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Emergency Motion To Get Donald Trump To Fix The Women's Soccer Case Because Seyfarth Shaw Sucks

RICO non-suave.

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(Photo by Maja Hitij/Getty Images)

Seyfarth Shaw wrote one of the worst motions of all time this month, explaining how women’s soccer players shouldn’t be paid men’s salaries because they get pregnant and stuff. It was a motion so bad it got the client fired, with U.S. Soccer president Carlos Cordeiro stepping down amid the uproar created by the filing. Given how this is playing out, it seems as though the women have got this covered, but a “private attorney general” is trying to elbow into the proceedings.

The gist of the motion is to get Donald Trump to focus on the national emergency Seyfarth Shaw has created with its brief:

This… isn’t a RICO thing, man.

The motion doesn’t make much sense seeing as it asks Trump to do something useful which is like asking Thailand to stop Alex Morgan. At least include a paragraph explaining how taking action makes money for his hotels or hurts Mitt Romney… something to get him interested.

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But while it’s easy to pick at the flaws in the filing, at least the guy’s heart is in the right place. Not everyone understands the legal system, but everyone should all be capable of grasping that Seyfarth Shaw’s motion was a clumsy extension of an ongoing effort of “Intimidation [and] Hostility” toward the players. It’s just a gussied-up retread of all the sad misogyny the players hear every time they have to talk about pay. It’s nice to know people out there are hearing the players.

That said, pro se folks have enough troubles getting their own cases handled… maybe steer clear of intervening in someone else’s.

But hey, this private attorney general hasn’t tried to suspend habeas corpus yet so he’s got one up on the real attorney general.

Earlier: U.S. Soccer HAS To Pay Men More, Because Playing For A Crowd Of Hooligans Is A Big ‘Responsibility’
When You Write A Brief So Bad It Gets The Client Fired

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HeadshotJoe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.

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