Pillow Puffer Invites YOU, YES YOU To Sign His Petition To SCOTUS

Never get high on your own supply.

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(Photo by JIM WATSON/AFP via Getty Images)

Look out, SCOTUS, Mike Lindell’s crashing your party! And he’s bringing some state attorney general as his date. ALLEGEDLY.

The MyPillow CEO has been promising for months that Trump will be reinstated once the justices get wind of his superduper amazing evidence of Chinese election hacking. Never mind that Lindell’s own “cyber expert” described that evidence as “a turd.” And let’s not dwell on earlier predictions that the Supreme Court would unanimously “pull down this election” in August after the Cyber Pillowpallooza in South Dakota. Lindell is sure that restoration is right around the corner … probably.

Although, of late, he’s started to hedge his bets and is now promising just to file his suit with the Supreme Court by Thanksgiving. All he needs is one state attorney general to sign on, then he can get that sweet sweet original SCOTUS jurisdiction for this mountain of Chinese router–packet capture–non-existent IP address argle bargle.

He’s not saying yet which AG wants to ruin himself with this nonsense — “I’m not going to sit here — the leftwing media will be calling me up, ‘Who’s all on board?’” — but he’s promising a good crowd for his “quo warranto” action. You bet!

In the meantime, patriots, Mike Lindell needs your help. To persuade the Supreme Court to take this extremely serious lawsuit, he needs you to head on over to Fix2020First dot com and sign this petition with your name, email, and phone number “to encourage the Supreme Court to accept the bill of complaint brought by patriotic states to save our country.”

No, you can’t see the bill of complaint. Or know which states are on it. But you can and should give the pillow salesman your contact info TODAY.

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And if you’re still uncertain, he’s included a video to convince you.

“Hello, I’m Mike Lindell, and as you know, I was brought cyberforensic evidence back on January 9th that 100 percent proves and validates everything that happened in the 2020 election,” he begins, somewhat incongruously.

Explaining that he has “evidence that China was also involved in this historical crime against our country” he warns of a dire future where we “lose our country and our freedoms forever” if we don’t “fix 2020 first and get rid of the machines.”

“I believe that the nine Supreme Court Justices who are there to protect our country will vote nine to zero to accept this case. Now you can help,” he continues, before urging his listeners to hand over their deets.

Later he continues the pitch on LindellTV, which exists for some reason.

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“As we get closer to Thanksgiving, we gotta get this petition filled up,” he vamped. “I’d like to get 200 million people on it, and that should be pretty easy. You’ve got, you know, if you’re a family member, you go get your other family members to do it. Get your neighbors to do it. This will be out by the end of the week.”

Which is some loaves and fishes magic, considering there are only 330 million people in the entire country. But no matter! Mike Lindell knows it can be done, and that it will be entirely persuasive to the court, and that many many AGs will have his back.

Which is exactly how all of this works.

Elizabeth Dye lives in Baltimore where she writes about law and politics.

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