
(Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)
Today is April Fools’ Day, which, honestly is a terrible day to be on the internet with all the unfunny pranks coming out of the woodwork. But there’s another reason to hate the day: it’s Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito’s birthday. The justice turns 74 today, which is as good a reminder as any how important the 2024 election is.
Because the internet is undefeated, the occasion of Alito’s birthday has been transformed into an opportunity to roast the justice. In fairness, he gives the world plenty of ammunition. His unique brand of mean-spirited jurisprudence has fueled a thread by Professor Melissa Murray of all the times Alito has used his power on the Court as a weapon to burnish against his enemies.

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In honor of his birthday, some of Justice Alito's greatest hits…. https://t.co/VakaVDkdoo
— Melissa Murray (@ProfMMurray on Threads 🧵) (@ProfMMurray) April 1, 2024
While others have opted for the simple — but effective — burn.
Reading the Hobby Lobby decision again today and am in total awe of Sam Alito's writing– one of the greatest legal minds we've had on the Supreme Court.
— Anthony Michael Kreis (@AnthonyMKreis) April 1, 2024

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I loved how Scalia eloquently explained the evolution of his position from Employment Division to Hobby Lobby. A real titan wrestling with difficult issues in good faith.
— Elie Mystal (@ElieNYC) April 1, 2024
April 1 Birthdays:
Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is 74.
It's reported that Alito will celebrate the day by binge-watching 'The Handmaid's Tale', which the associate justice considers a romantic comedy. pic.twitter.com/O6krkyT5N1
— Bob Geiger (@GeigerNews) April 1, 2024
I loved the part where he said the required substantial burden is the penalty not the actual burden on religious exercise. Absurd.
This is sarcasm not April fools though it was the most foolish of decisions.— Eric Segall (@espinsegall) April 1, 2024
@plsgetserious @TrueFactsStated
Today, April 1st or April Fool's Day is Samuel Alito's birthday.
Which explains his judicial philosophy perfectly.
— Wayne Wilson (@WilsonT20237575) April 1, 2024
According to a Google search, Samuel Alito's birthday is today, April 1st. April Fool's day.
You gotta give it to his parents for playing the greatest April Fool's joke on America. Bless them.— Jack Adler (@jackiadler84) April 1, 2024
All in all a fitting tribute for the justice.
Kathryn Rubino is a Senior Editor at Above the Law, host of The Jabot podcast, and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. AtL tipsters are the best, so please connect with her. Feel free to email her with any tips, questions, or comments and follow her on Twitter @Kathryn1 or Mastodon @[email protected].