Holidays and Seasons

For Students at Top Chicago Area Law Schools, It’s All About the Pie

It's almost Thanksgiving, an entire American holiday centered around gluttony and based upon the kindness of people we later tried to exterminate. And football. And pie. Lots of pie. Now, normally pie is an unqualified good (unless you are on a diet, which I never am). It's hard to see how this all-American treat could be overcomplicated. But leave it to a group of law students to ruin pie....

By Elie Mystal on November 22, 2011 10:59 am

Thanks, Pie King’s Bro.

To be clearer, the judges later told me that they asked impartial observers what had happened and the observers agreed that I had won the contest (even before the weird pumpkin pie piece tie-breaker). I understand why Facey Pie hit me with the pie, because she was just misinformed about what had happened and hadn’t seen it for herself, so she was under the impression that I had simply declared myself the winner by throwing my pie at Deep Dish. I was actually quid-pro-throwing Deep Dish’s own pie back at him. He said later that he threw it because he knew he clearly wasn’t going to win.

I had half or less of my crust left and I had finished the first half in about ten or fifteen seconds. The next person to finish her pie finished two or three minutes after that.

The point is that the judges and Facey Pie aren’t to blame and Deep Dish has impulse problems and should probably be banned from the Atrium and the listserv like Quid Pro Bro.

–Pie King

P.S. Not really though, Deep Dish is cool.

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