Government

House Goober Caucus Locked Out Of DC Jail Housing Rioter Pals

It can always get dumber, and it probably will.

By Liz Dye on July 30, 2021 3:45 pm

With all his various legal troubles, you’d think Rep. Matt Gaetz would stay as far away from jails as possible. And yet, there he was yesterday with Team Dipshit, demanding to be allowed in to see the Capitol Riot defendants held in a DC Metropolitan Correctional Facility.

Flanked by Reps. Marjorie Taylor Greene, Paul Gosar, and Louie Gohmert — the whole brain trust! — plus a One America News camera crew, Gaetz marched up to the door and asked to speak to the manager about the “political prisoners” being held in the facility.

Okay, Karen.

Here on Planet Earth, you can’t simply show up with a camera crew and demand to be taken on a tour of jail. No, not even if you are a member of congress with oversight over federal prisons, as Rep. Greene reminded the camera, insisting that she wasn’t trespassing at all.

Not to be out-dimwitted, Rep. Gohmert then insisted he had “top secret clearance” which entitled him to tour the facility at will. And Louie Gohmert may be a moron, but he was also a JAG attorney and a state judge back in Texas — so he knows damn well this is not how any of this works.

“The supervisor came down and was standing right here and turned her back on me,” he whined, adding later that “We’re in totalitarian, Marxist territory here. This is the way third-world people get treated.”

That’s a SPI-cy racism!

The Goober Caucus was at the jail to publicize the wingers’ latest attempt to rehabilitate the Capitol Rioters by claiming they’re being abused in jail. (See also: Ashli Babbit, American hero.) Defendant Ronald Sandlin represented to the court that a guard told him “I hate all white people and your honky religion.”

Which just sounds totally believable! Unfortunately, US District Judge Dabney Friedrich failed to be persuaded and denied Sandlin’s motion for bail.

In fact, the Capitol Riot defendants are being held in something approaching solitary confinement, as DC officials conceded months ago, telling US District Judge Royce Lamberth that this was necessary to protect them from possible assaults if housed with the general population. And considering that many of the rioters are associated with racist groups such as the Proud Boys, that’s probably a safe bet.

In the case of Lisa Eisenhart who participated in the riot along with her son Eric “Zip Tie Guy” Munchel, Judge Lamberth noted the high degree of deference accorded to prison officials when he refused the defendant’s plea to be placed in gen-pop. But, he wrote, “in this case, the Department of Corrections would prevail even without deference. Its articulated concern for the safety of the defendant and of other detainees clearly provides a rational basis for the defendant’s placement. Thus, the Court must conclude that the defendant has not raised a cognizable violation of the Due Process Clause.”

Allegations that the January 6 defendants are being abused by jail staff have thus far not been substantiated. But don’t worry, because Team Kraken is on it. And even the squidlets know you can’t just barge into a correctional facility and demand to see people who aren’t your client.

“[T]hese officials compromised safety and security operations at the DOC,” a spokesperson for the jail told The Hill. “Safety and security related to DOC’s facilities, staff and residents is a high priority and for that reason DOC has established procedures and protocols related to visits to its facilities. All visitors, which includes family members of residents, attorneys, and public officials, must adhere to the rules and procedures of the DOC.”

Or, as William and Mary Law’s most honored alum put it, “What is Attorney General Merrick Garland hiding?”

And then all the Goobers rushed back to the office to raise more campaign cash off their little stunt. Third verse, same as the first.

Gaetz, Greene and Gohmert turned away from jail to visit Jan. 6 defendants [The Hill]

Elizabeth Dye lives in Baltimore where she writes about law and politics.