Depressing Things
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Admin, Biglaw, Health Care / Medicine, Old People, Partner Issues
The Lament of a Thirty-Something
It occurs to Elie Mystal that, once again, he's in much better shape for this new phase of consequences -- getting older -- than he would be if he were still at a Biglaw firm. Because while Mystal needs to refine and hone his skills in his mid and late thirties, associates at top law firms need to gun it. They need to take their suddenly aging bodies and turn every morsel of ATP into billable hours if they want to make partner. And they need to do it now.... -
Biglaw, In-House Counsel, Job Searches, Law Schools, Old People, Student Loans
Fall into the Gap
A generation gap has opened in the legal world. On one side there are lawyers over 50, for whom law still looks like a safe, reliable ladder to the upper-middle-class. From the other side — where their kids are perched — law more closely resembles un ascenseur pour l’échafaud… - Sponsored
The Ethical use of Generative AI
What’s the key to empowering your legal team with the efficiency and insight of AI while protecting the integrity of their work? Read this article… -
Cars, Deaths, Drinking, Midsize Firms / Regional Firms
Associate Killed in Dramatic Drunken Car Crash
Last night, a dramatic scene unfolded in the parking lot of a movie theater. A suspected drunk driver allegedly took off without his headlights on, hit two police cruisers, terrified several witnesses, and then slammed his car into a tree, killing himself. The driver was a graduate of a top law school and an associate at a law firm....
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Bankruptcy, Money, Quote of the Day, Student Loans
Quote of the Day: In Five Years, Don't Say We Didn't Warn You
Take it from those of us on the frontline of economic distress in America. This could very well be the next debt bomb for the U.S. economy. — William E. Brewer Jr., president of the National Association of Consumer Bankruptcy Attorneys, commenting on a new national survey of 860 bankruptcy lawyers. Surveyed lawyers expressed […] -
Bankruptcy, Law Schools, Money, Student Loans
Not Even Bankruptcy Will Make Your Student Loans Go Away
More and more law school graduates are trying to seek bankruptcy protection from their mountains of student loan debt. Now, we know that reading comprehension is tested on the LSAT, but apparently, once students complete the law school entrance exam, that skill goes right out the window. How do we know? Because law school graduates, who freely signed up for student loans as law students, are now trying to shirk their repayment responsibilities.... -
Law Schools, Libraries / Librarians
Adventures at Low-Ranked Law Schools: Don't Call It a 'Toilet,' They Don't Even Have Toilets
Elie Mystal has never been a fan of U.S. News obsessing over how much money law schools spend on their facilities, but maybe all you need to know about the difference between top law schools and not-so-hot law schools really does come down to toilets. At Harvard, they name them after rich alumni. At North Dakota Law School, they barely have them.... -
Career Alternatives, Job Searches, Law Schools
Is Your Career Services Office This Lazy?
The lack of effort put in by career services professionals at the nation's law schools really seems to be out of hand. When you can't even trust your CSO to effectively cull Symplicity to remove stupid and insulting job prospects like the ones below, it's time to change the entire approach to law school career services.... -
Banking Law, Career Alternatives, Job Searches, Law Schools
Things You Can Do With a Law Degree: Bank Teller
Last week, Elie derisively noted that legal blogs were pushing a silly story in U.S. News about great careers that you can pursue with a law degree. No matter how bad legal hiring gets, law schools like pushing the "you can do anything with a law degree" angle, based on the anecdotal evidence of those who were lucky enough to parlay their J.D. degrees into something non-legal. Obviously, Elie's got some anecdotes of his own. But here's a job, a real live job, that's actually being offered to law students as we speak (or type). If you really want to know "what you can do with a law degree," take a freaking look.... - Sponsored
Mitigating M&A Cyber Risk: Pre- & Post-Acquisition Due Diligence
Why M&A cybersecurity due diligence? -
Biglaw, Job Searches, Law Schools, Partner Issues, Partner Profits, Wall Street Journal, White & Case
Biglaw's New Normal Isn't Great For New Talent
As we mentioned in Morning Docket yesterday, the Wall Street Journal has a good article about how various recession-era cutbacks have become entrenched in Biglaw. If you have been paying attention or are a current law student, you know the issues: smaller entry-level classes, stagnant salaries, and a partnership track long enough to make a first-year Ph.D. student laugh. Other industries use economic downturns to retool their business models and develop new ways to compete. Not Biglaw.... -
Cheapness, Department of Justice, Federal Government, Job Searches, Money, U.S. Attorneys Offices, Unemployment
The DOJ Wants You, Experienced Attorneys -- To Work for Free
U.S. Attorney's Offices around the country have been posting unpaid Special Assistant United States Attorney positions for some time now. We covered them last May. David Lat defended the SAUSA gigs, arguing that the nonpaying jobs might not be as bad as they seem. It's fun, exciting work, and it provides valuable experience and serious professional credibility. There is a crucial, ominous difference between then and now, though. Previous SAUSA jobs were generally aimed at entry-level or fairly junior attorneys. Now we've got a recent opening that's asking for more.… -
Career Alternatives, Job Searches, Law Schools, Student Loans
What 'Can't' You Do With a Law Degree?
There's a really funny post up on Constitutional Daily, in which the protagonist -- who holds a J.D. from NYU Law and was laid off from Biglaw during the recession -- recounts his inability to secure a job at Target. It got us thinking of that other great lie that law schools tell incoming law students: "Yada yada, you can do anything with a law degree... also, I'd like to interest you in partial ownership of the Brooklyn Bridge." But many J.D. holders have found out the hard way that holding a law degree only opens doors to "law" jobs. They aren't degrees of general utility. If anything, they close more doors than they open.... -
Job Searches, Law School Deans, Law Schools, Student Loans, Vanderbilt
Law School Transparency: Who's Naughty and Who's Nice?
Late last year, plaintiffs’ lawyer David Anziska pledged to make 2012 “the year of law school litigation.” Anziska, who’s currently spearheading efforts to sue law schools over allegedly misleading employment statistics, told my colleague Staci Zaretsky that he and his team members “want to sue as many law schools as we can to bring them […] -
Biglaw, Job Searches, Law Schools, Layoffs, Unemployment
More Evidence That The Legal Job Market Is In Terrible Shape
Yesterday, the Atlantic was the messenger reminding you of the serious financial peril involved in starting a legal career. Yeah folks, even in 2011, the legal economy was still shedding jobs. But it's not like law schools were spitting out fewer graduates, so... you do the math. Here, the Atlantic has put things in a fancy chart. Pictures people, it'll be like an LSAT game: how many people made a terrible investment in higher education?
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Mitigating M&A Cyber Risk: Pre- & Post-Acquisition Due Diligence
Why M&A cybersecurity due diligence?
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New Report - Are Small Firms Achieving Their Legal Tech Goals?
In this new report of more than 100 professionals at small and smaller midsize law firms, iManage and Above the Law shed new light on…
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How To Maximize Productivity With Westlaw Precision With CoCounsel
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Biglaw, Bonuses, Clerkships, Federal Government, Money, Paralegals, Secretaries / Administrative Assistants
A Shout-Out to All The Legal Types Getting a $0 Bonus This Holiday Season
Our bonus coverage only deals with those few, those happy few, who are lucky enough to receive any type of bonus whatsoever. For many in and around Biglaw, their bonus this year will be $0. We're talking about paralegals. We're talking about secretaries. We're talking about government lawyers and law clerks and a bunch of other people who worked really hard in 2011 and might get no bonus at all. We feel your pain.... -
Crime, Holidays and Seasons, In-House Counsel, Politics, Violence
House Rules: Holidays, Half Empty - Half Full
Disclaimer: I know this is usually an in-house column with tips and tidbits about being a corporate attorney, but there have already been numerous columns about how to network (or not) through the holidays, how to prepare for the next billable year, and how to act at a party. I’m using today’s column to very […] -
Biglaw, In-House Counsel, Job Searches, Partner Issues
Inside Straight: A Partner's Lament
In-house columnist Mark Herrmann considers the plight of the big firm partner. You succeeded at law school, succeeded at your law firm, have hot and cold running associates at your disposal, are being paid the riches of Croesus every year, and are perceived by the world as being wonderfully successful. What the heck are you complaining about? -
California, Elena Kagan, Immigration, Money, Morning Docket, Partner Issues, Pornography, SCOTUS, Student Loans, Supreme Court
Morning Docket: 12.13.11
* The Supreme Court will hear Obama’s challenge to Arizona’s immigration law. Upside: we can probably expect a decision by June. Downside: Lady Kaga has to sit her ass out. [New York Times] * Depressing fact of the day: unless you’re earning six times your law school’s annual tuition, you’ll probably never be able to […]
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Food, Job Searches, Law Schools
Law School Claims Potato Chip Tester/Taster Job Was Fictitious
On Friday, we brought you what could be classified as one of the worst law jobs of all time: a job as an unpaid potato chip tester/taster. And much like the side effects of eating an Olestrafied potato chip, the law school in question has announced that the notorious job was full of crap.... -
Food, Job Searches, Law Schools
Once You Pop, You Can't Stop: New Law School Job Post Borders on Absurd
Here at Above the Law, we write all the time about crappy law job postings. We recently received word about a law school career services job posting that was so horrendous, so ridiculous, that we could not help ourselves but to write about it. After all, writing about crappy law jobs is like opening a can of Pringles: once you pop, you can't stop. And this job -- well, let's just say that it takes the cake, or the potato chip, as the case may be.... -
Job Searches, Law Schools, Romance and Dating
Law Student Breaks Up With His Law School
At some point law students have to take responsibility for their own choices in professional schools. There really is enough information floating around on the internet warning potential law students about what they are getting into. At this point in time, if you believe what American legal education is trying to sell you, it's your own damn fault....