It is a well-worn adage not to talk politics at the dinner table around the holidays. Someone’s drunk uncle usually has a choice word about your given political belief and before you know it, turkey is flung across the room, you mutter your “safe word” to your spouse, and you high-tail it to the exit and start the countdown until next year’s holiday dinner.
But an equally important of advice to attorneys is that you should probably keep your unsolicited legal opinions to yourself over the holiday dinner table as well. No one liked the gunner in law school, and in the real world, it is even worse.
No, I am not saying you shouldn’t help cousin Timmy when he gets a speeding ticket or that you should refuse to revise Aunt Edna’s will for the fourth time. After all, it is the unwritten duty of the “attorney in the family” to help with such matters.
Take Control Of Your Firm’s Finances With Tools Built For Success
Position your firm for long-term growth with better financial visibility and control. Learn how to track performance, manage spending, and plan strategically—download the full e-book now.
Rather, I mean if you find yourself around family members who are engaged in a passionate discussion about a topic for which your legal knowledge could provide an answer, perhaps resist the temptation to jump in (unless asked).
I spent the holiday weekend with my in-laws, who live in a rather small rural town where my father-in-law operates a private clinic as the town’s physician. By all measures he is business savvy and has run a successful operation for a number of years. However, I could not but help overhear him complain he recently discovered he was being reimbursed less than several other nearby physicians for performing similar services.
Certainly since he was an equally qualified physician performing an equal service, the insurance companies must be illegally depriving him of money!
As I am an in-house attorney operating in the health care field, and an apparent fool, I chimed in to let him know that unless it was a government payor, such reimbursement matters are generally governed by his individual contract with each insurance company. And I further reminded him such rates are generally up for negotiation each year if he wanted to review them prior to the coming year.
Thomson Reuters Brings The Human Touch To Artificial Intelligence
A “human-in-the-loop” approach helps us bring responsible and effective AI solutions together.
While I thought I had provided a great answer to his question, and would surely be exalted as his favorite son-in-law, I failed to realize I had indirectly questioned his business acumen for his failure to understand and negotiate a more favorable contract.
Thankfully the insurance companies were his target for the evening, and he was quickly dismissive of my explanation. That, or since we often engage in the typical doctor versus lawyer banter (I never let him forget that while our profession was writing the Constitution, his was bloodletting George Washington), he simply did not want to acknowledge his lawyer son-in-law was right.
Having not learned my lesson from my interaction with my father-in-law, I again decided to jump into a conversation amongst my own aunts. During my family’s holiday gathering, I happen upon my aunts discussing the news story of the disgraced former Survivor contestant who was found in possession of child pornography. Yes, I live in the Midwest, and yes, Survivor is still a hit out here.
In any event, they could not comprehend why someone who is found with such damning evidence would even consider pleading not guilty. Surely getting caught red-handed would be enough to lock him up forever. As every gunner reading this article now is surely wanting to do, I jumped in and listed the many reasons one may wish to plead not guilty and went so far as to detail how some of the evidence may ultimately even be inadmissible.
Unbeknownst to me, my attempt at answering a rather simple question put me in the position of defending him in my aunts’ minds. After I repeatedly denounced his (alleged) actions and expressed confidence that justice would prevail, my aunts were satisfied and I quietly took my leave.
Thankfully I escaped the holidays with my familial relationships intact. No turkey was flung, and my father-in-law still gave me a generous present, but perhaps the best gift of all was knowing I should probably keep my unsolicited advice to myself for this weekend’s New Year’s parties. While free legal advice is apparently appreciated by family and friends, being your family’s gunner is not.
Stephen R. Williams is in-house counsel with a multi-facility hospital network in the Midwest. His column focuses on a little talked about area of the in-house life, management. You can reach Stephen at [email protected].