Guido Calabresi, SCOTUS, Stephen Breyer, Supreme Court, Weddings

Legal Eagle Wedding Watch: Don’t Pee on My Leg

Hey, did you guys know that Asian people sometimes marry Jewish people? No? Well, the New York Times has noticed, and they’re totally on it! Here’s the paper’s investigative masterpiece on Asian-Jewish intermixing, which manages a paragraph linking Amy Chua and Jed Rubenfeld to the Beastie Boys.

We await a hard-hitting NYT piece on the cultural implications of the WGWAG.

Meanwhile, it’s high wedding season for couples of all races and creeds. Here are three of the most outstanding:

Debra Elias and Seth Grossman

Ebonie Hazle and David Rochelson

Laurie Pila and Gregory Sheindlin

More on these couples, plus other lawyer weddings, after the jump….

Debra Elias and Seth Grossman
(Buy them Gilmore Girls: The Complete Series Collection.)

The Case:
– This bride, a Northwestern graduate, toils in the drab world of market research. But her sad little life just got a glamour injection, because she’s married to a SCOTUS clerk! Her prince charming was summa at Penn, and has a law degree from Yale. He clerked for Justice Breyer a few years ago, and is now deputy general counsel at the Department of the Homeland Security.
– They were married by senior Second Circuit judge and Yale professor Guido Calabresi, for whom Seth clerked. (Incidentally, we’re pretty sure Judge Calabresi wrote his own Wikipedia entry, as it reads like a transcript of his gratuitously biographical and wildly self-aggrandizing torts lectures.)

The Case Against:
– Homeland Security: Infringing your civil liberties, and not in a sexy way like the CIA. Prestige fail.

Ebonie Hazle and David Rochelson
(Buy them a cutting board.)

The Case:
– These soulmates met at Harvard as undergraduates and later earned law degrees in New York, she at Columbia and he at NYU.
– Ebonie is an associate at Gibson Dunn; David is headed to Simpson Thacher.
– We love the blending of cultures they’ve achieved: Christian and Jewish, black and white, Columbia and NYU.

The Case Against:
– They lose points for their photo, which looks like two separate pictures Photoshopped together. They’d have been better off using Ebonie’s Gibson headshot, which is outstanding.

Laurie Pila and Gregory Sheindlin

The Case:
– This bride, obviously too pretty to be a lawyer, works in video production. Apparently she was also too pretty to attend college. The groom graduated from SUNY-Albany and Brooklyn Law School; he has his own law firm.
– The groom’s father is Gerald “Jerry” Sheindlin, who presided over The People’s Court from 1999 to 2001. He’s also a real-life judge, having served on the New York State Supreme Court. Even better, the groom’s stepmother is Judith “Judge Judy” Sheindlin, no-nonsense TV jurist and the author of such classics as Don’t Pee on My Leg and Tell Me It’s Raining. Both Jerry and Judy took part in Laurie and Greg’s ceremony (not in their TV personas, we hope).

The Case Against:
– Judge Judy, a New York Law School grad and former family court prosecutor who bullies and humiliates losers for an audience of bigger losers, has one of the highest-rated shows on daytime television and earns $45 million a year. Obviously, the lesson here is that you should ignore the naysayers and go to law school.

The Verdict:
Team Elias-Grossman has a great clerkship and Team Pila-Sheindlin has a crabby stepmom with gobs of money. We’ll ignore all that and award the Couple of the Week crown to Team Hazle-Rochelson, which seems like the pair least likely to annoy the crap out of you at a dinner party. Congratulations to all the newlyweds!

Honorable Mention:
Stephanie Early and Alastair Green (2, Harvard)
Jessica Weber and Nancy Eddy (Yale)
Anna Siemon and Gerald Moody Jr. (2, Columbia, Debevoise, Davis Polk)
Jennifer Lane and Kennedy Gachiri (2, Harvard, Yale, Cleary)
Abim Thomas and Hamilton Jones (Georgetown)

The Rest:
Matthew Gray and Terence Noonan (BU)
Rachel Pauley and Daniel Litowitz (NYU)
Melissa Wengroff and Nathaniel Spencer (Brooklyn)
Aleksandra Kopec and Lucas Przymusinski (2, Duke, King & Spalding, DLA Piper)
Ariel Wagner and Matthew Levitan (Harvard)
Kathryn Baxter and Christopher Greene (Chicago)
Rebecca Podolsky and Timothy Geller (NYU)
Sunny Larson and Adam Silbert (Rutgers)
Aliza Lipson and Seth Finck (Emory)
Samantha Moskowitz and Michael Levin (Hofstra)
Courtney Cherry and David Ellis (UVA)
Christina Schmidt and Hardy Helburn (Columbia)
Elise Kessler and Michael Snyder (Georgetown)
Ingrid Lund and Christopher Miller (Touro)
Nicole Noonan and Steven Knobel (Seton Hall)
Rachel Bye and Andrew Dulberg (NYU)
Cristina Alger and Jonathan Wang (NYU)
Caroline Blitzer and Craig Phillips (LSU)
Sarah Gray and Ethan Wishnick (2, GW, NYLS)
Laura Townsend and Eric Morrell (Northwestern)
Samantha Brooks and Cory Jacobs (2, New England School of Law)
Danielle Birrer and Erik Syvertsen (Cardozo)
Samantha Ingram and Joshua Abramson (2, Fordham, UPenn)
Amanda Stein and Christian Rieben (NYLS)
Allyson Gunsallus and Victor Ortenberg (Duke)
Elizabeth Irons and Steven Seem (Chicago)
Petra Kann and Thomas Weir (Georgetown)
Camille Fléchet and Jason File (2, Yale, University of Cologne, King’s College, Sorbonne)
Holly Slimak and Christopher Colby (Washington & Lee)
Katrina Chapman and Ned deBary (BU)
William Ho and Bruce Stuart (Albany)
Caroline Vu and Edward Cha (UC Davis)
Melanie Nakagawa and Michael Marino (American University)
Callan Blount and Benjamin Fleming (NYU)
Charlotte Decker and Gabriel Morgan (2, USC, Debevoise, Weil)
Katherine Hynes and Thomas Scott (Fordham)
Jacqueline Rubin and Matthew Healey (Columbia, Paul Weiss)
Katherine Cser and Brian Farrar (2, Brooklyn, Hofstra)
Beth Scott and Anthony Sebro Jr. (2, Fordham, Michigan)
Alyssa Weiss and Guy Billauer (Catholic U.)
Carolyn Vine and Donald Goodson (NYU)
Kimberly Tivin and David Silversmith (Hofstra)

ATL Law School Directory
(hidden for your protection)

comments sponsored by

Show all comments