Discrimination is not a ghost of the past, it is an issue that haunts our society today.
To paraphrase what O.J. Simpson said when he entered his not-guilty plea, you will “absolutely, 100 percent” love this show.
Most everyone knows what an elevator speech is: it’s a short, pithy, memorable description of a company’s services. Lawyers have always built their reputations on their expertise, such that the creation of an elevator pitch should be one of the easiest things for an attorney to do; however, many lawyers still stumble over the basic question: “What do you do?”
In a long, rambling screed, a top legal recruiter shares his views on why minorities fail in law and it’s… something.
* Harvard Law professor Larry Lessig is now depending on a future President Trump to enact the campaign finance reforms he built his failed presidential bid upon. He’ll be waiting for a while. [The Crimson]
* Ted Cruz has pretty much always been a douche. [Funny or Die]
* The People v. O.J. Simpson explores racism, sexism, and more — all through costume. [Fashionista]
* U.S. Senators: They’re just like us! Claire McCaskill live-tweets her jury duty experience. [The Slot]
* How can you avoid burnout as a lawyer? [Associate’s Mind]
* Why are embattled public defender offices actually excited about the lawsuits against them? [Christian Science Monitor]
* Practical advice for taking advantage of the opportunities that are staring you right in the face. [Guile is Good]
* Get the inside scoop on why Rudy Giuliani jumped ship to Greenberg Traurig. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]
* Martin Shkreli’s hearing before the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform has been rescheduled due to this weekend’s blizzard. This will give the reviled pharma bro even more time to brush up on constitutional law. [CBS News]
* Uh-oh! Thanks to some “cash flow issues” — like partners not being paid on time — King & Wood Mallesons is currently in the process of raising capital and will be conducting a review of its overall financial structure. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg]
* Cert denied! The justices of the Supreme Court may have bought these lawyers’ arguments and struck down a crucial part of the Voting Rights Act in the Shelby County case, but they’re certainly not buying their request for $2 million in legal fees. [Reuters]
* A hate crime without a resolution? Police are closing their investigation into the defacement of black professors’ portraits at Harvard Law without having found a perp. Maybe they decided to take Elie Mystal’s advice not to feed the trolls. [Boston.com]
* Florida State settled a lawsuit filed by Erica Kinsman, a former student who claimed Jameis Winston raped her, for $900K, but the school claims $700K of that amount will go to her legal team. Her lawyers, however, would politely beg to differ. [USA Today]
* Texas Governor Greg Abbott is calling for a constitutional convention to add 9 new amendments to the constitution in the name of state rights. Texas, you’re drunk, go home. [Dallas Morning News]
* Clients are now demanding to text their lawyers. This is the official end of free time. [Daily Lawyer Tips]
* Constructing the history of black pain. [Lawyers, Guns and Money]
* The SEC has announced sanctions against Steven Cohen — he’ll be barred from managing hedge funds for two years. [Dealbreaker]
* Dealing with ambiguity in bankruptcy law when it comes to liability payments. [Law and More]
* A sandwich? You just committed armed robbery for a crappy sandwich? Bad decision, dude. [Legal Juice]
* A great podcast previewing the trial of the Winter Soldier. [The Legal Geeks]
* People in the United Nations are doing a lot of legal research on a very disturbing subject. [Vox]
* David Schwimmer is playing the late Robert Kardashian in American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson — but that doesn’t mean he’ll meet with the Kardashian sisters. [The Hollywood Reporter]
* If, for some reason, you need yet another reminder that we have a terrible problem in this country with racism and police aggression, here is an eloquent reminder. [Black Debate Guy]
* Does the public have a right to know if their legislators are sleeping with lobbyists? One Missouri lawmaker thinks they do. [Columbia Tribune]
* Is it child endangerment to leave a sleeping baby alone? Is that a cultural thing? [Law and More]
Can you be “excessive” when punishing a racist?
If you ever wonder why some lawyers are concerned about not weakening the First Amendment in any way, consider this an ideal exhibit.
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* Cops arrest a stormtrooper in Massachusetts. See, J.J. Abrams! This is what happens when you have a black stormtrooper. [Lowering the Bar]
* Litigation finance crosses a new threshold: Gerchen Keller announces that it now has $1.4 billion in assets. [Am Law Daily]
* Deep look at Rob Billot whose career as a corporate lawyer took a wild turn when he decided to take on DuPont for the last 16 years. [New York Times Magazine]
* Are you going to San Diego ComicCon? Are you willing to cosplay to participate in a mock trial? These folks want to talk with you. [The Legal Geeks]
* Americans lost their minds — one way or the other — over President Obama’s tears yesterday, but they’re a well-established part of advocacy to be handled lightly. Or you could just bawl over everything and see if that works. [Law and More]
* Let’s check in at the AALS Conference. Yep, everything seems perfectly normal over there…
That’s the CALI.org booth if you’re visiting the show (photo grabbed off Twitter).
If only all racists were dealt with this swiftly.
* In his annual report on the state of the federal judiciary, Chief Justice John Roberts asked that lawyers stop treating each other like garbage and do their best to “avoid antagonistic tactics, wasteful procedural maneuvers and teetering brinksmanship.” [New York Times]
* Justice Antonin Scalia, the Supreme Court’s “lightning rod for controversy,” recently said during a small speaking engagement that the government not only can, but should, support religion. After all, “God had been very good to us.” [AP]
* Albany Law’s dean says don’t believe the horror stories you hear about law school, especially since “[t]his is a really good time to apply.” It’s worth noting that she wasn’t able to pay off her loans until she was a tenured law professor. [Albany Times Union]
* The Arkansas Law (Little Rock) professor who’s suing his school over access to public records has added a retaliation claim to his complaint thanks to the “allegations of two rogue, race-baiting professors.” Ooh, that sounds juicy! [Arkansas Democrat Gazette]
* Is your favorite music streaming service screwing your favorite musicians out of their hard-earned cash? Spotify may soon be facing yet another multimillion-dollar class-action lawsuit over artists’ royalty payments (or the lack thereof) in 2016. [Billboard]
* Michael G. Oxley, co-sponsor of the Sarbanes-Oxley Act, RIP. [New York Times]
I hope this helps someone trying to keep it together.
The Mall of America is treading on some thin ice.
* New York Governor Andrew Cuomo is instating mass pardons for youthful offenders. [New York Times]
* The founding fathers were better about defending the rights of Muslims than (some) modern Republicans. [Washington Post]
* Preet Bharara’s latest target — the evils of auto-subscribing. [Law and More]
* Ah, the Christmas season. That time of the year when customer service is paradoxically at its best and worst. [That’s My Argument!]
* Both Kaye Scholer partner Evan Greebel (formerly of Katten Muchin) and Turing Pharmaceuticals CEO Martin Shkreli pleaded not guilty to securities fraud charges. Now, the world is left to weep because Skhreli’s Wu-Tang album wasn’t seized. [Reuters]
* “You are not an American because you got sworn in on a Koran.” The Hate Crimes Unit of the New York Police Department is investigating a series of threatening calls made to Judge Carolyn Walker-Diallo, Brooklyn’s first Muslim judge. [WSJ Law Blog]
* David Lola, the contract attorney who sued Skadden and Tower Legal for overtime pay with claims he wasn’t practicing law, settled his claims for $75,000. But now we don’t know if doc reviewers are entitled to overtime pay. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg]
* Slater & Gordon, the world’s first publicly traded law firm, continues to watch as its stock price tumbles. The firm’s shares are now worth A$0.89 after it decided to pull its earnings guidance, and they’ve lost 90 percent of their value since April. [The Guardian]
* That’s not how you’re supposed to examine briefs: A Maryland court commissioner was charged with visual surveillance with prurient intent and misconduct in office after allegedly using his cellphone to take an upskirt photo of a courthouse employee. [AP]
Mistrial declared in the first Freddie Gray case.
It’s not hard to see where this Trump thing is going next.