Ahh, “sh*t law.” In case you aren’t familiar with the term, it’s what some lawyers rudely and condescendingly call legal practice outside of Biglaw. From traffic tickets to personal injury, you name it, and it’s apparently a derivative of “sh*t law.”
Back in March, we brought you a story about Joseph Neal Jr., the apparent king of one of these so-called “sh*t law” practices in Augusta, Georgia. Neal, a prominent personal injury attorney, earned our Lawyer of the Day title after he and his ex-wife racked up criminal charges for allegedly drugging and sexually assaulting the family babysitter. Neal later went on to earn 21% of the vote in our March Lawyer of the Month competition.
Now, just a few short months later, Neal has been sentenced after accepting the terms of a plea bargain. The deal reduced a felony rape charge to two misdemeanors. Neal will serve three years of supervised probation, and he’ll also commit to a term of community service that some would call a bit of poetic justice….
Last week, Superior Court Judge James Blanchard sentenced Neal to 100 hours of community service to take place at a sewage treatment plant. From “sh*t law” to literally wading in sh*t; how do ya like them apples? Judge Blanchard claims that he chose the sewage plant for Neal “in keeping with the conduct in this case.”
And as for Neal’s improper conduct, the Augusta Chronicle describes some text messages sent between Neal and the babysitter that caused prosecutors to admit this had turned into a “he said and she said” case:
In one exchange, read aloud by the baby sitter, Neal described himself as a “sex god” and the woman countered, “I’ll have to be the judge of that.”
“I dare you to be the judge of that,” Neal replied.
The messages continued in that manner until the woman said she “doesn’t want to be a tease.”
“You can be our babysitter and sex slave LOL,” Neal stated.
“I don’t know about that,” the woman replied, then later, “You’re going to have to contain yourself.”
Alas, thanks to his conduct, this “sex god” will have to further sully his hands with sh*t outside the confines of his personal injury practice.