Certiorari

* In case you missed President Trump’s wall speech, he stopped short of declaring a national emergency at the border (lost that bet), instead referring to the situation as a “growing humanitarian crisis” — a “manufactured” one, per Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer. [USA Today]

* Remember the contempt order against a state-owned foreign corporation that Chief Justice Roberts stayed in the Mueller probe? The Supreme Court restored it, and that company filed for cert under seal. Suspense! [National Law Journal]

* Speaking of the Mueller investigation, Deputy AG Rod Rosenstein, who has been overseeing the probe more or less since it began, is planning to quit his job in the coming weeks after William Barr is confirmed as the new attorney general. [ABC News]

* “I don’t want to speculate about her health, but it doesn’t seem like a good sign.” Justice Ginsburg missed oral arguments two days in a row, which has prompted much concern about her well-being. Please stay strong, RBG. We need you! [The Hill]

* Justice Kavanaugh released his very first decision, and in keeping with legendary SCOTUS tradition, it looks like he was assigned an easy-peasy, “one-issue, unanimous opinion to write.” One down, and only a countless number to go. [Big Law Business]

* Puff, puff, pass along your résumé: Biglaw behemoth Dentons recently poached a partner from Jones Day to run its marijuana practice, and he’s hiring people who want to work for the “number one firm” in the cannabis industry. [Business Insider]

* Law students are being screwed by the government shutdown. Students who were supposed to extern at federal agencies may have to go without these “huge components on their résumé,” and that’s got to be a horrible experience. [Law.com]

Check out this very interesting cert petition, just filed by Paul Clement.

* Lawyers for Brendan Dassey of Making a Murderer have filed a writ of certiorari, asking the Supreme Court to review a decision made by the en banc Seventh Circuit that upheld his conviction for murder. Earlier, a federal magistrate overturned his conviction and a panel of the Seventh Circuit affirmed. This is totally going to be in the show’s sequel. [ABC 2 WBAY]

* A step in the right direction for gun control? During a Medal of Valor ceremony at the White House, President Trump announced that he’d directed Attorney General Jeff Sessions to draft regulations that would effectively ban the use of bump stocks. Now we’ll just wait a few months to see some action on AR-15s… [USA Today]

* Could it be? Could Justice Neil Gorsuch be on your side when it comes to privacy? Believe it or not, “[h]e may even become the Supreme Court’s next swing vote on Fourth Amendment issues,” and this term he’ll have more than an ample opportunity to swing on the issues of digital privacy and police search warrants. [VICE News]

* If you thought you couldn’t get rid of your student loans in bankruptcy, you were likely be right, but that could change. The Trump administration is looking into what it takes for borrowers to meet the “undue hardship” threshold for the discharge of federal loans in bankruptcy, and may clarify the standard. [Wall Street Journal]

* In perhaps the best student event ever, Howard Law rented out an entire movie theater so that students, faculty, staff, and alumni could see an opening-night screening of Black Panther. The school’s SBA co-hosted the awesomeness with Georgetown Law’s Black Law Students Association. Congratulations! [Law.com]

* Everyone in the Trump administration who is in some way related to the Russia probe has now lawyered up with outside counsel, including the attorney general. AG Jeff Sessions is being represented by Chuck Cooper, a longtime champion of conservative causes. If you recall, Cooper also prepped Sessions for his confirmation hearing. [USA Today]

* Let’s not go crazy: Earlier this week, the Electronic Frontier Foundation and outside counsel Keker & Van Nest were denied certiorari on the Lenz v. Universal Music case — perhaps better known as the “dancing baby” case. Thanks to the SCOTUS decision, or lack thereof, we’ll not know “whether or not the DMCA includes meaningful protections for online fair uses” anytime soon. [Law.com]

* Judge Gonzalo Curiel will not make a Trump University settlement objector post a $146,888 bond to pursue an appeal. Sherri Simpson, a Florida bankruptcy lawyer, paid $19,000 for Trump U. seminars and mentorship, but now she wants out so she can sue the president over the alleged fraud. [POLITICO]

* Concerned Veterans for America, a political action committee that’s funded by the Koch brothers, is running an ad in support of a Penn Law Professor Stephanos Bibas’s nomination to the Third Circuit. “Generally a candidate would have to be pretty inflammatory or at risk to justify this kind of spending,” said election law attorney Adam Bonin. [Legal Intelligencer via ABA Journal]

* UNC Law’s budget has officially been cut by the state Senate, but it’s not as bad as the $4 million budget buster that was previously proposed. The law school will have to do without $500K in state appropriations if the legislature approves the move. Yes, that’s the sound of your tuition going up. [News & Observer]

Ed. Note: We will not be publishing on Monday, January 16th in observation of Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Hope everyone enjoys their long weekend.

* A primer for how the Democrats can play hardball with Trump’s SCOTUS pick. [Slate]

* You too can learn to say NO! And here are some tips to do it. [Andie and Al]

* A working phone number can have a tremendous impact on your law practice. [Reboot Your Law Practice]

* The Trump conflicts are piling up. [American Constitution Society]

* Why federal inmates deserve a second chance. [The Hill]

* Does when you file a cert petition impact whether it’s granted? [Empirical SCOTUS]

* Superfans of Seinfeld will remember the Michigan bottle scam, wherein Kramer and Newman try to return bottles to Michigan for the 10 cent deposit. Apparently, that’s a felony punishable by up to 5 years in prison, as this poor sap is learning the hard way. [11 Points]

* Intelligence Squared is circulating a petition to fix the presidential debate. They want to see robust policy discussions not gotcha questions… maybe this’d work if Donald Trump weren’t one of the candidates. [Change.org]

* You need to take care of yourself in order to fight the legal battles that need to be fought. [Katz Justice]

* Now that the D.C. Circuit has upheld the FCC’s right to enforce net neutrality, what will the Supreme Court do about it? [Slate]

* Has the fact that there are only 8 justices on the Supreme Court affected its cert rate? [Empirical SCOTUS]

* U.S. District Judge David Godbey ruled, no, Texas, you can’t sue the federal government over Syrian refugees. [Huffington Post]

* ABC News chief legal analyst Dan Abrams is suing his neighbors over his lawyerly lair — and one of the defendants is a Biglaw partner at a top firm. Expect more on this later. [New York Post]

* Speaking of Biglaw, a familiar tale of financial performance: gross revenue at Am Law 100 firms grew by 4 percent in the first half of 2015, but driven by rate increases rather than demand growth. [American Lawyer]

* If you want the Supreme Court to hear your case, try to steer your cert petition clear of the “long conference,” known as the place “where petitions go to die.” [New York Times]

* Speaking of SCOTUS, the Court won’t come to the rescue of the Kentucky county clerk who refuses to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples — time to issue those licenses or quit, Kim Davis. [How Appealing]

* But the justices did come to the (temporary) rescue of former Virginia Governor Robert McDonnell, allowing him to remain free until SCOTUS acts on his petition for certiorari. [SCOTUSblog via How Appealing]

* Are criticisms of the S.E.C.’s administrative-law procedures correct? Here’s a study from Professor David Zaring. [New York Times]

* The Show-Me State leads when it comes to showing defendants to their deaths: Missouri has displaced Texas as the “epicenter of the American death penalty.” [The Marshall Project]

* Speaking of capital punishment, I predicted that these particular Ninth Circuit judges wouldn’t be too sympathetic to this challenge to the death penalty — and based on yesterday’s oral argument, it seems I was right. [How Appealing]

What was this partner thinking when he filed this off-the-wall petition with the Supreme Court?

Could the third time be the charm? Today, the U.S. Supreme Court granted the petition for certiorari filed in May 2014 by the Texas Department of Housing and Community Affairs (Texas DHCA) in Texas Department of Housing and Community Affairs v. The Inclusive Communities Project, Inc. The case gives the Supreme Court its third opportunity since 2012 to rule on the issue of whether disparate impact claims are cognizable under the Fair Housing Act. The prior two cases, Twp. Of Mount Holly v. Mt. Holly Gardens Citizens in Action, Inc. and Magner v. Gallagher, were both settled after the completion of briefing but before the Court could hear oral argument and answer the question presented. This time around the Court granted the certiorari petition without first soliciting the views of the Solicitor General.

* With OT 2013 drawing to a close, here’s a nifty chart that shows which Supreme Court justices vote together most and least often. The division is real, people. [The Upshot / New York Times]

* “Not only do they have unique interpretations of the Constitution but they can’t even agree on how to pronounce words.” Listen to our SCOTUS justices flub the word “certiorari.” [Legal Times]

* Quinn Emanuel and Samsung must now pay more than $2M in sanctions to Nokia and Apple after leaking confidential, “attorneys’ eyes only” information in a discovery blunder. Oopsie! [Legal Week]

* “Why can’t you get a real job?” This judge — the same one who sentenced a rapist to just 30 days in prison — told a fast-food worker to get a better job to pay off his restitution more quickly. [Billings Gazette]

* If you think you’ve seen the best of the “Law and ______” classes, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Say hello to some newcomers, like Video Game Law and Law of Robots. Justice Scalia is pissed. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Judges with daughters are seven percent more likely to support women’s rights than judges with only sons. Alas, Justices Scalia and Alito are impervious to human emotion. [New York Times]

* If you thought Supreme Court justices were “profoundly divided” over issues of law, wait until you see how they differ over the pronunciation of the word “certiorari.” [National Law Journal]

* This year’s summer associate programs sound pretty lame compared to the past: “The emphasis is certainly more on the work than it is on the social events.” All work and no play makes Jack an employed boy at graduation. [Boston Business Journal]

* “I saved the internet today. Your freedom continues.” Fair assessment. Sarah Jones’s win in her defamation case against Nik Richie and TheDirty.com was overturned by the Sixth Circuit. [Courier-Journal]

* If you’re choosing to go against the president’s wishes and apply to law school, here’s how you can leverage your major on all of your applications. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* This cowgirl is putting aside her rodeo accomplishments to go to law school. At least she’ll have the experience needed to ride the bucking bronco of the post-recession job market. [Casper Star-Tribune]

Who is the latest legal eagle to feather her nest at the elite litigation firm?

Justice Sotomayor is generally very nice, but don't get her angry. A federal prosecutor in Texas who made improper, racially charged remarks during a trial learned this the hard way.

Are the gay marriage cases currently before the Supreme Court all mistakes?

* “Did the imperative use of the F-bomb … threaten judicial authority?” Wow, seriously? This is perhaps the most entertaining question presented for review in a Supreme Court certiorari petition in the history of man. [National Law Journal]

* Boy, Dewey have some expensive paintings for you to buy! This failed firm’s art collection will be hitting the auction block in February, and the entire LeBoeuf lot is supposedly worth $2.3M, but most pieces are pretty damn ugly. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

* When anonymous commenting goes wronger-er: Jim Letten, U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of Louisiana, has resigned amid the scandal caused by his underlings’ obnoxious comments. [Times-Picayune]

* Your employers really don’t want pictures of your office holiday party antics going viral online (but we do). Here are some of the many ways they’ll try to keep you from becoming internet famous. [Corporate Counsel]

* George Zimmerman, the man accused of killing Trayvon Martin, is suing NBCUniversal, alleging that the network and Today show reporters committed serious “journalistic crimes.” [Media Decoder / New York Times]

* Dewey know how many professional services firms it takes to wind down a Biglaw firm? According to new D&L bankruptcy filings, there are at least eight of them — including Togut Segal & Segal, a leading law firm that reportedly charges $935 an hour. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Despite Barack Obama’s pledge of support, Brett McGurk has withdrawn his name from the White House pool of ambassadorial candidates amid much salacious controversy. Apparently this man knows a lost cause when he sees one. [Washington Post]

* So many DOMA lawsuits, so little time: what’s happening in the six major cases on this statute? The majority are in various stages of appeal, and the world at large is currently awaiting a cert filing to get a final take from the Supreme Court. [Poliglot / Metro Weekly]

* LSAC will now vet incoming law students’ GPAs and LSAT scores. The ABA won’t do it because they need the insurance policy of someone else to blame in case something happens to go wrong. [National Law Journal]

* Oh, my sweet little Mittens, you’re making it really hard for moderates like me to consider voting for you in November. Protip: you went to law school, so you should probably stop telling people that you didn’t. [Ology]

* Stephen McDaniel’s lawyers are expected to ask a judge to reconsider his $850K bond today. If he’s released, it seems like there’s a high probability that he’ll become an ATL commenter. [Macon Telegraph]

* Remember the legal fight over the Tyrannosaurus bataar? Well, now Preet Bharara, the U.S. Attorney for the S.D.N.Y., is on the case, and he wants to be seized for return to Jurassic Park Mongolia. [New York Observer]

Last year, the Fifth Circuit upheld the University of Texas's affirmative action plan in Fisher v. University of Texas. But they did so in a petulant, childish manner, as if somebody was forcing them to eat their vegetables. At the time, Elie said they were openly begging for a right-wing Supreme Court to review and overturn their ruling. It looks like the members of the Fifth Circuit are going to get their wish. The Supreme Court granted cert on Fisher, and now we get to have an affirmative action debate right in the middle of an election cycle where a black man is running for reelection....

* With yesterday’s decision from Pennsylvania, the game is now tied for Obamacare at the federal district court level. Come on, SCOTUS, just grant someone certiorari already. [Bloomberg] * Keep this in mind if you’re applying to law school this year: if you’re white, it ain’t aight. Who knew that there could be “anti-white bias” […]

The confirmation hearings for Solicitor General Elena Kagan, nominated to replace Justice John Paul Stevens on the Supreme Court, are currently scheduled to start on Monday, June 28. We will, of course, offer extensive coverage, including some liveblogging. But most observers expect little confirmation drama — which makes sense. Elena Kagan is an eminently qualified […]