The Grass Is Not Always Greener: Layoffs in Bermuda

Nothing depresses me more than when bad things happen in the Caribbean (except for Haiti, ’cause I’m used to it, or Cuba, because they get better health care than we do). Especially during the winter months, I like to imagine that I could leave every material possession behind and move to the Caribbean and find work and happiness.

CORRECTION: The commenters have informed me that Bermuda is not only not a Caribbean island, it is not even a “tropical” island. I apologize for this grievous geographic gaffe. I should also add that my stated desire to move “to the Caribbean” referred to islands in and around the Caribbean. I do not wish to physically reside on the ocean itself, nor with any of the undersea civilizations that ATL commenter-cartographers don’t even know about.

Sadly, it looks like layoffs have a passport. Law Shucks is reporting that lawyers and staff were laid off from the Bermuda law firm of Conyers Dill & Pearman. Many of them were not native to Bermuda. :(.

There is no “paradise,” not in this global economy…

Law Shucks tells us that Conyers Dill & Pearman should be known to lawyers who have ever needed local counsel in Bermuda. But the firm apparently also employs a fair number of American lawyers and staff.

All I can think of is the sadness laid-off U.S. attorneys must be feeling. I mean, I’m sure the Bermudan layoff casualties are pretty sad too. Obviously, there’s a universal sadness that comes from being laid off.

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But I bet it feels differently for an expat. You get your J.D. and spend some time in the legal market in a big American city. And maybe one day you say, “Screw this rat race, I’m going to move to a tropical island. I’m sure I’ll be able to get a job, and as long as I listen to the hurricane evacuation warnings, I’ll be golden.”

And so you go. And it works out. You find a job, do a little legal work, have a non-tourism-based job. You’re tanned and healthy and you like that your rat race friends — even as they try to lord their professional “successes” over you — still try to grab a weekend of “rest” in a place you’re lucky to call home. “Wow, sounds like a super impressive deal you’ve been working on Jim. You wanna go… hey, you’re on vacation, put your BlackBerry down. Yeah, I understand. Well, if I’m going to get this surf in before my meeting, I’ve got to go now. I’ll catch up with you later.”

And then one day you’re out on your ear, just another unemployed lawyer in a world that is full of them. You’ve given up some amount of career prestige for life happiness, and now you’re out of a job entirely.

Apparently, these lawyer layoffs are just the latest signs of a struggling Bermudian economy. From Bernews:

The 2010 Bermuda Job Market Employment Briefs showed a loss of almost 700 jobs in Bermuda in 2009, with 39,520 jobs counted in 2009 compared to 40,213 in 2008. According to a report from the Chamber of Commerce, more than 3,500 work permits have been lost since 2007, with the report saying that each permit holder accounts for an estimated $100,000 direct spending in the Bermuda economy, which equals a $350 million loss over three years.

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Sigh. Is there no escape from this goddamn recession anywhere? This would be like if Andy Dufresne made it all the way to Zihuatanejo, only to be raped by a swordfish while out on his fishing boat.

I’m depressed now. And it’s freaking freezing outside. Looks like I picked the wrong morning to quit drinking.

Layoffs in Paradise [Law Shucks]
Lay-offs at Conyers, Dill & Pearman [Bernews]

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