Bullying

Should the NFL be subject to the same laws as any other business given its unique character?

Guess the lawyers will sort out whatever happened between Richie Ingonito and Jonathan Martin.

Parent accuses 91-0 high school football victors of "bullying."

* Saudi Arabia may soon end beheadings because they’re running out of swordsmen. Poor Ned Stark… if he’d just held out a little longer. [Lowering the Bar] * Professor Richard Epstein held an AMA (“Ask Me Anything” if you’re behind on the modern lingo of the Interwebs) on Reddit this morning. Mercifully, “Boxers of Briefs?” wasn’t asked. [Reddit] * It may have taken awhile for Steubenville, Ohio to get its priorities straight, but Attorney General Mike DeWine is finally saying the right things, “Let me be clear. Threatening a teenage rape victim will not be tolerated. If anyone makes a threat verbally or via the Internet, we will take it seriously, we will find you, and we will arrest you.” [Jezebel] * Is the legal industry ready to seize the future? [Adam Smith, Esq.] * If you have any questions you’d like to see addressed by our crack advice team at Pls Hndle Thx, send them to advice@abovethelaw.com. [Above the Law] * David Bernstein posted this clever video about Passover to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody over at Volokh Conspiracy. You can watch it after the jump….

Emily Bazelon thinks Stephen Colbert just might be a bully.

* DC Comics didn’t take kindly to a garage selling replica Batmobiles without permission. A federal court agreed. But if we outlaw Batmobiles, only outlaws will have Batmobiles! [Comic Book Resources] * Mistrial in Philadelphia after the witness lost (part of) his head on the witness stand. [Philly.com] * Taser or Lightsaber? I never thought that would be a serious question. [Legal Juice] * A quick refresher from that “Law and the Vatican” course you took as a 3L. [WSJ Law Blog] * A compilation of some bad courtroom (and quasi-courtroom) behavior including our friend from last week, Penelope Soto. [LOL and Smile] * The Bratz case is so totally over. The result? A whole lot of nothing — much like the Bratz movie. [The Recorder] * Shorter version of this article: Morpheus explaining, “But when you’re inside, you look around, what do you see?…The very minds of the [nice legal academics] we are trying to save. But until we do, these [law professors] are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy.” [Inside the Law School Scam] * New Mexico is considering a new law against bullying — but does it go too far? Does it? Answer me, you little wuss! [Volokh Conspiracy]

* George Washington University has been stripped of its U.S. News college ranking. The law school appears safe. [Tax Prof Blog] * Now students can get in trouble for bullying their teachers. Teachers, people! TEACHERS CAN’T STAND UP TO THE MEAN SCHOOL KIDS WITHOUT A LAWSUIT. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * Just to be clear, Antonin Scalia would not be on the side of the secessionists. [New York Personal Injury Law Blog] * So the accuser of Kevin Clash, voice of Elmo, recanted and said that he was a consenting adult when he was with Clash. It’s great to know that Elmo is getting barely legal ass. [Huffington Post] * FCPA! Guidance! This is WAY MORE INTERESTING than Petraeus and the Kelley sisters. [WSJ Law Blog] * For those of you who saw Capturing the Friedmans, here’s an update on the ongoing proceedings. [WiseLawNY]

Bullying is what happens when teachers lose control...

* Are associates or partners more maniacally stressed out? Science helps us answer the age-old question. [The Careerist] * What does it take to land a Supreme Court clerkship? Luck, reputation, and a helluva lot of patience. [ABA Journal and Supreme Ambitions] * And what should SCOTUS clerks do after they finish at One First Street if they want to make the most money? The answer may surprise you. [Breaking Views] * As the NFL faces all those concussion lawsuits, America’s other professional football league (yes, the United Football League does exist) is getting sued… for not paying its players. [Forbes] * An HLS student pleaded not guilty to sexual assault. What is it with all the Harvard Law folks allegedly causing trouble this week? Next thing you know, some Harvard Law grad is going to threaten to murder Big Bird. [Harvard Crimson] * A veteran is suing the government over his frostbitten penis, which had to be “partially amputated.” Not only is that the second-worst thing I’ve ever heard, it doesn’t even really make sense. [ABC15] * An ex-law student explains why she quit just a few weeks into the semester. Why? Bullying and backstabbing. Hmmm. That sounds familiar. [A Nerd Girl's Perspective] * Delaware Bar Exam results are out. Congratulations to everyone who passed! [Delaware State Courts]

As it turns out, the man who critiqued the Wisconsin TV anchor's appearance was a lawyer. What does that say about lawyers, in general?

States consider legislation restricting workplace bullying. It might not be a bad idea....

A federal court hands down a ruling restricting how schools can use social media against students.

Is Chris Christie a bully? If so, is it because he used to be a U.S. Attorney?

Dharun Ravi just got sentenced. What did he get?

* Andrew Sweat claims fear of concussions made him hang ‘em up and go to law school. I’m not saying he shouldn’t be scared of football, I’m saying he should be worried about law school, too. [Deadspin] * Studying for the LSAT helps your brain. No really. It can even make you smart enough to avoid law school all together. [LSAT Blog: Ace the LSAT] * Looks like Jamie Dimon decided to send in The Wolf. [Dealbreaker] * How famous do I have to be before weight loss companies compete to make me take their diets for free (plus hire me a personal trainer) so they can say their weight loss program “works”? Surely, I’m fat enough. [WSJ Law Blog] * Instead of making laws against bullying, parents could also be less lazy and just learn how to use Facebook. [Orlando Sentinel] * Lawyer on lawyer name-calling. [Legal Newsline] * Hey, you’re going to be able to buy liquor on Sundays in Connecticut. Cool. Good to see that laws based entirely on weird, religious tradition are being found to be stupid. [WTNH] * This is a fun time to think about law firm branding, don’t you think? Sorry, let me make that a little more clear: Dewey think this is a fun time to think about law firm branding? [Law and More] * Looking ahead to the Facebook IPO in Blawg Review, which is also posted on Facebook this week. [Preaching to the Perverted via Blawg Review]

* The Am Law numbers are out. PPP is up 3 percent. Dollar, dollar bill y’all. [American Lawyer] * Hasbro — the makers of Nerf guns, a.k.a. the best toys ever — apparently hired some Baker & McKenzie attorneys to intimidate a guy who runs an Australian Nerf fan site. I hope they “intimidated” him with Nerf guns, because it would be funny, and no one would actually get hurt. [Crikey] * At 85 years old, Congressman (and Georgetown Law grad) John Dingell learned that “teabagging” doesn’t mean what he thinks it means. Better late than never! [The Daily Dolt] * I’m surprised that there are enough businesses horrible brave enough to ask for potential employees’ personal electronic information that it necessitates legislation. But I’m not complaining. [RedTape / MSNBC] * Finding out that repeated concussions and head injuries may cause long-term brain damage is only surprising to people who have suffered repeated concussions and head injuries. [LexisNexis] * A 14-year-old Georgia girl and her parents have sued some of her classmates because they acted like bitches on Facebook. Are these girls bullies? Yep. Is it the proper solution to turn the situation into 90210: Courtroom Edition? I still don’t think so. [Threat Level / Wired] * Support local businesses, like your high-end neighborhood brothel. The Manhattan Madam is now accepting donations… to help her make bail by Mother’s Day. [Dealbreaker]

The ACLU is defending three teenage girls who were expelled for saying on Facebook that they wanted to kill people. Here's why they shouldn't have been expelled…

* Here’s a reason why Proskauer Rose and Chadbourne & Parke might skip out on spring bonuses this year: millions of dollars worth of blowback from Allen Stanford’s Ponzi scheme. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

* And speaking of spring bonuses, a lot of people noticed that Sullivan & Cromwell seems to have misled associates. “Just because it hasn’t happened yet, doesn’t mean it won’t.” Yeah, right. [Am Law Daily]

* Next up in the war on women: a senator from Idaho thinks that women are such strumpets that they might be lying their way into abortions by claiming rape. Because that’s not incredibly insensitive. [Washington Post]

* Apparently George Zimmerman, the man accused of fatally shooting a boy armed with a pack of Skittles, wanted to become a police officer. Looks like it’s time to kiss that dream goodbye. [Los Angeles Times]

* Give me your lunch money, kid! Teachers aren’t supposed to be bullying students, but that’s what one Baltimore mother is alleging in a $200K lawsuit against the city’s school board. [New York Daily News]

* Here’s a nice round-up of some of the most controversial laws that will be enacted in 2012. Looks like California is going to have some fabulously multicultural litigation. [Associated Press] * What do you get when you cross an artist with a penchant for Rastafarians with the son of a Boies Schiller name partner? […]

Earlier this week, the Michigan Senate passed anti-bullying legislation that included an exception that allowed religious nuts to bully gay kids if they wanted to. The Michigan Senators who voted for the bill wouldn’t characterize it that way, but let’s just say those jackasses won’t be hosting the Oscars, either. Yesterday, the Michigan House also […]