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It’s just nice clothing. There’s nothing to be afraid of.

Are you afraid of fashion? You’re not alone.

Many male lawyers would rather not deal with picking clothes. These attorneys can negotiate billion-dollar deals or address juries without fear, but the concept of “business casual” fills them with terror.

If you count yourself among the fashion-impaired — or if you see yourself as stylish, but in need of a wardrobe expansion — here are two lawyers who can help….

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Oh my, I can’t believe a major legal publisher is selling cheap-looking plaques for hilariously useless achievements. Actually, I can totally believe it.

I’ve never bought into the idea that lawyers need “credibility trophies.” Lawyers who festoon their offices with scores of plaques come across as desperate. Lots of plaques commemorate dubious achievements, and any colleague or client given a few minutes to examine the decoration will discover this and wonder, “Why did he/she hang this?” But sadly, much of the profession ascribes to the “plaques for plaques’ sake” mentality.

If an office must be adorned with memorabilia of legal achievement, frame the law school diploma, bar admission certificate(s), and any major achievements like being president of the bar association or something. These provide all the indicia of achievement a lawyer needs.

And nothing says “plaques for plaques’ sake” like a redundant plaque. Like a plaque that says, “If you didn’t notice the diploma on the other wall, this certifies that he REALLY did go to Harvard.”

But these plaques exist, and we’ve got pictures…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Bar Admission ‘Anniversary’ Plaques? Don’t Be That Guy”

The law school odyssey is coming to a close for many students this year, and before the focus shifts to studying for the bar exam and staring blankly into the middle distance contemplating disappearing job prospects, these graduates deserve some gifts.

Obviously, the best gifts for a newly minted J.D. would be “comprehensive debt relief,” “job offers,” or “straight cash, homey.” Unfortunately, you may not be able to deliver these gifts — at least not in amounts that anyone wants — or you may just not care that much about the graduate.

So we’ve compiled some gift ideas, ranging from serious to specious, for you to consider…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “A Gift Guide For Law School Grads”

Ed. note: This is the fourth installment in a new series of monthly posts, brought to you by Corporette’s Kat Griffin, which will deal with topical business and lifestyle issues that present themselves in the world of Biglaw. Send your ideas for columns to us here.

For those of you who don’t know, it’s that time of the year: time to tell the world how much you love your assistant that you’re a great manager by showering your assistant with gifts. Technically the “holiday” runs the entire last full week in April, but Administrative Professionals’ Day itself is Wednesday, April 24.

What’s the deal?

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Despite his status as an Article III demigod, Chief Justice John Roberts is a man of the people. Instead of reclining on a divan while eating frozen grapes fed to him by eunuch law clerks, which is how I’d roll if I were the Chief Justice of the United States, JGR patronizes places like Cosi, Au Bon Pain, and Carmine’s.

And the chief even goes to Starbucks — where His Honor recently revealed something surprising about himself….

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* So, after being shut down for more than two years, Caitlin Halligan asked President Obama to withdraw her nomination to the D.C. Circuit. This is how democracy works in our country, folks, and it’s pretty sad. [People For the American Way; Post Politics / Washington Post]

* In America, we’re trying to get official recognition for gay marriage. In Scotland, they’re trying to get official recognition for weddings performed by Jedi Knights. Please, by all means, proceed to stroke each other’s lightsabers over this exciting nerd news. [Volokh Conspiracy]

* Oh my god, this is something I’m definitely going to have to sit down and read, it looks so salacious and — oh. *eyeroll* This just in from the subtitle letdown department…. [Overlawyered]

* A political consultant in Nebraska apparently got himself fired because he called Sen. Danielle Conrad a C-U-Next-Tuesday on his Facebook page. That was way harsh, Tai. [Jezebel]

* Click here to listen to Professor Brian Tamanaha and Dean Lawrence Mitchell talk about rethinking the future of legal education. Tamanaha thinks the tuition is too damn high, whereas Dean Mitchell simply thinks that “life is expensive.” Not even kidding, he really said that. [Associate's Mind]

* At Target, you can definitely expect more and pay less, but that’s probably because your money’s allegedly being stolen out of the cash register. [Legal Juice]

* And just because I love just about everything that Lindsay Lohan does because she’s the hottest of all messes, here’s a timeline of her mug shots ranked in order of her sex appeal. I love that we live in a world where such a thing actually exists! [Gawker]

Ladies, are you looking to spruce up your wardrobe this spring? Whether you’re a law student hoping to interview for jobs, a partner in pursuit of a lateral opportunity, or an unemployed law grad waiting for an opportunity, it’s always important to look your very best. Because our last Gilt Group sale for men went so well, we thought we’d give our female readers a chance to enjoy some opulent fashion bliss.

Working together with MIKA, a high-end shopping website that uses cutting-edge technology to present coveted luxury goods to its customers, we’ve put together a special sale just for Above the Law readers.

We kept women working in Biglaw firms in mind for this fashion spread, right down to the model — she’s a T14 law student. This is your chance to snap up sharp and sophisticated clothing, footwear, and accessories from some of the most fabulous names in womenswear (e.g., Nicole Miller, Nanette Lepore, Cynthia Rowley).

Check it out by clicking the image above. There are only three days left on this sale, so act now.

Ladies, are you looking to spruce up your wardrobe this spring? Whether you’re a law student hoping to interview for jobs, a partner in pursuit of a lateral opportunity, or an unemployed law grad waiting for an opportunity, it’s always important to look your very best. Because our last Gilt Group sale for men went so well, we thought we’d give our female readers a chance to enjoy some opulent fashion bliss.

Working together with MIKA, a high-end shopping website that uses cutting-edge technology to present coveted luxury goods to its customers, we’ve put together a special sale just for Above the Law readers.

We kept women working in Biglaw firms in mind for this fashion spread, right down to the model — she’s a T14 law student. This is your chance to snap up sharp and sophisticated clothing, footwear, and accessories from some of the most fabulous names in womenswear (e.g., Nicole Miller, Nanette Lepore, Cynthia Rowley).

Check it out by clicking the image above. The sale starts today and is for a limited time only, so act now.

If you think you can buy this at Costco, your brain probably fits in this box.

If you walk into a Costco, buy a diamond ring, and think you are getting a “Tiffany” ring, you are an idiot and I have no sympathy for you. You deserve what you get and should probably practice breathing through your nose before going out in polite company.

But, luckily, Tiffany wants to stop you from being so easily fooled. Not because they care about you, per se. But because the thought that even one person thinks that Tiffany is selling rings through Costco is horrifying to them. It’s like asking a Penn student if they make it to football games in Happy Valley.

As we mentioned in Morning Docket, Tiffany filed a lawsuit against Costco to protect their brand….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Instead Of Buying Your Engagement Ring At Costco, Why Don’t You Just Give Her A Lump Of Coal And Tell Her To Sit On It?”

Of all the ways to say ‘I love you’ this is the most boring.

I hate diamonds. Besides oil, no natural resource is responsible for as much suffering. Wars are fought over diamonds, totalitarian regimes are propped up with diamond money. It all happens because of anachronistic cultural traditions that tell us women should be dressed and adorned like dolls.

Today, western women buy into the convention — because, well, that’s what happens when an entire people is hobbled by generations of unequal treatment — but do not forget that giving engagement diamonds to women is a holdover from a time when a man would pay to buy off the bride from her father. A holdover that has been amped up by the modern diamond industry. It’d be like if every time a white employer hired a black person, they got to strip him down and check his teeth… you know, for old times’ sake. “Here’s your price, now cook me something and be quick about it so I don’t have to beat you” — is what every woman should hear when she receives a shiny bauble for her ring finger.

Of course, my wife wears a diamond engagement ring, because I’m not a freaking hero. In this ridiculous world, even if the woman says “I’m not really into that diamond stuff,” you can’t really be sure and you don’t want to insult her or her family by proposing with a shared New York Times subscription (that made more sense back in the 90s, trust me). Luckily, my wife and I have been able to resist the nearly constant overtures from the diamond industry ever since. Even though every season the television tries to tell us that I just don’t love her very much unless I’m committing 25 percent of my yearly income in a constant shower of stones.

To call the diamond industry “evil” is no overstatement, as reflected in a new lawsuit….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Diamond Makers Sue Over Who’s Best At Parting Fools From Their Money”

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