American Constitution Society (ACS)

American Constitution Society (ACS)

Non-Sequiturs: 09.13.13

* A lawyer fresh out of law school botched a domestic violence case by gushing all over Tom Hanks… who was serving as a juror. Which, in fairness, was awfully Big of him. [TMZ] * Federal prosecutors are seeking at least 27 years in prison for a Massachusetts man who authorities say plotted to kill and eat his children based on a search of his home and car, which is presumably a Saturn. As one law professor observed, “Perhaps the lawyer will make a free exercise argument and claim that eating children is a requirement of his religion.” [CNN] * If you’re going to drink and drive, be sure to toss a few back with the judge first. [KVUE] * A criminal defense lawyer who begins every cross by making the cop look more humane and respectable. I thought the public defender from My Cousin Vinny was the lowest criminal defense could go in the comical incompetence department. [Katz Justice] * Putin crony claims 100 percent of profits in a “public” oil company by flat ignoring minority shareholders. Shhhh! Stop giving Exxon ideas. [Breaking Energy] * Elizabeth Wurtzel knows music (a subject she covered for the New Yorker for New York Magazine). In this article, she writes about The Replacements (something Wurtzel has made her past employers, including Boies Schiller, become familiar with). [The Daily Beast] * On Monday, the American Constitution Society will host a preview of the upcoming Supreme Court session. Panelists include Pamela Harris, Randy Barnett, Joshua Civin, Andrew Pincus, and David Strauss. [American Constitution Society] * Then next Tuesday, The Cato Institute’s Center for Constitutional Studies will host a symposium titled “The Supreme Court: Past and Prologue: A Look at the October 2012 and 2013 Terms.” Panelists include Tom Goldstein, Marcia Coyle, and Howard Bashman. [How Appealing]

By Joe Patrice
American Constitution Society (ACS)

Non-Sequiturs: 06.12.12

* What price can you put on freedom (or lack thereof)? Jeffrey Deskovic, who served 16 years in prison for a rape and murder he did not commit, sued a whole host of defendants after his exoneration — and won more than $5 million. [Cruel and Unusual] * One way of dealing with opposing counsel is to grope them and expose yourself to them. I didn’t say it was a “good” was to deal with opposing counsel. [New York Personal Injury Law Blog] * George Zimmerman’s wife was arrested for perjury. Good thing she wasn’t wearing a hoodie while she allegedly lied, ’cause you know how that goes. [Orlando Sentinel] * When studying for the bar, you have to at least pretend that there’s going to be a job afterwards. Don’t torture yourself with reality. [Law Riot] * As a boy with a girl’s name, I’m always worried that something like this will happen to me. Trust me, my son will not have this problem. I’ll call the kid Mars Glock The Penismightier Mystal or something. [The Daily Dolt] * Is the NFL going to end up like Big Tobacco? [Forbes] * I’ll be moderating a panel at this year’s American Constitution Society National Convention. That means I’m coming to D.C.! If you want to hang out, I’ll be drinking with Marin at Off the Record — which is downstairs at the Hay-Adams — starting at about 8:30 tomorrow night. [American Constitution Society]

By Elie Mystal
11th Circuit

Non-Sequiturs: 10.06.11

* Saying your dog ate something isn’t a creative enough excuse these days. Try this instead: “I kept the clients’ missing money in my car, which I left running in the parking lot to keep my dead dog’s ashes from freezing. Someone then stole the car, and now the missing client money is gone forever!” […]

By Elie Mystal & Staci Zaretsky
11th Circuit

Non-Sequiturs: 10.06.11

* Saying your dog ate something isn’t a creative enough excuse these days. Try this instead: “I kept the clients’ missing money in my car, which I left running in the parking lot to keep my dead dog’s ashes from freezing. Someone then stole the car, and now the missing client money is gone forever!” […]

By Elie Mystal & Staci Zaretsky
American Constitution Society (ACS)

Non-Sequiturs: 08.26.11

* What can law firms learn from Folgers crystals? Maybe how to provide legal services rich enough to be served to America’s finest corporations. [What About Clients?] * A look at what $100,000 in law school loans could have purchased instead — e.g., 505,050 chicken nuggets from Wendy’s. [Constitutional Daily] * What kind of “reasonable […]

By David Lat