Ever Wanted to Kickbox the Judge You Work For? You Can, In Texas

Have you ever clerked and wanted to beat the stuffing out of your judge? In Texas, you might just get that opportunity. But be careful — some Texas judges have skills.

The Supreme Court of Texas Blog has the story of one of them: Texas State Supreme Court Justice, David Medina:

Justice David Medina’s biography notes that “in college he competed on the university’s karate . . . team.”…

Turns out, he recently participated in a match — with a law clerk. Thanks to the power of YouTube, you can watch from the comfort and relative safety of your office.

Does the opportunity to beat up a state supreme court justice outweigh the possibility of getting your ass handed to you on a plate by a 51-year-old man?

Let’s get ready to rumble…

How did it come pass that a law clerk and a Justice were fighting in a kickboxing ring? As we understand it, each year the Texas Supreme Court does a charity auction for staff and clerks. This year, Medina’s gift was the opportunity to watch him beat the stuffing out of an (I’m guessing) uppity law clerk who needed to be put in his place. Just kidding. I’m sure kickboxing your colleagues is just another way to say “howdy” in Texas.

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So how did the match turn out? Look below to see a video clip of the first round.

Warning: What you are about to see will not remind you of a Jean Claude van Damme movie. It will not remind you of a UFC brawl. It will remind you of two lawyers fighting: lots of rules, lots of stoppages, and an occasional slap in the face.

Justice Medina is in black. The other guy wins round one:

Click over to Don Cruse’s post on the Texas Supreme Court Blog to see the other two rounds and the eventual winner.

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Just know that Justice Medina is no slouch. We understand he won a Kajenbuko tournament in Las Vegas earlier this month.

And tomorrow is Justice Medina’s birthday. If this is what he does for charity, can you imagine what he does for fun? He probably doesn’t rent a clown; instead he hires ninjas to jump out at him and blow out his candles with their dying breaths.

If you live long enough, you will well learn the one immutable rule of American society: do not, under any circumstances, mess with Texas.

Don’t Mess With Texas Supreme Court Justice Medina [The Supreme Court of Texas Blog]