Trump Fires James Comey For Helping Trump Get Elected

I hope Comey's last employed words were: 'But her emails...'

(Getty Images)

(Getty Images)

We are beyond “epic” trolling, President Donald Trump has achieved ultimate troll status. Even when you answer Donald Trump’s questions correctly, Donald Trump doesn’t let you cross the bridge. Donald Trump eats you anyway.

F.B.I. director James Comey was fired today, on the recommendation of Attorney General Jeff Sessions — who has allegedly recused himself from the Russia investigation — and on the strength of Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein’s scathing letter about Comey’s performance.

Trump fires people investigating him with impunity. He fired Sally Yates. He fired Preet Bharara. He’s now fired James Comey. He’d fire the entire Congressional and Senate oversight committees if he could (stay tuned on that one, Augustus rolled the Roman Senate when he had to). Donald Trump is literally famous for firing people. It’s not surprising that the concept of “independent investigation” is foreign to him.

If you think Comey was fired for anything other than investigating the president and his people over their ties to Russia, you are a naive simpleton and I have no time for you.

But the stated reason for firing Comey is where the trolling comes in. Trump couldn’t say he fired James Comey for investigating the Trump administration. So instead, he said that he fired Comey for botching the Hillary Clinton email investigation.

Trump fired Comey for the reason he should have been fired, even though it wasn’t the reason he was fired. Trump isn’t smart, but he has brilliantly figured out that his most American media will flummox itself trying to explain that paradox.

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Nobody should defend James Comey. He tried to influence an American election, and succeeded! James Comey is as responsible for Trump being president as anything; even 538 has come around on that. James Comey will go down as the most infamous F.B.I. director since J. Edgar Hoover. F**k James Comey.

But her emails… are not the reason Jim Comey was fired. The emails are the foot massage of why Donald Trump just shoved Comey into a glass motherf**king house, f**king up the way the brother talks. Comey was fired for the audacity of investigating the dictator of the United States. Anybody currently still investigating the president should take note. ANYBODY appointed by Trump to replace Comey WILL TAKE NOTE.

In the wake of the news, Democrats rose, en masse, to demand a special prosecutor for the Russia investigation. Their point is made stronger today, not just because the director of the F.B.I. was fired, but because Jeff Sessions was on board. Sessions is supposed to be RECUSED from the Russia investigation. Surely that would include recusing himself from any advice as to whether the LEADER OF THE INVESTIGATION should keep his job.

Jeff Sessions is wholly incapable of running the Justice Department in a fair way. If people understood that, there’d be riots in the streets. Instead, we will have to settle for Democrats calling for a special prosecutor.

But Republicans have all the power, so only Republicans can appoint a special prosecutor. And given that Trump is willing to enact political or professional retribution against anybody who opposes him, I’m not sure how much of a backbone those Republican politicians really have.

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And so we are left with this… American tyranny. We have a strongman in charge, and nobody is willing or able to really stand up to him.

It is the victory of the troll. The troll puts you in a position where either you ignore him, or you violently fight back. But if you fight back, you go to jail and the troll just hops around talking about free speech. The troll wins, as long as you are paying attention to him.

Everyone is paying attention to Trump tonight. The President just shot the director of the F.B.I. in the middle of Fifth Avenue. The American people don’t have the stones to hold him accountable. He probably won’t even lose any support.

Justice isn’t blind, that bitch is dead.

F.B.I. Director James Comey Is Fired by Trump [New York Times]


Elie Mystal is an editor of Above the Law and the Legal Editor for More Perfect. He can be reached @ElieNYC on Twitter, or at elie@abovethelaw.com. He will resist.