Obamacare

* Some people are very, very happy with today’s Obamacare ruling. [Constitutional Accountability Center]

* And some people aren’t. Ah, Sesame Street conservatism: single words must be sounded out in complete isolation. Forget all those sentences and what not. [Breitbart]

* But this is the best quip at Justice Scalia’s newly dubbed “SCOTUSCare.” [The Faculty Lounge]

* Law student cleared of hit man murder of ex-boyfriend. [Legal Cheek]

* What the hell is going on in Massachusetts? Bar exam passage rates are in from February: 56.6 percent overall, and only 66.7 percent for first-time takers. That’s pretty bad when you consider that last year, those numbers were 80 percent and 87 percent, respectively. [Massachusetts Court System]

* It’s been a while since we checked in on the weird and wild “Judge Bill Pryor and Gay Porn” kerfuffle. Now there’s speculation on the man who brought the pictures to the fore. [Legal Schnauzer]

* It’s hot out there, man. [What About Clients?]

* Amal Clooney’s firm reportedly has a lawyer working for £1.50 an hour, which in U.S. dollars is “piddly squat.” [Legal Cheek]

* People are pretty worked up over raisins. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

* “A video shot in court shows a lawyer tussling with bailiffs and being forcibly removed in handcuffs from a foreclosure hearing.” Go on… [Daily Business Review]

* Maybe that outsourcing thing was a bad idea for Biglaw. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]

* Keith Lee reviews Lat’s Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link). [Associate’s Mind]

* Yahoo! General counsel Ron Bell discusses the challenges and rewards of representing the tech giant. [Hsu Untied]

* Speaking of Yahoo!, on the eve of Obergefell, here’s a quick guide to the American government’s war on gays. [Yahoo!]

* Elizabeth Wydra, chief counsel at the Constitutional Accountability Center, discusses the Affordable Care Act with Bob Garfield. Listen now while the ACA is still a thing. [On The Media]

* Mitt Romney is going to fight Evander Holyfield. Man, Romney has been beaten by a black guy like that since 2012. Oooh, also, Floyd Mayweather just found his next opponent. [CNN]

* Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore’s son was arrested and charged with drug possession yesterday and then blamed the media… somehow. I blame the moral vacuum created when they took down the Ten Commandments. [Al.com]

* The long-awaited Justice Scalia play is out. It’s like Tony and Tina’s Wedding with more gun control and abortion. [WTOP]

* Professor Baude has a cute theory how the Obama administration could ignore a negative verdict in King v. Burwell. [New York Times]

* Not everyone thinks Professor Baude’s hypothetical is a serious option. [Concurring Opinions]

* Israel has blocked polling in advance of the election to prevent bandwagon voting. Professor Somin evaluates the efficacy of the plan. It probably won’t affect the outcome, but if you thought Republicans threw a hissy-fit over the polls in 2008 and 2012, wait until a candidate they really care about loses. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

* A nice little maxim (get it?) for the trial lawyer looking to hone their craft. Of course, if you show them a glint of broken glass in the first act, it better be the murder weapon in the second act. [What About Clients?]

* Speaking of second acts, this profile of former Skadden partner Harriet Posner discusses life after Biglaw. [A Lawyer’s Life]

* When the judge starts quoting Monty Python, it means he hates you. [Lowering the Bar]

* When a tax official died at the office, it took his co-workers two days to notice. To paraphrase Roger Sterling, “he died as he lived: surrounded by people who didn’t pay attention to him.” [TaxProf Blog]

* What makes a client want to hire a particular lawyer? Is it Throwback Thursday pics of the lawyers as kids? No? These lawyers think it is. [Legal Cheek]

* The “stop hitting yourself theory of statutory interpretation” is my new favorite canon. [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

* Radio Shack is going under, which is the perfect time to ask: what if it was a HYDRA front all along? [The Legal Geeks]

* If America wants to incarcerate fewer people, it needs to take a hard look at what it plans to do with violent offenders, because they’re a bigger part of the prison system than most realize. [PrawfsBlawg]

* Today would be Jack Kerouac’s 93rd birthday. In case you wanted to imagine a life unchained from your desk, you should read some of his stuff. [What About Clients?]

* Pretty significant typo… [Legal Cheek]

* King v. Burwell plaintiffs’ attorney Michael Carvin of Jones Day has some interesting things to say about Obamacare. Like being sure to characterize the law as the product “by living white women and minorities,” which in some circles constitutes throwing shade. Racist circles. [Talking Points Memo]

* South Carolina makes its potential magistrate judges take the same Wonderlic test given to potential NFL draft picks. The justice system is even based on football down there. I assume occasionally they’ll let a defendant think they’ll get off and then give him the chair and the jury yells, “CLEMSON!” [Lowering the Bar]

* We take a break from our regularly scheduled NS segment, “Louisiana Seems Crazy,” to bring you a great idea out of Louisiana. Effective May 1, lawyers can earn their CLE hours by doing pro bono work. Brilliant. More substantive legal work to fill a huge need and less garbled streaming video. [New Orleans City Business]

* OK now back to regularly scheduled programming: arrest warrant issued for New Orleans lawyer accused of intentionally triggering a mistrial by refusing to participate in jury selection. I think Perry Mason did that once. It was one of the more obscure episodes. [Nola]

* Leave it to the people who wield the awesome punitive power of the state to be the first to give themselves a get out of jail free card. [USA Today]

* Richard Hsu scores an interview with Jon Lindsey of legal recruiting firm Major, Lindsey & Africa. Apparently, the busy founding partner Lindsey really knows how to juggle things. Literally. [Hsu Untied]

* History buffs out there may recall that Emperor Augustus instituted a bunch of moral reforms during his reign that really only succeeded in revealing that his daughter was a total whore. But what if the Emperor’s prude rules actually helped solidify his broader goals? [Law & Humanities Blog]

* According to the latest data from NALP, summer associate hiring is up for the fifth year in a row. Hooray! But wait, don’t go licking each other’s popsicles just yet — some law firms (35 percent of them, in fact) actually reduced the number of offers they made. [National Law Journal]

* In response to outcry over bar exam reforms, this Dechert partner took time out of his day to wonder: “Is it too much to expect that future lawyers know the difference between a tort and a tenancy in common, or do we expect clients to pay them $400 an hour to learn it?” [Wall Street Journal]

* Now that oral arguments in King v. Burwell have concluded, it’s probably time you found out what’s at stake for you if you haven’t done so already, procrastinators. This is what will happen if SCOTUS strikes down Obamacare subsidies. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Edward Snowden is reportedly ready to return to the United States, provided, of course, that he’ll receive a “legal and impartial trial.” Attorney General Eric Holder has already promised Snowden that he won’t face the death penalty, so that’s a start. [CNN]

* An ADA in Texas apparently referred to defense counsel as a “motherf*cker” in front of jurors during a trial. We think now would be a great time to add this to the list of things that will get you kicked off a case. [Austin American-Statesmen via ABA Journal]

* A Tampa law firm replaced its regular desks to make happier and healthier lawyers. I’d never heard of a tread desk, but I want one. [Bay News 9]

* Prosecutors eviscerated after court finds out that they straight falsified the transcript of a confession. That’s bold. [Observer]

* How can schools keep top faculty? Giving them less to do of course! [TaxProf Blog]

* Eliminating a**hole from your vocabulary. That sounds like a terrible idea. [Katz Justice]

* A handy tool displays bar passage rates by law school. [Bar Exam Stats]

* Berkeley’s Federalist Society chapter is talking about proper policing by inviting a cop who was suspended for striking protesters and ordering a false arrest during an AIDS demonstration. Seems like he’s a good choice. [Berkeley Law]

* If you were wondering how the King plaintiffs would answer for how their reading runs contrary to hundreds of pages of text, the answer is… they couldn’t really. Not that the oral argument really matters to how anyone’s going to vote. [Constitutional Accountability Center]

* Conservative Courts just get no respect. [Politico]

* Meet David King of King v. Burwell, the epic Obamacare case to be argued before the U.S. Supreme Court today. [New York Times]

* And meet the two legal heavyweights who will be arguing the case before SCOTUS. [Politico via How Appealing]

* Meanwhile, another Supreme Court has put a stop to same-sex marriage down in Alabama — for now. [Buzzfeed]

* General David Petraeus reaches a plea deal, requiring him to plead guilty to a misdemeanor and pay a fine (but no prison sentence). [Washington Post]

* It’s not as sexy as Obamacare or marriage equality, but the collection of state sales tax on out-of-state purchases made online is a pretty important issue — and Justice Kennedy wants SCOTUS to revisit it. [How Appealing (linkwrap)]

* In the wake of a leadership shake-up, Cadwalader is beefing up its Houston energy practice — but is that a wise idea, with the price of oil spiraling downward? [American Lawyer]

* Finally, something that Elie Mystal and Jordan Weissmann can agree upon: dropping the LSAT is a bad idea. [Slate]

* A jury of eight men and 10 women will start hearing arguments today in the trial of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, defendant in the Boston Marathon bombing. [How Appealing (linkwrap)]

* Legal ethics guru Monroe Freedman, RIP. [ABA Journal]

* Getting a SCOTUS justice to attend your wedding is tough, but maybe invite one for dinner? [Washington Post]

* A DOJ investigation concludes that the Ferguson Police Department and courts engaged in a “pattern and practice” of discrimination against African Americans. The investigation was conducted by the DOJ’s division of obvious things. [CNN]

* When police didn’t respond to his call fast enough, this guy tried to rob a convenience store to get the cops out there faster. And then they still didn’t come… [Legal Juice]

* King v. Burwell argument is almost here! Conservatives are really eager to take the law down. But would hurting Obamacare really hurt conservatives more in the end? [Bloomberg View]

* A California lawyer is proposing a new law to address homosexuality with “bullets to the head or by any other convenient method.” I don’t think that’ll pass. [Huffington Post]

* Authorities still harassing family who trusted a 10-year-old to walk outside without a parent hovering over them. It’s hard to criticize helicopter parents when they’re only following the law. [Washington Post]

* Well, well, well. Now that they’ve sent out a harassing C&D letter, Katy Perry’s people have thrown some Left Shark merchandise up on their site. [Katy Perry]

* Fascinating use of the Internet: a crowdfunding campaign to help refugee mothers and children secure release from government detention. [Go Fund Me]

* In this preview of Professor Nancy Leong’s latest videocast, she talks with Professor Jessica Clarke about how courts treat sexual harassment cases in same- vs. opposite-sex harassment. [TheRightsCast]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVqYDrYNV0Y&utm_content=bufferd2ca9&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer

* You betta work… on those C&D letters! The viral picture of Cindy Crawford’s “unretouched” midsection is allegedly fake, and a lawyer for the photographer who took the original picture is threatening publishers with legal action if the supposedly doctored photos aren’t taken down immediately. [CBS News]

* You know that law school graduates from the Lost Generation are screwed when the first vignette from an article about the sad state of financial affairs for “recession millennials” is about a 2011 law grad who’s drowning in law school debt. [FiveThirtyEight]

* Folks are going crazy over King v. Burwell, so it’s a great time to run the odds on which justices will give ACA the axe. FYI, Justice Alito is “more likely to be struck by lightning while committing in-person voter fraud” than uphold Obamacare. [ThinkProgress]

* If you’re going to be in Washington, D.C., next weekend, why not stop by the Politics & Prose Bookstore to see David Lat have a chat with Adam Liptak of the New York Times? OMG, you can even get your copy of Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link) signed. [Facebook]

* With oral arguments in the King v. Burwell case slated to be heard on Wednesday, the Supreme Court is going to have a busy week — but most Americans won’t know about it. Below is a new TV ad pushing SCOTUS to allow cameras in the courtroom. [Fix the Court]

http://youtu.be/jA8B80fy0OM

* Unfortunately, it seems that if you want to get an elite legal education in this country, you’re going to have to pay an arm and a leg for it. This year’s NLJ Top 10 Go-To Law Schools each have a sticker price that’s greater than $50K. [National Law Journal]

* Hamline University’s president thinks it was smarter for her law school to merge with William Mitchell Law than for it to close altogether — hey, it’ll still bear the Hamline name and its dying carcass won’t be on her books anymore! [Star Tribune]

* Later this week, SCOTUS will hear oral arguments in King v. Burwell, a case that could decimate the Affordable Care Act as we know it. At this point, the justices must be contemplating how many people will lose if the plaintiffs here win. [Wall Street Journal]

* An ADA from the Brooklyn DA’s office who prosecuted drug cases was canned after his colleagues learned that he failed to report his personal connection to an admitted cocaine dealer. Perhaps they were jealous he refused to share his hookup. [New York Daily News]

* In case you missed it, Above the Law, your favorite legal website, has been “rankle[d]” by a new series on CNNMoney called “Above the Law.” We know you’re as ticked off about this as we are, so we hope you’ll help us write our cease-and-desist letter. [Am Law Daily]

* Dumb person suing the NFL over its entirely correct (though the rule is pretty stupid) no-catch call in the Cowboys/Packers game. For $88 billion. Oh, because Dez is number 88. I get it. To read the whole hand-written complaint, head to the next page…. [Sports Illustrated]

* The feds charge a bumbling Russian bank employee with trying to spy on America. Viewed in light of the details of the Anna Chapman ring, I think maybe Russia should just give up trying to spy. [Huffington Post]

* “Judge Feels That Chris Brown’s Tour Doesn’t Count as Community Service.” Well then. [Defamer]

* More of how the LSAT is supremely important to getting into law school. [Law and More]

* College suspends a student for selling video of a campus brawl. School says the sale was a code of conduct violation… though it can’t explain how. [Chronicle of Higher Education]

* The government’s brief in King v. Burwell tries desperately to show that conservatives themselves understood the plain meaning of the Affordable Care Act and anticipated states opting out of creating exchanges. Thankfully, the conservative justices obliged by writing exactly that in their NFIB v. Sebelius dissent. Between this and the marriage equality cases, Justice Scalia is just getting torched by his own dissents. [Talking Points Memo]

https://www.scribd.com/doc/253504322/Terry-Hendrix-NFL-Lawsuit

* Today’s NS is all about stupid stuff you shouldn’t do. A woman poured hot bacon grease on an ex-boyfriend “because it was time for him to go.” She’s going to spend a couple of years thinking about whether that was the best way of telling him. [The Seattle Times]

* If you’re the kind of guy to skip hearings in felony narcotics cases, maybe don’t tattoo Tom Brady’s helmet on your skull. [The Smoking Gun]

* Stonewalling federal judicial nominees. Not cool. [The Tennessean]

* What the hell? Bigamy hearing for congressman’s wife delayed for emergency breast implant surgery. [The Big Story / Associated Press]

* It’s another compilation of “crazy laws” from around the country. Whole bunches of stupid stuff you can’t do. [Slate]

* Republicans swear up and down that the Affordable Care Act only provided subsidies for states that create exchanges. But if that’s the plan, they shouldn’t have left a paper trail of explicitly saying the opposite for years. [The New Republic]

* This editorial must have been so much fun to write. Local newspaper tees off on petty local politician who threatened to sue them for using his name without his permission. Like, in a story about him. Welcome to First Amendment 101, dude. Professor Volokh has some fun commentary. [The Frederick News-Post]

* A new Congress gets down to business today, and they begin by proposing a solution to the biggest issue in America by floating a national abortion ban. Well, they have to talk about something now that Obama’s got the Dow around 18,000. [ThinkProgress]

* Not really legal, but Archer’s back. Holly Anderson talks to the executive producer about this season. [Grantland]

* Harold Hamm’s ex-wife rejected a $974 million check. I just want to know what purchase she wants to make that has her saying, “Eh, I’ve got to pass on that $974 million.” [The Oklahoman]

* Keeping politics out of King v. Burwell is like making a Fast & Furious movie without Vin Diesel. Sure you can do it, but it’s gonna suck. [The New Republic]

* What the future holds for “just-in-time” workers like Alex Rich. [Law and More]

* The minds behind the Notorious R.B.G. meme have a book deal! And it’s a Justice Ginsburg biography. Bring it on. [New York Magazine]

* David keeps on touring America talking about Supreme Ambitions (affiliate link) — and also much, much more (including revelations about his personal life). This time it’s an interview with WHYY in Philly. [WHYY]

https://soundcloud.com/whyy-public-media/david-lats-supreme-ambitions-legal-blogs-and-the-supreme-court