The Struggle: Will Alcoholism Treatment Affect Your Character And Fitness Review?

Law students to be able to access alcoholism recovery support without of the fear of being denied a license to practice law.

alcohol and sorrowWelcome to the latest installment of The Struggle, a series where we examine the mental-health issues that students encounter during the oftentimes grueling law school experience. We are posting these stories because sometimes what law students really need is to know that they’re not alone in their pain. Sometimes what law students need is to know that they’ve got a friend who is willing to share not just in their triumphs, but also in their struggles. These are real e-mails and messages we’ve received from real readers.

If these issues resonate with you, please reach out to us. Your stories need to be heard. You can email us, text us at (646) 820-8477, or tweet us @atlblog. We will share your stories anonymously. You may be able to help a law student who needs to know that someone else has been there before and survived.


Hi, my name is [redacted], and I am in recovery from alcoholism and depression. Less than a year ago, I would have never imagined uttering those words. Depression was not even on my radar, and how could I possibly have a drinking problem? At 25 years old, I was in my third year of law school, and successfully interning at two different legal organizations. On the outside, I had my life together. However, on the inside, I was really struggling.

In order to better explain “my law school struggle,” I need to briefly explain my past. I grew up in a loving family but also in a family who buried emotions – the “pull yourself up by your own bootstraps” mentality. Growing up, my idea of strength was suffering in silence. It wasn’t until a family tragedy occurred right before law school that I even contemplated seeking outside help. However, I quickly dismissed the idea of mental health therapy, as I was afraid of how that could negatively affect my future legal career. Therefore, I continued to suffer in silence and began law school with unresolved grief and trauma issues. Moreover, while I was a social drinker before law school, my drinking greatly increased during law school, as I was now turning to alcohol as a way to cope with my emotions and the increased stress and pressure I was faced with on a daily basis as a law student.

By my second year of law school, I was suffering from depression and I began abusing alcohol in an attempt to “get happy.” However, self-medicating with alcohol only increased my depression and by my third-year in law school, I became suicidal and developed signs of alcoholism. While I functioned during the day, my evenings and weekends were spent binge drinking alone in my apartment. I no longer saw the point of living and drank myself into a stupor on multiple occasions. At this point, I knew I needed help but I was too afraid and ashamed to admit it.

Finally, I confided in a mentor who urged me to seek help and I listened. While I was fearful that mental health and addiction treatment could negatively impact my admission to the bar, I knew I had to address these issues before I started my legal career – my life was at risk. Therefore, right before my law school graduation, and to the surprise of my friends and family, I electively entered a thirty-day impatient treatment program for mental health and alcohol addiction.

Today, I am over nine months sober and I can honestly say my life is now worth living. For the first time in a long time, I am happy and healthy. Unfortunately, I cannot say my journey to health, happiness, and sobriety has been an easy one. It has taken a lot of self-care, mental health therapy, and recovery support to get to this point.

A year after graduating from law school, I have finally gathered enough self-care tools and mental health support in order to confidently embark on the bar exam. In tune with my initial worries, I had to disclose my alcoholism and mental health treatment on the bar application. If I receive a passing score, the board of bar examiners will further investigate my character and fitness before they can admit me to practice. I honestly have no idea what the future holds, but my hope is that the legal community sees how imperative and necessary it is for law students to be able to access mental health and recovery support without of the fear of being denied a license on character and fitness grounds.


Most colleges and universities have counseling and psychological services resources that students can turn to if they are in crisis or would like counseling, even after hours. If these services are not available at your school, and if you’re depressed and in need help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) or a lawyer assistance program in your state. Remember that you are loved, so please reach out if you need assistance, before it’s too late.


Sponsored

Staci Zaretsky is an editor at Above the Law. Feel free to email her with any tips, questions, or comments. Follow her on Twitter or connect with her on LinkedIn.

Sponsored