The last time we had a motion to continue from Alabama, it was lighthearted and funny. A lawyer asked for the continuance in order to attend the ‘Bama/UT BCS Championship game. We know how much Alabamans love their football.
But we also know how much people in Alabama love their Republican talking points. Sure, you’d think it’d be hard to weave a Glen Beck rant into a run-of-the-mill motion to continue. But you’d be misunderestimating the good lawyers in Alabama.
The joint motion to continue was filed because a key witness needed to out of the country:
1. The Defendant’s County Engineer, Mike Henderson, has had to leave the country for a family medical emergency and will not return in time for the trial;
2. Mr. Henderson is the key fact witness for both the Plaintiff and Defendant.
For ordinary lawyers, the first two points would be enough. But that’s not how they roll in Alabama:
3. Because the country of Canada has universal healthcare, not unlike what this Country will soon experience due to the socialistic and unconstitutional healthcare bill passed by our Congress and signed by our President, Mr. Henderson’s father, who has needed open-heart surgery for sometime, is provided with only seven days notice of his approval for this surgery by the Canadian government. The notice of approval was just recently given to Mr. Henderson’s father and therefore both Plaintiff’s counsel as well as Defense counsel just learned of his unavailability for trial.
Only seven days notice for expensive heart surgery that the government pays for? Oh the horror! How dare America even think of providing health care to people who don’t have it. Even the currently uninsured would sooner die from lack of care rather than having to wait in a socialist/communist/fascist/sinful/multicultural/Jesus-killing line.
Cameron v Tuscaloosa[PDF]
Earlier: Best. Motion to Continue. Ever.