of soccer. [Law360]

* The highest paid GCs in America. [Corporate Counsel]

* Jones Day continues its drive to scoop up SCOTUS clerks by the bushel. [American Lawyer]

* Neal Katyal has passed Thurgood Marshall as the minority lawyer with the most Supreme Court arguments. [Litigation Daily]

* It looks like justices from both ends of the philosophical spectrum will come together to rule that the DOJ still needs to get warrants. Glad we can all come together to agree on this very, very low bar. [National Law Journal]