Attorney Offers Himself Up As Trained Monkey To Anybody With A Plan
Lawyer posts ad for office manager looking to help a monkey with a law degree.
We can debate whether or not law school is a good investment. We can throw around articles from law professors and yell and scream. OR we can just drop into the Craigslist in Reno, Nevada and take the temperature out there:
Attorney needs right hand person
…Basically, assume I am a monkey, and if you think you could work with me to see to it that you and I at least have food on the table and obey all Rules of Professional Responsibility, then please let me know.
Yeah, law school in a fantastic investment and more people should take the plunge!
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What’s weird about the set up of this Craigslist ad is that Monkey Esquire is not looking for a trained attorney to mentor him and show him the ropes. Instead he’s looking for an office manager type who will magically know how to turn his law degree into cash money. This guy wants to find Rebecca from The Practice and hire her to fix his life.
PLEASE NOTE: I have very, very little money right now. Assume I work for Uber or deliver pizzas or something to make ends meet. This is not the opportunity (I have to figure out if it has to be a job, or if it can be an independent contractor type thing like with all these delivery and ridesharing apps that I myself make money doing) for someone who does not KNOW that they could run a law practice and make it profitable with even an actual monkey as the possessor of the law license. Obviously, I will have to comply with all rules of Professional Responsibility, including those relative to monitoring non-lawyer assistants.
I like how this man is thinking: he’s got the law license just like an Uber driver has a driver’s license. It’s up to someone else to figure out how to make money off of his… talents.
At least he’s honest about the sheer breadth of things that he hasn’t thought about and doesn’t know how to do.
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I would appreciate your enunciating a plan, a prospective plan to make an arrangement like this work. How would I get clients? How would I get them to pay me? How and what are you going to get paid? How am I going to be able to have such an arrangement with you without running afoul of any laws or rules?What area of law makes sense to focus on? Will I be better off doing this (ie, a better ratio of headaches/risks to dollars per hour) than if I was working for Uber or delivering pizzas? Things like that. Remember, I will not practice in state courts. It must be a federal setting.
Lolololololol… that’s the lawyer, asking the potential office manager, how to keep from breaking “any laws or rules.”
SOMEBODY GAVE THIS GUY A LAW DEGREE. This guy could represent clients if he could just figure out how to get any. This is what American legal education has come to. You maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!
You can check out the full ad on the next page. And, you know, if you know how to run a law practice with a monkey as your lead attorney, give this guy a call.
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