Non-Sequiturs

  • Kim_Jong-Un_Sketch

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.24.14

    * The joke’s on North Korea: you can’t hack the D.C. Circuit because they still use Commodore 64s. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

    * As we remember the Slaughter and May holiday party of 1981, here’s a mashup with contemporary music. [Legal Cheek]

    * With restrictions lifting, what will America’s new relationship with Cuba mean for business? I’m most looking forward to imported communist liquor. They can call it Red Rum. [LXBN]

    * Court says Muslim can’t take the oath on a Koran. I mean, isn’t this that special time of year where people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ? [Religion Clause]

    * The least efficient armed robbery ever nets pennies. If one of these guys drops a dime on the others guys he’d actually be coming out ahead. [Legal Juice]

    * Christmas wishes revolving mostly around Agent Carter and Star Wars. My only Star Wars wish is for a stand-alone Admiral Ackbar movie, but we’re not going to get it. [The Legal Geeks]

    13 Comments / / Dec 24, 2014 at 1:31 PM
  • Festivus_Pole

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.23.14

    * Today is Festivus. For the rest of us. [PrawfsBlawg]

    * “Law Schools Shouldn’t Despair: If History Is Any Guide, the Legal Profession Will Be in Vogue Again Before Too Long.” It’ll be a Festivus miracle. [TaxProf Blog]

    * CNN lawyers and Cosby lawyers are sniping at each other and it’s getting ugly. They all need a nice Rohypnol-flavored Jell-O pudding pop to calm down. [Maynard Institute]

    * Should law clerks betray their bosses? The ethical dilemma of Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link). [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

    * Toy guns… not so much a holiday staple these days. [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

    * Stephen Colbert’s lawyer, Trevor Potter, talks about life after the Report. [Legal Times]

    * Mark your calendars: Court to decide if it’ll hear marriage equality cases on January 9. [BuzzFeed]

    * If you’re looking for fashion advice and one-stop shopping, Corporette just compiled her favorite posts of 2014. [Corporette]

    11 Comments / / Dec 23, 2014 at 3:46 PM
  • 01-stick-em-up-kitty-kitten-cat-gun-e1286641024121

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.22.14

    * “Pay up or the cat gets it!” is an entirely acceptable means of collecting judgments in Russia. Because of course it is. [Lowering the Bar]

    * Conservative Teresa Wagner, the professor who sued the University of Iowa for discrimination, is now irked that she’s been relegated to the library pending retrial. [TaxProf Blog]

    * Mayonnaise manufacturer has dropped its stupid lawsuit over the definition of “mayonnaise.” Litigation dollars well spent. [Slate]

    * A new company, “Assholes on Demand,” threatens to undercut the primary service lawyers provide. [The Irreverent Lawyer]

    * North Korea hacks finally hit trend-chasing lawyers where it hurts. [Twitter]

    * The California bar exam pass rate took a big hit. But big shifts in bar passage are not new in California historically. [Bar Exam Stats]

    * Number crunchers conclude that in the UK, people hire expensive lawyers more than successful lawyers. [Legal Futures]

    2 Comments / / Dec 22, 2014 at 5:35 PM
  • holiday-gifts-support-staff-paralegals-secretaries-260x172

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.19.14

    * Still looking for a great gift for your assistant? Corporette presents their annual secretary gift guide! [Corporette]

    * Marijuana law may be hot, but marijuana legalization may be in hot water: Oklahoma and Nebraska take their case to the Supreme Court that Colorado’s law is damaging them. [The Denver Post]

    * Associates are super excited about their shiny — but discretionary — bonuses. Note that base pay hasn’t taken a similar leap. Thanks for throwing a wet blanket on the season. [Law and More]

    * Who are the new lawyers in Congress? Mike Sacks profiles them. [National Law Journal]

    * The law firm trying to kill the internet is Jenner & Block. That’s unfair — the law firm employed by people trying to kill the internet is Jenner & Block. And they’re willing to write a whole letter and make a state Attorney General just sign it! That’s some pull. [The Verge]

    * At this special time of year, let’s remember who this season is all about: pagans. [What About Clients?]

    * U.S. District Judge Algenon L. Marbley just resigned to settle an ethics probe. Not as a federal judge of course, but as a trustee to THE Ohio State University. The Ohio Ethics Commission raised issues with Judge Marbley serving as a trustee while simultaneously teaching as an adjunct at the law school. [Columbus Dispatch]

    * Brad and Da Boyz with a nice little ditty about copyright infringement and fair use. [YouTube]

    10 Comments / / Dec 19, 2014 at 5:03 PM
  • lightsaber

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.18.14

    * 3D printing and lightsabers and intellectual property. [Concurring Opinions]

    * Speaking of IP law, let’s talk Santa Claus and intellectual property. [Trademark & Copyright Law Blog / Foley Hoag LLP]

    * “ExamExtensionGate” stirs up conservatives, but also a lot of liberal to moderate Boomers, because… “Lazy Millennials!” Forgetting of course that law students in the 1960s did the exact same thing. But those were mostly white kids talking about Vietnam, so it’s like… different, man. [PrawfsBlawg]

    * If you’re excited to hear this year’s annual report on the federal judiciary and can’t hardly wait until Chief Justice Roberts unleashes it upon the world, perhaps you can sate your appetite with this prebuttal. [Fix the Court]

    * The Texas judge who kicked a lawyer out of court for thoughtlessly appearing with a broken leg has earned the ire of the Dallas legal community. [Legal Juice]

    * More than 70 years later, a judge concludes that South Carolina shouldn’t have executed a 14-year-old based on a one-day trial. Took ya long enough. [WTOP]

    * Interesting academic piece on Muslims in the Antebellum South. In other news, there were Muslims in the Antebellum South. [The Faculty Lounge]

    5 Comments / / Dec 18, 2014 at 5:40 PM
  • 640px-Viagra_in_Pack

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.16.14

    * Law firm suffers Viagra hack. If it persists for more than four hours… [Legal Cheek]

    * An in-depth and frightening look at “Witness 40″ in the Ferguson Grand Jury proceedings: a bipolar woman with a long history of making racist comments who lived nowhere near Ferguson and testified only after Officer Wilson’s story was revealed — which she parroted back. Bob McCulloch thought this was a stellar witness. Bob McCulloch is also bad at his job. [The Smoking Gun]

    * Charleston local government wants InfiLaw out of town. Is there anyone left who wants InfiLaw to take over Charleston? [TaxProf Blog]

    * Congratulations to U.S. Attorney Sarah Saldaña on her confirmation as head of ICE. [International Business Times]

    * Pet piercing will soon be illegal in New York, so get that dope nose ring for your dog today! [Lowering the Bar]

    * Canadian “band” Skinny Puppy demands $660,000 from the U.S. government for using their music as torture material without permission. As a compromise can we just pledge to strap Dick Cheney down and force him to listen to 15 consecutive hours of Skinny Puppy and call it a day? [Gawker]

    * Cleveland WR Andrew Hawkins pens a thorough, even-handed takedown of butthurt police union leaders demanding he apologize for taking the stance that police should try not to kill unarmed 12-year-olds. So apparently this is what the Browns are good at. [Talking Points Memo]

    * David chats about the backstory behind Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link).

    20 Comments / / Dec 16, 2014 at 5:28 PM
  • 220px-Tori_Spelling_at_The_Heart_Truth_2009

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.15.14

    * Allegations abound that Tori Spelling’s signature was forged on a bunch of settlement documents. But she says it’s hers. What wacky adventures will Donna Martin get into next? [National Enquirer]

    * A reminder to send in those holiday card contest submissions by Wednesday! We’ve seen some fun ones so far, but don’t let your firm be left out. [Above the Law]

    * The 11th Circuit’s ECF system appears to be infected with a virus. Crackerjack technology work there. [South Florida Lawyers]

    * Nothing really new here, but it’s a very specific, personal account of the broken law school model. [The Gazette (Cedar Rapids)]

    * Meanwhile, Dean Daniel Hamilton of UNLV Law joins the chorus of deans pitching the “because everyone’s figured out law school’s a bad deal it’s suddenly become a good deal.” [Vegas Seven]

    * Aaron Sorkin stands up for his Hollywood buddies and that means he’s fig leafing rampant racism and sexism. [Redline]

    * Former SF mayor Willie Brown is confused by the nomination of Leondra Kruger to the California Supreme Court because she lives in D.C. He asks whether “there [were] no qualified African Americans in California?” Perhaps, but as a former SCOTUS clerk, Chicago Law instructor, U.S. deputy assistant attorney general, and assistant to the solicitor general there are few more qualified people anywhere for this job. [SF Gate]

    * There’s been a void in all our hearts since we lost the genius UChiLawGo Tumblr. Hopefully its intellectual successor can fill that void. [UChiLawls]

    15 Comments / / Dec 15, 2014 at 5:02 PM
  • Tyra Banks RF

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.12.14

    * An “America’s Next Top Model” contestant sued Tyra Banks, claiming she was disqualified from the title because Banks found out she had worked as an escort. You’re looking for people who can walk back and forth in heels over and over. Who did you think was trying out for the show? [Courthouse News Service]

    * Dewey know which DLA Piper department head just declared personal bankruptcy? [New York Times]

    * Coming soon to the hipster haven near you: the artisanal attorney. Hilarious satirical piece by John Frank Weaver. [McSweeney’s]

    * Are you getting married? Are you planning to change your name? Huge mistake. The name part at least. Maybe the married part, I don’t know your deal. [The American Lawyer]

    * The Onion surveys the reaction to the Columbia Law exam policy. [The Onion]

    * You can’t force welfare recipients to get drug tests. Which was kind of obvious but still required a court to weigh in. [Pathologyblawg]

    * A New York judge allegedly stroked his secretary’s face, forced her to give him hugs, and regaled her with explicit tales of sex with his mistress. [New York Post]

    * There’s a wealth of information in this post about the ABA 509 Information Reports. Keith Lee does a year-over-year comparison of the top ten and bottom ten schools, looking for trends. [Associate’s Mind]

    * A BC government official has revoked approval of a law school based upon a pledge to discriminate against “the gays.” [Trinity Western University]

    9 Comments / / Dec 12, 2014 at 5:03 PM
  • lottery

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.11.14

    * A registered sex offender wins the lottery. $3 million buys a lot of windowless vans. [Orlando Sentinel]

    * Judge to federal prosecutor: “You’re branded as a liar and you’ll remain a liar for the rest of your life.” [New York Observer]

    * A New York lawyer has been arrested and charged with running down 5 people in Herald Square. Alcohol and crack pipes are involved. And topless selfies. Look, you’re going to see more on this from Staci in the morning, so just sit tight. [Inquisitr]

    * If you want to live in a mansion, all you need to do is forge a few documents. [Gawker]

    * The Supreme Court of Canada says cops can search your phone when they arrest you. But only to check the Habs score. [Ars Technica]

    * Another installment of Posner on Posner. This time focusing on the First Amendment. [Concurring Opinions]

    * This week we learned there’s a thing called “rectal feeding.” Professor Michael Dorf on why it’s totally a war crime. [Dorf on Law]

    * How many law schools will close by 2020? [TaxProf Blog]

    * Want to be on the LSAC Board of Trustees? It’s not like they have any glaring problems that require a leadership change. [LSAC]

    33 Comments / / Dec 11, 2014 at 5:04 PM
  • 1024px-Flag_of_Alaska.svg

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.10.14

    * An Assistant DA in Barrow, Alaska, was shot and killed the other day, allegedly by a man jealous that his ex-girlfriend had started dating the ADA. [KTUU]

    * Legislature amends law “to protect quacks.” That sounds like a good use of their time. [Slate]

    * David appeared on Today’s Verdict to discuss his new book, Supreme Ambitions. Also on the show was the creator of Lawsuit — The Game, featured in our holiday gift guide for lawyers. [BronxNet]

    * “How Many Bites Do Sloppy Lawyers Get At The Apple?” Oh. I get it. [Redline]

    * Lawrence Mitchell is back and talking about inequality. It’s much more what you’d expect from a legal academic than poetry about ogling women in the park. [Washington Post]

    * Sometimes even squishy toys take a hit: Nerf ordered to pay $73 million in back royalties. [North Dallas Gazette]

    * Congrats to Gawker General Counsel Heather Dietrick on her new role as President. [New York Observer]

    * Sad news: Kirkland associate and Northwestern Law ’13 grad Jeremy Adler died unexpectedly last week. Our thoughts are with his family and friends. [Inside Bay Area]

    1 Comment / / Dec 10, 2014 at 5:31 PM
  • HungerGamesPoster

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.09.14

    * New Jersey’s new tort liability ruling is an important first step to a real-life Hunger Games. [The Legal Blitz]

    * A holiday shopping guide to beer and wine involved in intellectual property disputes. Clever. [Trademark and Copyright Law Blog]

    * “There’s an app for that!” Lawyers create “Driving While Black” app for your smartphone. [The Oregonian]

    * Speaking of Oregon, the University of Oregon is in the midst of a teaching strike that not only impacts its football team, but caused an immigration law issue when statements the school made were interpreted as threats to the immigration status of foreign teachers if they joined the strike. [Daily Nous]

    * According to Dean LeDuc, Thomas M. Cooley Law is sad that it failed to sell the Mason Temple building in downtown Lansing to the state senate. Except there’s not really any mention that the state senate was ever interested. Perhaps their interest was reported by the same people behind the Cooley Rankings. [Lansing City Pulse]

    * If you liked Mark Hermann’s rundown of business development tactics, here some other suggestions for what more lawyers and law students could be doing to develop business. [Law and More]

    * New OSHA rules a-comin’. [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

    3 Comments / / Dec 9, 2014 at 5:30 PM
  • ue1rzou0v0zczi6obyae

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.08.14

    * The NAACP Legal Defense Fund took to Twitter to name every unarmed person of color killed by the police since 1999. Gawker compiled short bios on each. [Gawker]

    * Texas planning to ban the “affluenza” defense. [Lowering the Bar]

    * Pillsbury just moved into a cozy little office. Emphasis on “little.” [The National Law Journal]

    * Georgetown Law students of color raise similar concerns as Columbia students. Again, I don’t understand emotional trauma and I definitely think extensions should be measured in days and not weeks, but it strikes me all the people complaining about the extensions are just exposing themselves as bad students. If you think your neighbor getting 2 more days will hurt your grade, you’re the one with the studying problem. [Georgetown Law Coalition]

    * And now Harvard. [Harvard Law Coalition]

    * If you rent a refrigerator, you consent to an arbitrator hearing your case after a repairman robs and beats you. Sounds about right. [Public Justice]

    * Uber ban after rape allegations. [Redline]

    * The Supreme Court told BP that no matter how much it tried, it can’t slip out of its settlement agreement like an oil-soaked seagull. [Think Progress]

    * Finally, in the wake of the Eric Garner case, it’s worth looking back at what Justice Marshall told us about police chokeholds. [Mother Jones]

    8 Comments / / Dec 8, 2014 at 5:04 PM
  • Oh New York, why did you have to make Caesar angry?

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.05.14

    * New York has rejected recognizing a chimpanzee as a “person.” [PrawfsBlawg]

    * Which law schools are most conservative? Most liberal? [FiveThirtyEight]

    * Elie’s new job as “deal judge.” [Dealbreaker]

    * Lawyer suspended amid accusations that he sexted three clients with nude photos of himself and told one “she could ‘ride bareback’ with him.” [ABA Journal]

    * Duquesne says it denied professor tenure because she was bad at the whole “teaching” part of her job. Whoa! When has that ever mattered to tenure? [TaxProf Blog]

    * Josh and Jess sit down with Judge Matthew Sciarrino to talk about the new Star Wars trailer. I don’t know. Looks kind of boring. We need George Lucas to spice it up with a Special Edition version. [The Legal Geeks]

    * Prosecutor recites “Dixie” at closing argument of a black man’s trial. [Idaho Statesman]

    9 Comments / / Dec 5, 2014 at 4:42 PM
  • Captainamerica1

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.04.14

    Captainamerica1* Finally something with bipartisan support. Nazis are bad. [Lowering the Bar]

    * 80 year old law student graduates. We would say he’ll literally being paying this off for the rest of his life, but… England. [Legal Cheek]

    * Elie was in the paper today! [New York Daily News]

    * Yesterday we had a partner admitting law firms are targets for hackers. Maybe those hackers should take on the geniuses at Sony. [Gawker]

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    Morning Docket: 12.04.14
    * Looking for a cool job? Here’s one. Seriously, this looks like a great gig for someone looking to get into altLaw. [Diligence Engine]

    * Biglaw runs up big bills. Really big bills. [Last Honest Lawyer]

    * Blast from the past: patent pendency in 1993. [Patently O]

    3 Comments / / Dec 4, 2014 at 5:00 PM
  • cigarette

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.03.14

    * As we’ve addressed, the grand jury declined to indict the officer in the police-cause homicide — per the medical examiner — of Eric Garner. [New York Times]

    * This is a good time to remember Eric Garner was killed for the horrible crime of selling loosies, a product that developed a black market in NYC in response to rising cigarette taxes. Evading cigarette taxes should be a crime. But, like, a “here’s your $50 ticket” crime, not the death penalty. [Huffington Post]

    * An anonymous Georgetown law student has filed suit against the school and one of its instructors, Rabbi Barry Freundel, for “luring her to the bath as part of her studies at the school.” And who didn’t have that lesson in Civ Pro? [Washington Post]

    * Another in the continuing series looking back on a decade of Chief Justice Roberts. This time looking back at the slow and steady drive to curtail women’s rights. [Constitutional Accountability Center]

    * Remember the woman suing the owner of the dog that her dogs killed? She’s dropped her suit. [ABC News]

    * The Bar Association of San Francisco is hosting an event next Tuesday featuring Chief Judge Alex Kozinski entitled: The Wizard of Koz. Um, may not be the best time to use to “Cos” sound in a title. But that aside, it promises to be an interesting event if you’re in the area. [San Francisco Bar]

    * Brian Finch of Pillsbury Winthrop talks cyberattacks and admits what everyone else wants to deny: law firms are a weak link in cybersecurity. [Bloomberg TV]

    10 Comments / / Dec 3, 2014 at 5:15 PM
  • Scantron

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.02.14

    Scantron* A modest proposal for a new course evaluation form. [LawProfBlawg]

    * An interview with former Senator George Mitchell. Did you know he turned down Justice Breyer’s seat because he wanted “to pass significant health care legislation.” The appropriate 90s response is to cue Nelson Muntz. [Coverage Opinions]

    * George Washington may have doomed your smartphone privacy. But if it makes you feel any better he probably didn’t mean to. [Redline]

    * California lawyers are 35 percent more in debt than they were 6 years ago. [Cal Lawyer]

    * “He sent three clients explicit text messages that included photographs of his erect penis.” Fun addendum: if you read the full opinion, because the associate wrote off his time for sex that was, rightly, the firm’s 8.4 violation! I hope they weren’t the ones who turned him in. [Legal Profession Blog]

    * A panel of legal analysts weigh in on the nomination of Loretta Lynch to succeed Eric Holder as Attorney General and discuss what her nomination means in the context of civil rights. [RH Reality Check]

    * Do you need a live CLE lecture? Pick up 12 credits and grab some drinks with some ATL editors afterward. [Above the Law]

    6 Comments / / Dec 2, 2014 at 5:00 PM
  • bananas

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 12.01.14

    * What’s happening to all the Bingham partners that are not joining Morgan Lewis? Here’s the latest on the lateral moves of “the Forgotten.” [Reuters (sub. req.)]

    * “Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” That’s not at all what police said after throwing a guy in jail for brandishing a banana. [CBS News]

    * Is it possible to save the Supreme Court from partisanship? [Bloomberg Politics]

    * You think you had a ritzy Thanksgiving dinner? Well, some jackholes somewhere spent $35,000 for a Thanksgiving dinner devoted to conspicuous consumption in a world of inequity. [Daily Kos]

    * Shearman & Sterling’s Richard Hsu continues his wonderful podcast on the lives of lawyers, this week chatting with Sean Patrick Butler, Sr. Corporate Counsel at Cisco, about Butler’s decision to live two hours away from San Francisco to live the rural life. [Hsu Untied]

    * This guy is compiling stats on bar exam testing patterns. He’s got some California data up already. Perhaps with some reader contributions, he can get widespread coverage. [Bar Exam Stats]

    * When it comes to legal scholarship, women are earning more citations than men according to one study. There are a lot of caveats to be had, but it looks like the law has one, finite area where the gender gap is narrow. [TaxProf Blog]

    * One-third of lawyers are taking on more pro bono work these days. Good for them. [Robert Half Legal]

    16 Comments / / Dec 1, 2014 at 5:05 PM
  • devil's advocate

    Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.26.14

    Ed. note: Above the Law will be dark on Thanksgiving and on a reduced publishing schedule on Friday, November 28, while we recover from turkey-induced comas.

    * Holy backfire Batman! Florida desperately wanted to display a nativity scene in the State Capitol because it’s more important than making real laws. Now they’re probably going to be forced to display a scene from the Satanic Temple. [Slate]

    * Researchers assert that college prestige has no bearing on the quality of the teaching. Would this carry over to law schools? [TaxProf Blog]

    * The National Bar Association, representing predominantly African-American attorneys and judges, has issued a response to the grand jury’s decision in the Michael Brown shooting. [The National Bar Association]

    * Speaking of Ferguson, apparently the investigator listed Darren Wilson as the “victim.” If you needed any more evidence of the power of semantics. [Lowering the Bar]

    * The CATO Institute talks about the First Amendment and One, Inc. v. Olesen. It’s an hour-and-a-half panel discussion. Pretty impressive for a 24-word (plus one citation) decision. [C-SPAN]

    * Is it a lie? Well, that depends on what your definition of “lie” is? [Dorf on Law]

    * Are over the knee boots appropriate office attire? [Corporette]

    * 8 women who left the law to follow their passions. [One 400]

    * Yesterday, we suggested you should write more thank you notes. Well, here are some reasons why you shouldn’t. [The Muse ]

    29 Comments / / Nov 26, 2014 at 1:41 PM

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