What’s more hopeless than sending two lawyers out on a blind date and hoping they hit it off? Answer: Sending thirty-something lawyers out on a blind date and hoping they hit off.
It’s safe to assume that a person (and especially a woman) still single in their 30s is a picky type. As Elie recently lectured a trio of
spinsters +30 single ladies, “You could have gotten married at some point in your 20s and you chose not to. There’s not something wrong with the guys you date; there’s something wrong with you.” It’s possible that Elie learned all that he knows about women from Lori Gottlieb.
Despite odds being stacked against me, I decided to match up two D.C. lawyers in their mid 30s. They have different political stripes, but both named Atticus Finch as their favorite legal character, and would gladly give up gavels for spatulas. Asked for three words about themselves, he said he was a “funny nerdy cultured chef” and she said she was a “city-dwelling chef/policy-wonk.” They sounded like they should be able to come up with a recipe for romance…
I sent them to Bistrot du Coin in Dupont Circle on a Friday night. They’re in their 30s — I figured they could handle a dinner date.
He had said he’d be carrying a redweld and pink highlighter — perhaps not getting the evening off to the sexiest start possible. He got there first and put his name on the waiting list.
I did not have long to wait — she walked in soon after and immediately noticed the redweld, introduced herself, and complimented me on my means of identification.
Well, at least she dug it. Pink Highlit Man says:
We were able to be seated immediately, and we set about learning about one another. We both had a few things in common (history in Chicago, the law, etc.), but until we started talking about our true interests, we were both wondering why you thought we would be a good match. The minute she said that she was into fine food and food prep, we both knew — nicely done!
So I thought…
We spent most of the rest of our meal (dinner and wine with coffee/tea in lieu of dessert) discussing food, restaurants, favorite food blogs, chefs… I had always prided myself on my expertise in the kitchen, but she was completely out of my league in this regard — and I found that most refreshing. She was also extremely intelligent and very attractive (thank you for that). I was trying my best not to screw it up — when I am nervous, I tend to get overly garrulous — and I think that I succeeded.
At least… I thought I had, until we reached the end of our meal. As we finished our after-dinner drinks, she told me that she was fading and that it had been a long week at work. “Uh-oh”, I thought to myself, “the old ‘(yawn), what a long week’ withdrawal from a date — she is obviously not into me. Oh well — I had a nice evening, and I should let her know.”…
I would like to see her again, but I am unsure if the feeling is mutual — I am pretty clueless about reading signals. At the very least, I would have hoped to have made a new foodie friend in DC.
They exchanged business cards (with personal numbers jotted on the back), hugged and said good night. Unfortunately, this promising soufflé of a date fell flat. Our J.D. Julia Childs says:
It was a pleasant enough evening — and really, what more can you ask out of a blind date?
We figured out pretty quickly that you matched us because of a shared love of cooking. So we shared cooking tips, favorite recipes, favorite food blogs (we have the same one)… and that was enjoyable. But at the end of the day, there’s a spark or there’s not — and there wasn’t. I don’t expect the earth to move on a first date … but I do want to find something uniquely exciting and interesting about the person, enough to pique my interest to want to know more … or to find myself wondering what it would be like to kiss him … and neither of those things happened. He’s a nice guy, but not one I’m dying to hang out with again.
He emailed her about going on a second date, but she declined. Pink Highlit says:
So I sent her an email to thank her for a nice time and to see if she were interested in meeting for dinner or drinks this week, and she responded a week later with a very nice email thanking me for dinner and concluding that she did not think we would be a good match. I appreciated her honesty and, in retrospect, know that she is absolutely right. I wish her the best. Thank you for setting it up — I had a pleasant enough evening.
Well, this Courtship combo was like a Sauvignon Blanc paired with steak — not very tasty. Hopefully, I’ll find ingredients that mix better next time….