7th Circuit

Setting a trap for the rats infesting his docket.

Judge Richard Posner is the Republican-appointed judge we need on the Supreme Court. He may not be the one we deserve, and will almost certainly not be the one we get, but it is fun to imagine.

The benchslaps are fun, but the debate is real and important.

Judge Posner looks over the legal landscape and delivers his verdict.

* Morgan Lewis approves the Bingham deal, with 227 of the roughly 300 Bingham partners moving over as full partners. Morgan Lewis is calling it a “mass lateral move,” which is the nice way of telling the remaining 70+ partners (and whatever associates and staffers they don’t care to include) to enjoy early retirement. [American Lawyer; WSJ Law Blog]

* A follow up report on the horrific story of the lawyers accused of stabbing a managing partner and his wife. [Washington Post]

* Justice Scalia realizes that strict constructionists are just jerks. [The Onion]

* When the title of the story uses the phrase “super-drunk judge”… [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]

* Judge Posner took a detour into Jewish theology, apparently based on scholarly research from “Google” and “Wikipedia.” In his defense though, he thought he was citing the well-known Hebrew texts of “Elgoog” and “Aidepikiw.” [The Jewish Daily Forward]

* It may sound like a terrible horror movie, but “Darkhotel” is actually a campaign of cyberattacks against business executives logging in from their high-end hotels. [Internet, Information Technology & e-Discovery Blog]

* Um, Florida State may care so much about their (number 3) football team they gloss over criminal activity. And this article is NOT about Jameis Winston. [New York Times]

* Linda Greenhouse. Damn. “In decades of court-watching, I have struggled — sometimes it has seemed against all odds — to maintain the belief that the Supreme Court really is a court and not just a collection of politicians in robes. This past week, I’ve found myself struggling against the impulse to say two words: I surrender.” [New York Times]

* If you’re in L.A. tonight, check out the 6th Annual Justice Jam, celebrating “A Tradition of Advocacy” at 5:30 p.m. at La Plaza De Cultura y Artes. The event benefits Community Lawyers, Inc., an organization working to promote access to affordable legal services for low- and moderate-income individuals. [Community Lawyers, Inc.]

Another way the "War on Drugs" makes drug dealers more powerful.

Judge Posner channels Mr. Spock: "So [your client] is not logical, you're saying."

* A unanimous Seventh Circuit panel, in an opinion by Judge Posner, just struck down Wisconsin and Indiana’s bans on same-sex marriage. The result isn’t surprising in light of the blistering benchslaps delivered by Judge Posner at oral argument, but the timing is faster than usual (for a federal appellate opinion in a high-profile case, not for the prolific Posner). [BuzzFeed]

* Bad news for Cahill Gordon: the Third Circuit just revived a fraud case against the high-powered firm and one of its clients, a unit of BASF. [WSJ Law Blog]

* And badder news for BP: a federal judge just concluded that the oil giant was grossly negligent in connection with the 2010 Gulf of Mexico oil spill. [New York Times]

* Freshfields gets fresh talent, adding former Wachtell partner Mitchell Presser and former Skadden partner James Douglas to its ranks. [American Lawyer]

* The dean of Seton Hall Law, Patrick Hobbs, will step down from the deanship at the end of the current academic year. Congratulations to Dean Hobbs on a long and successful tenure. [South Orange Juice]

* And congratulations to John Grisham and Jason Bailey, winners of, respectively, the 2014 Harper Lee Prize for Legal Fiction and the 2014 ABA Journal/Ross Short Fiction Contest. [ABA Journal]

* Brittany McGrath, Brooklyn Law class of 2014, RIP. [TaxProf Blog]

Judge Posner didn't go easy on lawyers trying to defend the Indiana and Wisconsin bans on same-sex marriage.

* Judge Posner dished out a whole lot of benchslaps at yesterday’s Seventh Circuit arguments over Indiana and Wisconsin’s bans on same-sex marriage. [BuzzFeed]

* Major U.S. and Canadian law firms chow down on Burger King’s whopper of a deal with Tim Hortons. [Am Law Daily]

* A recent Delaware court ruling on attorney-client privilege might allow in-house lawyers to speak more freely about wrongdoing at their companies, according to Professor Steven Davidoff Solomon. [DealBook / New York Times]

* The corruption trial of former Virginia governor continues; yesterday Bob McDonnell’s sister took the stand. [Washington Post]

* A favorable evidentiary ruling for Aaron Hernandez. [Fox Sports]

* And good news for Zephyr Teachout and Tim Wu, the two law professors running for governor and lieutenant governor of New York: the Times dissed their opponent, Andrew Cuomo, with a non-endorsement. [New York Times]

* I recently spoke with one of my cousins Joao Atienza of the Cebu Sun Star, about Above the Law and the world of legal blogging. [Cebu Sun Star]

Opinions get redacted or sealed all the time, but the latest from the Seventh Circuit is a doozy....

You've angered Judge Richard Posner terribly. Not a good idea.

Judge Posner levels a benchslap on a litigious piece of fruit.

You might be charged with a crime if your money smells bad.

In the real world, nobody gives a damn about your allergies or stomach flu.

When a federal judge uses the word "pathetic" to describe anything about you, you know you're in trouble.

When is this federal appellate judge stepping down, and what will he do next?

Isn't this oral argument painful to listen to?

* O.J. Simpson is pursuing a hunger strike because he’s looking to die. If only he knew who the real killers were, they could help him out. [Radar Online] * Dean I. Richard Gershon of Ole Miss Law thinks Elie is just wrong. [Law Deans on Legal Education Blog] * In continuing Seventh Circuit benchslappiness, Judge Richard Posner got feisty with an attorney for Notre Dame who kept interrupting him. If this lawyer keeps it up, Posner’s going to treat his client like Alabama did a year ago. [Chicago Tribune] * Comcast wants to buy Time Warner, pending DOJ approval. The DOJ wants to talk to Comcast, but they’re only available to talk between 10 and 10:15 on alternating Wednesdays. [ATL Redline] * California and New Jersey have banned gay conversion therapy programs. Is that the best way to combat these schemes? [New York Times] * A look at getting started as an entrepreneur. See, there’s hope after bailing on practicing law. [Big Law Rebel] * Daria Roithmayr of USC Law thinks The Triple Package (affiliate link), the new book by Yale’s Amy Chua and Jed Rubenfeld, doesn’t hold water. I mean, since when are we holding academics to writing “scholarship” as opposed to “controversy bait”? Professors need to eat, after all. [Slate] * A cop who got in trouble for bashing Obama online thought he was protected by the First Amendment. The court disagreed. [IT-Lex]

How often can you get benchslapped before you get disbarred? One lawyer's trying to find out.