Archive for December 2011

This is my least favorite post to write every year. The Debevoise & Plimpton bonuses were just announced. So now it’s time for me to sit back and marvel at how much money I personally left on the table when I decided to quit Debevoise what feels like a lifetime ago.

In fact, the very first time I can remember hearing about the website “Above the Law” was when a person sitting next to me in a cubicle at the New York Press said: “Jesus Elie, your old firm just paid twice as much in bonus than we’ll make this year. It’s all over this Above the Law site.”

Ah, but it’s not like that this year. This year, Debevoise is just matching the S&C bonuses that aren’t overly impressive. Bottom rail on top now, mister….

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Who says lawyers can't rock out?

We talk a lot here on Above the Law about the difficulties attorneys have in finding a work-life balance. Often Biglaw life becomes all work, all the time. Or sometimes, burned out attorneys run in the other direction entirely and open a bike shop, but it rarely feels like there is a viable in-between.

I’m inclined to say that if you have a passion, you should go for it, no matter what other people think. Lawyers should be allowed to wear different hats. Sometimes that means allegedly showing off your new boobs to co-workers. Sometimes it means making rap music.

And in one Ohio attorney’s case, it means writing, directing, producing, and starring in epically bizarre, Camelot-inspired heavy metal videos….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “The Squire Sanders Attorney Who Made the ‘Most Epically Awful’ Video of 2011″

The floodgates are open and we are awash in bonus news. Sources are reporting that Simpson Thacher and Cleary Gottlieb are both matching the Sullivan & Cromwell bonus scale.

That means a little extra money for those at the very top of the scale.

But does it mean spring bonuses?

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Read carefully, because Kaye Scholer is hoping you won’t.

Last night, Kaye Scholer announced a match of the Cravath bonus scale from this season. And a match of the Cravath spring bonus from last season. But that has nothing to do with 2012 spring bonuses, which Sullivan & Cromwell alluded to last night. So even as Kaye Scholer associates are being “made whole” from the firm’s cheap stance on the last bonus season, it looks like they’re already starting this bonus season in the hole.

Keeping you updated about the latest bonus shenanigans is what Above the Law is here for….

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If you are an IP attorney who is looking for an in-house gig, Christmas may come early for you this year. This week’s Job of the Week is an excellent opportunity for an IP attorney to work in-house for a well-established, public company with annual sales over $5 billion! Lateral Link has been retained to find a Patent Prosecution Counsel for a Fortune 500 company’s Palo Alto office. Check out the details below.

Position: Patent Prosecution Counsel

Description of Position: The Patent Prosecution Counsel will assist with the completion of invention disclosures, work with the technical team to draft and file patent applications, and manage outside counsel. Qualifications: JD and license to practice in at least one state; registered to practice before the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office; degree in Electrical Engineering or Computer Science; experience with consumer electronic devices; experience in U.S. and foreign patent preparation and prosecution at a law firm and/or in-house.

Location: Palo Alto, California

This opportunity is brought to you by Lateral Link’s In-House Director Diana Rubin. To work with Diana and to apply to this opportunity or other in-house opportunities, please register at www.laterallink.com. You can also reach out to her directly via email at drubin@laterallink.com. If you already are a Lateral Link member, see position position #10658, or contact your recruiter for more details.

There’s a lot to unpack this morning about the sudden resignation of Lawrence Sager, Dean of the University of Texas Law School.

Before we get into the rumor circus — and it’s a complete circus right now — let’s get some facts straight:

A) Larry Sager was already on his way out. We reported in August that Sager had decided to step down at the end of the year.
B) Sager was forced out yesterday. UT President William Powers Jr. told the Austin American-Statesman: “We asked him to step down and he did.” Stefanie Lindquist takes over as interim dean, immediately.

If some reports are to be believed, it’s not an accident that a woman will be replacing Dean Sager. Allegations of gender inequality when it comes to pay are hounding Sager as he makes this hasty exit.

Let’s delve into it and get some student reaction…

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* DLA Piper is blaming the Occupy Wall Street movement for Biglaw’s sad, 2011 bonus season. It looks like we can expect a Cravath match from that firm. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

* We could really use some more law schools — fourth tier law schools, in particular. Say hello to the Savannah Law School, a John Marshall Law School Atlanta production. [National Law Journal]

* University of Texas School of Law Dean Larry Sager has been ousted from his position. Readers have flooded our inbox with the news, so we’ll have more on this later. [Texas Tribune]

* This Senate victory for gay servicemembers came with unintended consequences. It’s now kosher to have sex with men, women, and everything else under military law. [Washington Post]

* Prosecutors will be seeking the death penalty against Stephen McDaniel. If being drawn and quartered were an option, maybe this medieval scholar wouldn’t mind so much. [Macon Telegraph]

* Bueller? Bueller? Bueller? Although Ben Stein is the keynote speaker at this year’s ABA Techshow, legal tech nerds will likely be unable to win his money. [ABA Journal]

Lat here. As Elie just predicted, Sullivan & Cromwell has shown up to Bigfoot the partnership of Cravath — sort of. It has announced a year-end bonus scale that is very similar to, but slightly better than, the Cravath bonus scale.

And, more importantly, it has promised spring bonuses. The ATL headquarters is around Soho, but we could hear the gnashing of partners’ teeth in both midtown and downtown Manhattan.

Let’s get into the specifics….

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Non-Sequiturs: 12.08.11

A man whose political career has been declared "over" in three different decades.

* Normally, I’m not sure there’s anything “bad” you can do to prosecutors, but maybe the Lindsey prosecutors deserved better. [Forbes]

* Is Newt Gingrich already breaking the law? Whatever, who cares, it’s not like the people who support him really care about things like that. [WSJ Law Blog]

* I think it’d be funny if the Occupy Boston protesters disrupted a shipment of tea right about now. [Volokh Conspiracy]

* Meanwhile, Occupy Nashville is holding strong. [Young Lawyers Blog]

* Avoiding Nanny Tax problems. [Nanny Pro]

* Police versus plankers. [Legal Blog Watch]

* The champagne of Four Lokos. [Village Voice]

Professors Richard Epstein and John Yoo

The topic of whether (and how) to reform legal education remains very hot. The latest New York Times story — by David Segal, who isn’t very popular among law school deans right now — has sparked much online commentary.

And it’s not over yet. What do Professors Richard Epstein and John Yoo — two of legal academia’s most colorful characters, rock stars in Federalist Society circles — think of the current state of law schools here in the United States?

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After yesterday’s excitement over the Boies Schiller bonuses, we’re back to the Cravath scale. Today Weil Gotshal came out with its year-end bonuses. The firm is matching Cravath.

Our sources report the Weil scale starts at $7,500 for full first-year associates — no stub-year bonus for the class of 2011, like at Milbank — and tops out $37,500.

UPDATE (12/15/11): Weil just announced that it will pay $42,500 to its most-senior associates, in accordance with the Sullivan & Cromwell bonus scale. Memo below.

Actually, for Weil associates this “match” could be even worse than last year’s bonuses. That’s because Weil followed through on its promise to phase out extra cash for top performers….

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Happy Holidays from your ATL editors: Elie Mystal, Staci Zaretsky, and David Lat.

We were pleasantly surprised by how many of you seemed to be interested in our recent holiday party photos. So we’ve decided to bring you more, this time with the opportunity to offer your insights on our pictures.

(Yes, despite our new comments policy, we’re still happy to let you poke fun at us.)

Let’s have a look, shall we?

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People have occasionally asked me for advice about interview techniques.

My suggestion has always been short and pointed: “Say something smart. Say something funny. Ask a good question. And get the heck out of there.”

What about on the other side of the table? I really don’t trust interviews. I don’t believe that it’s possible to tell during a half hour or an hour whether someone is truly competent or a great bluffer. I never thought I learned much from forcing people to talk about their résumés. So when I was interviewing candidates for jobs at a big law firm, I’d try to identify something that the applicant claimed to know — a practice area, a procedural issue, a case the person had defended — and engage the person on that subject. I figured that I was thus showing interest in something about the applicant while giving myself a chance to assess whether the applicant was sentient.

But now I work at a place that sells human resources consulting as part of its business. That requires folks to think a little harder about interviewing techniques. After all, if you’re offering professional advice about conducting interviews, you ought to interview your own job applicants effectively. I’ve recently been educated on this subject and, as a dutiful blogger, I’ll share with you what I’ve learned. What is behavioral interviewing, and why is it better than traditional interview techniques?

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Tamara Tanzillo

Yesterday, we brought you the titillating tale of Tamara Tanzillo. In case you haven’t been following along, Tanzillo, an Illinois attorney, has been accused of a number of racy, ethical transgressions, all of which were detailed in our prior coverage.

Attorneys with breast implants and alleged exhibitionist tendencies are apparently the key to success in the law blogging world, because the story went viral. Readers have requested more information about our favorite Boss Lady, and we are more than happy to oblige.

Read on to get all of the details about this fiery, legal redhead — including her bra size….

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The lateral hiring market has improved substantially over the past year. With that improvement, associates are receiving a greater number of cold-calls from recruiters. For many junior associates, these calls are a new phenomenon. Your choice of a recruiter — and the way you manage the process — will have a profound impact on your short-term and long-term opportunities.

There are many good recruiters and many benefits to using a good one. However, not all recruiters are created equal. Jordan Abshire, legal recruiter and Managing Director at Lateral Link, offers some great pointers on handling the cold-calls and selecting a good recruiter, as well as some background information on the recruiting process….

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Last week in Non-Sequiturs, we pointed you to a photo essay of some of the sketchiest lawyer billboards out there. From dogs, to eye patches, to crazy nicknames, these billboards are the epitome of what makes local lawyer advertising so painfully bad.

It’s tough to say which is worse — these misguided attempts at originality, or the overly earnest types who make lofty promises to fight for you and protect your rights. The serious advertisements are equally subject to mockery.

One Florida solo practitioner may have discovered the perfect approach. No over-the-top gimmicks, no vows to fight injustice. Just the simple, honest truth….

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Members of the University of Illinois College of Law community received sad and disturbing news yesterday when they learned that a faculty member at the law school was the victim of an apparent hate crime.

The law professor (who remains anonymous at the request of the University) was found on the second floor of the Illinois Terminal on Wednesday.

University president Michael Hogan assured students and faculty that the alleged attack was made by a person who is not affiliated with the university….

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The Cornwall: home to a Cravath crib.

The venerable firm of Cravath, Swaine & Moore has received a fair amount of criticism for its allegedly subpar bonuses. I’ve previously defended their payouts — in times of economic uncertainty, is paying modest bonuses to avoid later layoffs such a bad idea? — but my view has been poorly received. (For commentary castigating firms for their cheapness, please turn to my colleague, Elie Mystal.)

Partners at Cravath, where profits per partner exceeded $3 million in 2010, are definitely in the top 1 percent. But it seems that even non-partners are doing quite nicely for themselves, despite all the bonus bellyaching.

Check out the million-dollar penthouse — yay real estate porn! — of one of Cravath’s corporate lawyers. And she’s not even a partner….

UPDATE (12/12/11): We’ve gotten our hands on the floorplan, which we’ve added to the slideshow, and we’ve added additional comments about what a “practice area attorney” does at Cravath.

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(A non-partner’s million-dollar penthouse.)

Morning Docket: 12.08.11

* In an unprecedented move, Health Secretary Kathleen Sebelius has overruled the FDA. Looks like the Obama administration thinks that Plan B will turn little girls into promiscuous prosti-tots. [Wall Street Journal]

* Due to this ruling, Occupy Boston protesters will probably have to STFU and GTFO. Bring out the brooms, because this will be the only sweep that Red Sox Nation gets to see for a while. [Bloomberg]

* Hopefully UVA Law student Joshua Gomes has some transcript paper stashed away, because with a bond hearing on December 12, he’s probably going to be missing some finals. [The Hook]

* The spouses of the Supremes have published Chef Supreme, a cookbook dedicated to RBG’s husband, famed tax lawyer Martin Ginsburg. Better title: Article III Gourmand. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Lovely Hooters ladies in California will no longer have to pay for their uniforms thanks to this class action settlement. Stay tuned for smaller, tighter uniforms in light of budgetary constraints. [KCRA 3]