In-House Counsel

The Superpower Of Listening

Listening may not seem very powerful, but at least in-house, it is a core competency.

By Meyling "Mey" Ly Ortiz on August 12, 2021 11:43 am

Lawyers often get a bad rap for talking too much, allegedly about ourselves or our cases or how much we know. War stories, anyone? Maybe that reputation is earned for firm lawyers and from the billable hour model and the joke that they bill by the word count. But what I’ve found to be a superpower in-house is the underrated but very powerful skill of listening.

Listening may not seem very powerful, but I submit to you that at least in-house, it is a core competency. While lawyers may have different styles, I have keenly observed that those who have mastered the art of listening are well-respected and well-liked (those are two different things) and tend to have strong relationships with their clients.

And it makes sense because when you listen and are present with clients, you are able to build trust and rapport. Instead of coming in as the know-it-all lawyer who starts dispensing advice without all the facts (because you presume you’ve seen it before and know what they’re asking), you allow the client space to share what they believe is important about the situation, and if you are in a group meeting, you give the speaker the opportunity to show their competence and all the work they’ve already put in.

If you interrupt too soon to ask questions, you may be met with a “I was going to get to that” which can harm the relationship (and make you look like a know-it-all-lawyer who can’t help but talk). If you interrupt too soon to rush to problem-solve, you may inadvertently make the client feel less than for coming to you when it was so “obvious” or a “dumb question,” even if you actually do solve the problem.

So listen. Make eye contact and use responsive nods or appear pensive as appropriate. And take notes.

Besides relationship-building, listening is key to getting all the relevant facts to assess the situation and spot legal issues. And before you call me Captain Obvious, listening also gives you the opportunity to use your lawyer Spidey-sense to observe the room and listen for what may be felt but unsaid. What’s key to this level of listening is that you are listening to understand — and not listening just to respond (which requires you to think about what you’re going to say instead of really listening).

Here, if you interrupt too soon to rush to problem-solve, without getting your client’s lay of the land, you run the risk of the embarrassment of solving a problem no one actually has. I have actually seen that — where the client says, “that’s not what we were going ask; we already know that.” If you interrupt too soon, you may also miss pertinent facts — or even more importantly, you may miss out on understanding why they are important to the client, even if the facts are not actually germane to the legal situation. That’s a whole different level of listening — when you are listening for the why or why not, your client’s motivation, their risk tolerance, and desired outcome — beyond the usual what, where, when, and how.

Listening is a basic skill, but with practice and intentionality, it can be a superpower.

Meyling “Mey” Ly Ortiz is in-house at Toyota Motor North America. Her passions include mentoring, championing belonging, and a personal blog: TheMeybe.com. At home, you can find her doing her best to be a “fun” mom to a toddler and preschooler and chasing her best self on her Peloton. You can follow her on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/meybe/). And you knew this was coming: her opinions are hers alone.