Law Schools

Introverted Lawyers Need Their Voices To Be Heard

Introverts have the ability to change the legal profession for the better.

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We all have different reasons for why we decided to go to law school. I list just a few: to do good, to help others, to problem solve, to use as a stepping stone to something else, to make money, to stave off boredom while deciding what you really want to do when you grow up. The list is as varied as we are, although we are not nearly diverse enough, IMHO. Some of us went to law school for the intellectual stimulation, to read, to write, to think (of course many of us were naive enough to think that those skills would be what we could spend all our time doing as lawyers, another bubble burst).

Many of us wear masks. We find ourselves conflicted between our real personality types and the ones we have to don daily to do our jobs. It’s hard work to assume a personality type that is not you, that is not authentic or true to who you truly are. And therein lies the rub.

I wish that the book, The Introverted Lawyer by Heidi K. Brown, had been around when I started law school all those dinosaur years ago and certainly in the first decade or so of practice.  Those who are considering law school, those who are in it, as well as those who are practicing should read the book. I think it’s enormously helpful, especially for those who tend to self-criticism, who perseverate, who feel inadequate, who sense the need to chase perfection (and many seem to think that is what the profession demands).

The book helps to understand why many of us lawyers battle substance abuse, depression, and other illnesses. We are the only profession in which we are paid to be professionally adversarial. Other professions collaborate, but we don’t. And for those of us who are introverted (yes, that’s me), being outgoing, aggressive, voluble, and other similar traits are not authentic to us. Don’t get me started on the need to network to get business. If you are introverted like me, who is uncomfortable “tooting one’s horn” so to speak (and especially being brought up in the Midwest at a time when one did not talk about oneself), giving an elevator speech (gag) is one of life’s more painful moments.

I wish that we could/would ditch the term “networking.” It’s not really networking, but relationship building. Doesn’t that sound better and carry less of the stigma of “what’s in it for me”? Please make eye contact with the person who is the subject of your temporary relationship building. If it’s one-sided, it’s not a conversation, but a monologue. I only like comedians doing stand-ups.

There’s a lot of useful information in The Introverted Lawyer. I’d rather have two root canals at once than to have to “work a room,” so to speak, but law school and law practice push the extrovert model, especially nowadays in this “eat what you kill” world.

Heidi Brown, a lawyer, law professor, and introvert, candidly discussed her own issues with introversion. It’s hard enough being a lawyer and expected to cross swords verbally (hopefully no more than that) when your actual inclination is introversion. It’s not the same as shyness, Brown says. Introverts prefer solitary to social activities because that’s what they’d rather do. Shy people choose solitary activities out of fear or anxiety. How many of us have taken or are taking anxiety meds?

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We all have to be extroverted to one degree or another to do our jobs, but the problem becomes when our jobs create a sense of inauthenticity that we are not true to who we really are.  That leads to where we are now: rising rates of substance abuse, the panoply of mental health issues, and suicide.

Introverts, says Brown, may not engage in the verbal sparring that is so much a part of what so many lawyers do. They are quiet, not participating in the volleying talk of an extrovert, but when they have something to say, it’s usually worth listening to. They prefer writing to speaking. Quiet, methodical thinking is what lawyers do or what we used to do, until the clamor of technology ratcheted up so that there’s no longer any time for such thinking. Introverts may seem like they don’t catch on, but they do — their style is different.

Brown sets out a seven-point “journey toward authenticity and empowered advocacy” and provides a number of tips and exercises for the introvert to use both as a law student and in practice. Even after years in practice, lawyers who think that “they aren’t good enough,” that they have to be perfect in order to succeed, will find some good advice on how to handle depositions, conference calls, negotiations, court appearances, and other lawyerly activities without encountering flop sweat.

Many introverts have been told to be extroverts, which is antithetical to who they are.  “Get out there and network” or similar words. Any relationship to the various mental health and substance abuse issues that the profession has?

Some of you reading this may think that this is all “woo-woo,” that practicing law requires mental toughness, that the ability to survive the slings and arrows of practice does not allow for introverts. If approximately 60 percent of the “gifted” population is introverted, then they are all around you, down the hall, opposing you in a deposition, arguing motions, representing clients in negotiations, trying cases. Introverts are just as tough mentally and can survive whatever comes at them. They’re equal to the challenges of practice, they just approach them differently.

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However, Brown says introverts have the ability to change the profession for the better. The greater the number of quiet lawyers who live authentic lives, the healthier our profession will be. Let’s hear it for the introverts among us.

old lady lawyer elderly woman grandmother grandma laptop computerJill Switzer has been an active member of the State Bar of California for over 40 years. She remembers practicing law in a kinder, gentler time. She’s had a diverse legal career, including stints as a deputy district attorney, a solo practice, and several senior in-house gigs. She now mediates full-time, which gives her the opportunity to see dinosaurs, millennials, and those in-between interact — it’s not always civil. You can reach her by email at oldladylawyer@gmail.com.

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