Steven Donziger

The most disturbing part is when you wonder about WHY they didn't get any liberal backup.

The judge does not seem pleased.

Plus other notable legal news from the week that was.

* Michael Cohen, President Trump’s former attorney, will finally be released today from prison to serve the rest of his sentence at home. His situation is not unlike many Americans right now. [BBC]

* Environmental lawyer Steven Donziger has been ordered to continue his home confinement pending a contempt of court trial in September. Again, less of a burden given the current environment. [Intercept]

* A New York lawyer who forgot to attend oral arguments has been forced to pay his adversary’s costs for coming to the courthouse. [ABA Journal]

* The College Board is facing a class action lawsuit over glitches with online Advanced Placement exams. [Washington Post]

* An Ohio lawyer has been suspended for a number of ethical violations, including offering a client a Xanax. [Bloomberg Law]

* Kendall Jenner has agreed to pay $90,000 because of her promotion of the ill-fated Fyre Festival. If you haven’t seen the documentaries about this dumpster fire of an event, check them out! [Page Six]

* Did Chief Justice Roy Moore of the Alabama Supreme Court commit judicial misconduct when he instructed probate judges that the state’s same-sex marriage ban was still in effect despite the Supreme Court’s decision in Obergefell? The state’s Court of the Judiciary has set a date for a trial-like proceeding on the ethics charges Moore faces for late September. [ABC News]

* If you want to go to law school and you’ve got your heart set on a particular institution, it may be in your best financial interests to apply early decision. A few law schools are now offering significant scholarship opportunities to early applicants — in some cases, full tuition scholarships are being handed out. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

* “Even innocent clients may not benefit from the fraud of their attorney.” Chevron Corp. has prevailed in a long-running environmental law case set in an Ecuadorian rainforest. Lawyers for the oil and gas company convinced the Second Circuit that an $8.65 billion judgment was obtained through attorney Steven Donziger’s bribery and fraud. [Reuters]

* The family of slain Florida State law professor Dan Markel has accepted a $40,000 settlement from the Consolidated Dispatch Agency in connection with a wrongful death case. Due to an “error by dispatchers,” it took approximately 19 minutes for ambulances to arrive at Markel’s home as he lay dying after being shot. [Tallahassee Democrat]

* This is why indebted law students can’t have nice things: while the American Bar Association may have changed its tune when it comes to law students earning pay for credit-bearing externships, it will allow law schools to be the ultimate arbiters on whether academic credit will still be offered for these job placements. [Law.com]

* “The top is eroding and the bottom is growing.” Even as class sizes get smaller and tuition gets lower, the law school brain drain continues. America’s best and brightest won’t be fooled into studying law when the job market is still so unstable, but others have been. [Bloomberg]

* Attorneys for California’s sex workers have filed suit to overturn the state’s ban on prostitution, claiming that “[t]he rights of adults to engage in consensual, private sexual activity (even for compensation) is a fundamental liberty interest.” Yeah, okay. [AP]

* “The simple story is that $160,000 as a starting salary at large law firms is less prevalent than it was immediately prior to the recession.” You can scream “NY TO 190K!” all you want, but starting salaries have remained flat. Sowwy. [DealBook / New York Times]

* U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara of the Southern District of New York has involved himself in an “escalating war of words” with members of the federal judiciary that he may come to regret. Will this “petulant rooster” be able to kiss and make up? [New York Times]

* Per a recently filed lawsuit, Alex Rodriguez of the Yankees still hasn’t paid a single law firm for their representation in the Biogenesis case. He allegedly owes Gordon & Rees $380,059 in unpaid fees. Come on, A-Rod. You’ve got the cash. [New York Daily News]

* Infamous plaintiffs’ attorney Steven Donziger of the $9.5 billion Chevron / Ecuador kerfuffle decided that if he can’t win his case in a court of law, he might as well try to win it in the court of public opinion. Check out his side of the story. [Law360 (sub. req.)]

* Thanks to Wonkette for pointing out that we were on this whole Ruth Baby Ginsburg thing last year. [Wonkette] * Speaking of our legally themed Halloween costume contest, please send us your nominations. [Above the Law] * Salacious allegations about a high-flying investment banker invite comparisons to The Wolf of Wall Street. [Dealbreaker] * The Second Circuit puts a stop to a legal challenge to the stop-and-frisk settlement. [How Appealing] * You’d expect a former lawmaker to have a better understanding of… the law. [Lexington Herald-Leader] * The Wall Street Journal reviews Paul Barrett’s new book (affiliate link) about the never-ending Chevron/Ecuador litigation. [Wall Street Journal] * Speaking of the Chevron/Ecuador matter, here’s more about the Canadian Bar Association’s controversial involvement, which Canada columnist Steve Dykstra covered earlier. [rabble.ca] * Some thoughts from Jonathan Mermin on something lawyers see every day: bad arguments. [Green Bag] * Here’s a great new resource for our fellow aficionados of appellate arguments. [Free Law Project]

Is the Canadian Bar Association sticking its nose where it doesn't belong?

* Politics and Biglaw just don’t mix: House Republicans hired Quinn Emanuel to handle their suit against President Barack Obama after Baker Hostetler withdrew from the representation due to “political pressure” the firm was facing. [Politico]

* The paper and napkin-eating “Middleman” in the post-it note insider trading ring pleaded guilty to securities fraud charges. This might make it difficult for his cohorts to substantiate their not-guilty pleas. [DealBook / New York Times]

* “This is a tale with no shortage of knaves or villains.” If you’re interested in learning about Chevron’s legal wranglings in Ecuador and with plaintiffs attorney Steven Donziger, there are a bunch of interesting new readings for you to peruse. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Crisis in legal education be damned! They may have bad timing, but these law schools are focusing on building bigger and better facilities for students they’re unable to put in their seats. [National Law Journal]

* Ohio law schools have taken a bruising in terms of decreased enrollment, but the University of Toledo has faced the worst of it. With a 25.9% reduction in 1Ls, tuition cuts can only do so much. [Toledo Blade]

An in-depth article in Rolling Stone takes a close look at the never-ending litigation between Steven Donziger and Chevron.

* Have you all called the Breaking Bad law firm number yet? Because it works, so go for it! [Legal Cheek] * How to make airlines more profitable: make everyone sit on bicycle seats! [Lowering the Bar] * Ilya Somin explains why the D.C. Circuit’s interpretation in Halbig isn’t absurd. And it’s not absurd. It just reflects the hilariously cynical conservative opposition to giving their own citizens tax breaks. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post] * Ohio State fired its band director amid sexual harassment allegations. To fire a guy, Ohio State must have dotted every “i” in this investigation. [USA Today] * Speaking of sexual harassment, the Navy’s Blue Angels are the subject of a sexual harassment suit. And somehow it involves a blue and gold penis seen from space. [Slate] * The Chevron battle over Ecuador continues. Turns out the star witness Chevron paid upwards of $1 million to testify took 50 days of prep to finally get his ever-shifting story straight. [Huffington Post] * There’s a new book out called Kate’s Escape from the Billable Hour (affiliate link). We haven’t read it, but apparently this tale of “a burnt-out, second-year attorney working in the dysfunctional world of Big Law” mentions ATL. So they definitely did their research. [Amazon] * Watch a drunk guy give cops a lesson in Con Law. Video after the jump…. [Barstool Sports]

Why did Squire Sanders suspend the merger vote, and what are the chances of it being restarted?

How much is Patton Boggs paying to make this nightmare come to an end?

What's the latest bad news for the troubled law firm of Patton Boggs?

* A guy who tried to get on the bench more than once was just busted in a prostitution sting. Oops. He also spells his name weird. [The Press Democrat] * Tomorrow, Gibson Dunn partner Miguel Estrada will argue before the Second Circuit that private parties can’t get injunctions under RICO. For those keeping score, Gibson Dunn partner Randy Mastro hangs his whole case in Chevron v. Donziger on a request for an injunction under RICO. Time to play the Distinguish Polka. [Courthouse News] * Wait until the RIAA realizes there are royalties to be made at CIA black sites in Uzbekistan. Because the only thing more torturous than being forced to listen to this music is the tenacity of the RIAA. [Slate] * More on the legislative fight over accrual accounting versus cash-basis accounting for Biglaw firms. To the barricades! Swear your allegiance to Generalissimo MacEwen! [Adam Smith, Esq.] * Is there a right to online anonymity? All the people out there trying to hire contract killers over the Internet certainly think so. [InsidePrivacy] * Jay Edelson and Chandler Givens of Edelson PC examine the flawed law firm recruitment model. [Legal Solutions Blog / Thomson Reuters] * Slip and falls at the IRS office. [Lowering the Bar]

* Choose your own adventure: Will you read this to see how many times Justice Alito recused himself during OT 2013? Or will you read this to see Justice Alito’s doofy-looking picture? [National Law Journal]

* Hackers took down the entire PACER system as well as various federal court websites on Friday. No, the FBI says it was “technical problems.” Oops, nope, still hackers. 🙁 [Switch / Washington Post]

* It seems the best way to train new associates is to do the opposite of what Biglaw has been doing for decades. Take Stephen Susman’s word for it — you could probably end up with a $40k bonus. [The Careerist]

* A decision hasn’t been rendered in the Chevron case yet, but is Steven Donziger feeling pessimistic? He’s already hired impressive appellate counsel. [WSJ Law Blog]

* “Everybody’s been very nice to us, even though we’re lawyers.” Shocker. David Boies, Ted Boutrous, and Ted Olson had fun at the Sundance Film Festival promoting “The Case Against 8.” [Associated Press]

* Finally, a happy ending to an absurd science experiment. Over the weekend, a judge ordered that Marlise Munoz, a brain-dead pregnant woman in Texas, be removed from her respirators and ventilators. [CNN]

What does Steven Donziger have to say for himself in his civil RICO trial?

Highlights from Justice Thomas's hilarious and heartwarming remarks at last night's Federalist Society dinner.

Ed. note: In honor of Columbus Day (and Canadian Thanksgiving), Above the Law will be on a reduced publication schedule today. We will be back in full force tomorrow.

* Justice stops for no one, not even a broken Congress. With the end of days approaching quickly for federal courts in terms of funding (or the lack thereof), many judges are lashing out and declaring all their employees essential. [National Law Journal]

* Legal expenses can be especially “painful,” even for the biggest of banks, but sadist firms like Sullivan & Cromwell, Paul Weiss, and WilmerHale are really getting their rocks off on Jamie Dimon’s suffering. [DealBook / New York Times]

* DLA Piper’s future’s so bright it’s got to wear shades — and appoint a new co-managing partner in New York City, its largest office. Congratulations to Richard Hans, you’ve co-made it! [New York Law Journal]

* “It’s not just about me.” Jim Tanner, a Williams & Connolly partner who represents Jeremy Lin, is leaving the firm to start his own sports management business, and he’s taking people with him. [Bloomberg]

* “I have no apologies to make about anything I did.” Steven Donziger of Chevron/Ecuador infamy will be defending himself in court this week in what’s being called a legal cage match. [Wall Street Journal]

* “Touro is asking a judge to declare the school a diploma mill.” Irony alert: Touro wants Novus University Law School, a school supposedly conferring “worthless law degrees,” to be stopped. [New York Post]

* If you think SCOTUS abused its discretion in the early abortion cases, you’re going to love this book (affiliate link), a “cautionary tale” about consequences of decisions like Roe v. Wade. [Wall Street Journal]

* Say what you will about Justice Scalia, but the man is hilarious — more funny than his four liberal colleagues combined, according to a statistical analysis of oral argument recordings. [New York Times]

* The government shutdown is slowing down the judicial confirmation process, already famous for its speed and efficiency. [The BLT: The Blog of Legal Times]

* More about news for Steven Donziger in his long-running battle with Chevron. Maybe it’s time to surrender, Steve? I hear Ecuador is a great place to retire. [New York Law Journal]

* Law firm merger mania continues, as Carlton Fields combines with Jorden Burt. [Carlton Fields (press release)]

* Herbert Smith Freehills says “you’re hired” to Scott Balber, the lawyer for Donald Trump who got mocked by Bill Maher on national television. [The Lawyer]

* You might see your dog as harmless and cuddly, but the law might see your dog as a weapon (and rightfully so, in my opinion). [New York Times via ABA Journal]

* Congratulations to all the winners of the FT’s Innovative Lawyers awards. [Financial Times]

* And congratulations to Heidi Wendel and Deirdre McEvoy, high-ranking government lawyers headed to Jones Day and Patterson Belknap, respectively. [New York Law Journal]

* Today the Supreme Court will hear argument in McCutcheon v. FEC, a major campaign finance case that some are calling “the next Citizens United.” Check out an interview with one of the lawyers behind it, after the jump. [UCTV]

Marty Lasden of California Lawyer magazine interviewed the severely conservative James Bopp Jr. for the “Legally Speaking” series (in which I previously participated). It appears this interview with Bopp took place before Bopp got bumped from the podium in favor of Erin Murphy, a young superstar of the Supreme Court bar.