As many of our readers know, the job scene for recent law school graduates is more than a little rough around the edges. The employment rate is still way down for the “lost generation” of lawyers, and desperation and despair have started to rear their ugly heads. In times like these, you may have to do some crazy things just to get noticed by potential employers.
For example, back in July, we told you about a young man named Brian Zulberti. He emailed the entire Delaware Bar in an effort to procure a job, but he didn’t bother to include his résumé. Instead, he attached a picture of himself in a Villanova Law t-shirt, sleeves rolled up and guns blazing. After a quick search on Google, we found this poor young stud’s half-naked photos. His story went viral, and he has passionately (and perhaps foolishly) tried to extend his 15 minutes of fame ever since.
Even though he claims that he’s received several job offers as a result of this whole affair — and no, “not as a [sic] escort” — Zulberti is no longer in search of a legal job. Right now, he’s trying to bring justice to those who have been damned by the perils of social media in conservative professional spheres like the law. He wants these working stiffs to take back their social lives, and once again he’s emailed hundreds, if not thousands, of practicing attorneys, trying to spread the word about his movement.
And he thought the best way to inspire people to join his cause was to post pictures of his penis online…
Here are selections from the latest email disseminated to Delaware attorneys statewide by Brian Zulberti. And before you even ask, yes, it appears that this assault on professionalism is his actual business card:
Dear Esteemed Colleague of the Delaware Bar,
I contact you asking for your support in an important social cause, albeit a controversial one. Here in Delaware, attorneys have a tendency to tout themselves as paradigms of legal competence, candor, and professionalism. What better distinguished body to take the forefront and speak out against the tidal wave of social media firings that is unjustly obliterating competent and driven employees from coast to coast.
The problem is simple. Americans everywhere, especially professionals such as ourselves, are being fired for posting things through social media that are completely legal and have no tangible relevance whatsoever to their performance at work. The result has been the rise of the nonsensical belief that employers have the right to deem all of their employees as the “face of the company” during every waking moment of their lives. The further result is that each and every one of us, as attorneys, is faced with the decision to either fit into the expectations of how we behave in our private lives, or face the very real specter of devastating workplace consequences.
This is wrong, and I have been working full time since the end of July, thanks in large part to generous donations from supporters and fans, to draw attention to this movement.
Believe it or not, if we are to take Zulberti at his word, these “generous donations” number in the tens of thousands of dollars. Of course, he wasn’t able to offer us actual proof of such (though he did invite us to contact his most recent donors, with their permission), so we’ll just suspend our disbelief and go with it.
All of those donations are being pumped into Zulberti’s magnum opus on social media firings and social media law, which includes a 50-state tour of speaking engagements and a not-safe-for-work website, www.brianzulberti.com, that he seeks to turn into the “most comprehensive national resource” on the subject. It just so happens that the website is also a comprehensive resource of dick pics:
I will offer a brief caution against opening my website at work or in a public place. There is some adult material on the site. After all, in order to stand up and boldly urge Americans everywhere to appreciate diversity, flaunt their identities, and never shy from posting whatever they want to on social media, so long as it is not illegal and does not pertain directly to coworkers or client confidences, I had to go “balls to the wall.” Yes, I did this by posing nude on my website. I am “all in” in this metaphorical poker game, and I invite you all to ante up and assist me.
While we’re not quite sure how posting naked pictures will assist Zulberti in gaining anything more than additional notoriety, he did get quite a rise out of the attorneys who received his mass mailing:
— It looks like he has not stopped digging a bigger hole for himself…
— Not sure he deserves any more negative attention as he seems to thrive on it.
— Seriously, he must be stopped.
— What an embarrassment to the Delaware bar. If up to me, I’d toss him out.
Ouch, that’s way harsh, Delaware attorneys. Maybe we weren’t so out of line when we suggested that Brian Zulberti become a sugar baby. It certainly seems like his legal career, at least in the state where he can practice, is going nowhere at warp speed. On the bright side, at least he can expect the generous donations to keep rolling in from late-night porn surfers who stumble upon his website.
UPDATE (10/22/2013): Since this post was first published, our exclusive story on Brian Zulberti’s antics has gone viral. Here’s his “unofficial” blog response, followed by his “official” video response. Enjoy!
(Flip to the next page to see Brian Zulberti’s risqué pictures, which we’ve tastefully redacted.)