I get it, having to stand in line to get into a club is annoying. It’s emasculating. You feel if you were more famous or important or rich, you’d be let in right away. And usually you’re right. Standing in line for a club is like public confirmation that you are not that cool.
But let me tell you something, saying “I’m a lawyer” doesn’t make you cool. In fact, it creates a rebuttable presumption that you are an uncool d-bag who says things like “rebuttable presumption.” Certainly, flashing your little “lawyer badge” that you got from the prosecutor’s or attorney general’s office is not going to help you cut in line. You really think these bouncers want your judgmental and probably litigious ass up in their clubs?
Earlier this year, we had a Florida prosecutor you tried to use his badge to get into a strip club. Now we have another Floridan who thinks being a lawyer should get him ahead, but instead it just got him arrested…
The story from the Miami New Times is about Adam Finkel, who is an assistant state attorney. He was trying to get into club Purdy in South Beach, which apparently has a very egalitarian entrance policy. You go, you stand in line, you get in when there’s room. There is no list. But Finkel thought that his state attorney badge was prestigious enough. Yeah, in a line of people waiting to get into a club in Miami, this joker thought that being a state attorney qualified him to cut in line:
[A]n off-duty police officer heard Finkel get into an altercation with Purdy’s doorman early Sunday morning. The doorman informed Finkel he had to wait in line, but Finkel continued to argue with the doorman. The doorman then informed Finkel that he was no longer welcome at Purdy.
Finkel attempted to barge through the door anyway, but the doorman blocked him. Finkel then took “an aggressive fighting stance.” The off-duty officer intervened and told Finkel to leave before he got into any more trouble. Finkel decided to take out his wallet and flashed his State Attorney’s Office badge….
Finkel then got in the officer’s face and pushed his chest. The officer gave him several opportunities to leave, but Finkel kept playing tough guy. The officer noticed that Finkel smelled of alcohol and had bloodshot eyes and slurred speech.
The officer then placed handcuffs on Finkel, but before the officer could restrain both hands, Finkel began spinning. Eventually the officer was able to fully cuff him.
Finkel was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct, trespass, and resisting an officer without violence. You can read the police report here.
Purdy Lounge is the kind of place that puts up photos of its bouncers on its website (warning: the website also autoplays what appears to be ’90s video game music). These don’t look like the kind of guys who are going to be intimidated by a lot of talk and a badge.
At least not a state attorney’s badge.