Shaquille O’Neal

I want to do things people tell me I can’t. You don’t think I can do three years of law school? Watch me.

– Shaquille O’Neal. We already knew Big Aristotle was looking into a law degree, but now we know where he wants to go. Once the big man is finished taking the LSAT, he has his sights set on Georgia Tech, Georgia State, or John Marshall Law School. Shaq, your friends at ATL would recommend Georgia State. We’d be alright with Georgia Tech. But we would not recommend John Marshall. Let’s just say it’s the Kazaam of law schools.

UPDATE (3:00 p.m.): Maybe there’s a joke in there that was a tad too dry. Let’s just say there’s a reason why we — who advise against going to most law schools — would be “alright” with one of the law schools Shaq has mentioned because we don’t think he’d really end up going there.

The work was very rigorous, but very enjoyable. And I’m not done. I think I’m going to try law school next. I’m thinking about it. We’ll see.

Shaquille O’Neal, commenting on his possible plans for the future after receiving his doctorate in education from Barry University.

(I expect that former ATL columnist Marc Edelman, an assistant professor of law at Barry University, will encourage Shaq to go to law school by directing him toward my endorsement of Ben Wallace’s law school dreams.)

* With a $10 million donation, it looks like UCLA School of Law can afford to stop playing it fast and loose with its employment statistics. [New York Times]

* In light of Facebook’s “smoking gun” evidence of fraud, Paul Ceglia didn’t skip town. He skipped the entire country. [Los Angeles Times]

* You can be a runaway bride, but it’ll cost you a pretty ringgit when you get sued. That, and your 1,200 guests will be pissed. [Daily Mail]

* Would you allegedly kidnap for Shaq over a non-existent sex tape? He must be leading a good life if he can’t even keep track of his video exploits. [New York Daily News]

* People are saying that Felicia Pearson’s heroin distribution charges are a case of life imitating art. Do you know her background? This is more like life imitating life. [Yahoo! News]


* A jury found Warren Jeffs guilty of sexual assault, confirming that just because there’s grass on the field, it doesn’t mean that you should play ball. [CNN]

* John H. Ray III finally sued Ropes & Gray for treating him like the “token black associate.” That’s only funny on an episode of South Park. [Am Law Daily]

* Evidence in Shaquille O’Neal’s civil racketeering lawsuit has been sealed. Kazaam might have an attitude, but there’s no way he’d ever frame someone for child porn. [South Florida Sun-Sentinel]

* No wire hangers rent-controlled apartments ever! Faye Dunaway: “Can’t evict me, ‘cause I f**cking quit this place. I hope you have a terrible life.” [New York Times]

* Lil Wayne might have some trouble making ladies’ beds rock after being served with this $15M copyright infringement lawsuit. [The Juice / Billboard]

* Christian Louboutin won a small victory against Yves Saint Laurent in court. Maybe soon YSL will be as red with embarrassment as the soles the fashion house tried to copy. [Styleite]

Page 1 of 1695312345...16953