Can a parent who takes time off to stay home with kids during the child-rearing years start and grow a successful law practice? Even today, most lawyers would say no — though somehow I managed even if, at times, I endured a bumpy ride.
Back then, there were few templates for balancing stay-home parenting with a career. So I was excited to stumble across a piece from Inc. by Marla Tabaka entitled Seven Tips a Stay-at=Home Parent Must Do to Achieve Entrepreneurial Success. Granted, the article is aimed at entrepreneurs — who generally have a more can-do attitude than most lawyers — but many of the tips are equally applicable to lawyers who want to parent and practice.
Tabaka’s first tip — to set realistic expectations — is perhaps the most important of all of them. She writes:
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You are on a different timetable than home-based entrepreneurs who are not raising young children… Modeling your goals after that single guy who built a tech sensation out of his garage in under two years isn’t going to bode well for your self-esteem.
Like Tabaka, my good friend and co-author, Nicole Black (who’s also a columnist here at Above the Law), is ardent about the importance of defining your own success. She advises women who choose alternative career paths to parent that:
You need to define success for yourself and understand that your concept of success must be flexible, since your frame of reference tends to alter the concept of success as well. If you buy into someone else’s concept of “success,” you are bound to be miserable.
In this same vein, Tabaka also tells parents who work from home to ignore the stigma and stereotypes. In law, I’d probably be more cautious about making the big reveal, though of course that would also depend upon the type of client.
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Tabaka’s remaining tips for for parents running businesses from home are more practical rather than psychological. They include creating a dedicate workspace (a must), becoming more organized than you’ve ever been and most importantly, using childcare when needed, notwithstanding the cost.
There’s only one point that I’d add to Tabaka’s list: don’t settle for second place when you start a business or law firm from home. Although your schedule may be more flexible than that of your partner and you may be earning less, that still doesn’t justify being tasked with all of the household chores and childcare, or your firm will suffer.
As I said, even as the workplace is evolving and becoming more flexible, the practice of law still has a long way to go. That said, for lawyers who want to stay home and continue to practice in one form or another, there are more paths forward than ever before. And that’s a good thing.
Carolyn Elefant has been blogging about solo and small firm practice at MyShingle.comsince 2002 and operated her firm, the Law Offices of Carolyn Elefant PLLC, even longer than that. She’s also authored a bunch of books on topics like starting a law practice, social media, and 21st century lawyer representation agreements (affiliate links). If you’re really that interested in learning more about Carolyn, just Google her. The Internet never lies, right? You can contact Carolyn by email at [email protected]or follow her on Twitter at @carolynelefant.