Dewey & LeBoeuf

Dinesh D’Souza

* The United States is launching air strikes against ISIS in Syria and Iraq, but some have been compelled to wonder whether it’s legal under international law. Of course it’s legal, under the Rule of ‘MERICA, F*CK YEAH! [BBC]

* Dewey know whether this failed firm’s former COO can get out of paying $9.3M to its bankruptcy trustee? Dewey know whether we’ll ever be able to stop using this pun? Sadly, the answer to both questions is no. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Marc Dreier of the defunct Dreier LLP has been ordered to testify in person in his firm’s bankruptcy case in Manhattan, but he’d rather stay in the comforts of his prison home in Minnesota. Aww. [Bloomberg]

* Dinesh D’Souza won’t have to do hard prison time for his campaign-finance violations. Instead, he’ll be spending eight months in a “community confinement center,” which sounds just peachy. [New York Times]

* Northwestern Law is launching a campaign to fundraise $150M to be spent on an endless supply of Chick-fil-A sandwiches financial aid for students and curriculum improvements. [National Law Journal]

Jodi Arias says, ‘You could own these!’

* If you want to know why Justice Sonia Sotomayor’s summer was “really not fun,” it’s because she spent it reading a book about Justice Antonin Scalia and a book written by Justice John Paul Stevens. [Washington Whispers / U.S. News & World Report]

* “There is less money to pay everybody.” Corporations are shifting more and more of their legal work to their in-house lawyers, and some law firms — especially smaller ones — are feeling the financial squeeze. [WSJ Law Blog]

* If you’ve wanted to know what federal judges discuss during their bathroom breaks, stop wondering, because it’s not that exciting. All they talk about is their “stupid little trials,” and get overheard by jurors and forced into disclosures. [New York Daily News]

* Dewey know why the former leaders of this failed firm want their criminal indictment dismissed? It’s because the case is allegedly based on a “flagrant misunderstanding of the law.” [New York Law Journal]

* If you want to own a “piece of history,” Jodi Arias is auctioning off the glasses she wore during the first phase of her murder trial. She intends to donate the proceeds of the sale to (her own?) charity. [Daily Mail]

Judge Jill Pryor

* Mathew Martoma, the former Harvard law student who fabricated his transcript when applying for clerkships, gets nine years in prison for insider trading. [DealBook / New York Times]

* If Bingham McCutchen moves forward on merger talks with Morgan Lewis, a bunch of Bingham partners might bail. [American Lawyer]

* Congratulations to Judge Jill Pryor, who will join Judge Bill Pryor on the Eleventh Circuit. [Fulton County Daily Report]

* Can you be fired for medical marijuana in Colorado, where the drug is legal even for recreational purposes? [ABA Journal]

* Dewey have some good news for the embattled ex-leaders of the defunct law firm? [New York Law Journal]

* Home Depot is the latest major retailer to be hit by a data breach. [Washington Post]

‘That’ll be $27,000… XOXO, Dentons’

* Let’s get ready to rumble! Not wanting to be left out of the party, Oklahoma has also asked the Supreme Court to take a look at its same-sex marriage statute which was recently slapped down by the Tenth Circuit. [National Law Journal]

* Dewey know what financial restructuring adviser Joff Mitchell of Zolfo Cooper said to this failing firm’s partners right before it flopped for good? “Look, there is no way here to save this firm.” Ouch. That had to have sucked. [Forbes]

* The examiner who was appointed to monitor law firm billing for the City of Detroit’s bankruptcy is now questioning Dentons’ fees of up to $27K per month to talk to the press. Whoa there… [Detroit Free Press]

* Working Mother and Flex-Time Lawyers have released the latest ranking of the Top 50 Law Firms for Women. Vivia Chen feels “a bit dirty” after reading the list — and you probably should, too. [The Careerist]

* Leisure Suit Larry’s successors are here to stay for a while: Case Western Reserve Law’s co-interim deans will stay on in their current positions for the upcoming school year. [Crain's Cleveland Business]

* Nothing demands a SWAT team like a 90-year-old woman. [Lowering the Bar]

* Not so much legal, but here’s Princeton Review’s ranking of the best and worst colleges. If you’re looking for hard liquor, head to Iowa City. [TaxProf Blog]

* Dewey know what Al Togut’s going to say about law firm bankruptcies. Yeah, I know, but we’re just going to keep riding this pun. [Forbes]

* Corruption in New Orleans? Hold on, I need a second to let this sink in. [The Times-Picayune]

* Be sure to come by Betterment on Wednesday to hear from a panel of general counsel about the transition to in-house work for a startup company. [Above the Law]

* The CFPB is cracking down on debt-collecting law firms. So if you’re a bottom-feeder, the government is coming for you. [Gawker]

Kid Rock

* Yesterday afternoon, two of D&L’s former executives quietly settled a clawback suit filed by Alan Jacobs, the firm’s bankruptcy trustee. Dewey know how much Messrs. Sanders and DiCarmine had to pay the piper? [WSJ Law Blog]

* GrayRobinson is the latest firm to hop aboard the medical marijuana bandwagon by launching its own regulated products practice group. Lawyers will soon puff, puff, pass around those lovely billable hours. [Daily Business Review]

* Pain at the pump apparently extends to this gas giant’s résumé dumps. A suit alleging bias in ExxonMobil’s hiring moves forward thanks to the Illinois Human Rights Commission. [Washington Blade]

* Facebook’s founder Mark Zuckerberg will be testifying against Paul Ceglia in court to prove that the alleged huckster faked a contract that claimed he owned more than half the company. Like. [Bloomberg]

* It seems that Kid Rock has been subpoenaed over a glass sex toy that was supposedly given to him by a former Insane Clown Posse employee. Kid Rock is probably thrilled to be in the news again. [MLive.com]

No one has getting indicted on their bucket list. No one sends word of their indictment to their alumni magazine.

That said, if you’re going to get indicted, it’s a whole lot better to be charged in state court in New York than in federal court anywhere else in the country, in at least one way.

The criminal case about the implosion of Dewey & LeBoeuf shows why. Last week, the folks charged in the Dewey meltdown filed a number of motions to dismiss the indictment. Everyone but Zachary Warren filed an omnibus motion to dismiss. Steve DiCarmine filed his own motion that was so, well, something that it contained Above the Law’s quote of the day. Zachary Warren filed a separate motion. There’s some great stuff in all of the pleadings about the government’s case.

What’s perhaps less obvious to those of us who do white-collar criminal defense but don’t normally practice in state court in New York is that, according to the law as set out in these papers, New York state is a magical Shangri-la of due process compared to federal court.

How?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “New York Is A Great Place To Be Indicted”

Stephen DiCarmine as the Annoying Orange

[T]he insatiable greed of some of those [equity] partners and the decision of some partners to jump ship when the going got rough were major causes of D&L’s collapse, not Steve DiCarmine’s actions.

– Attorney Austin V. Campriello of Bryan Cave, arguing on behalf of Stephen DiCarmine, Dewey & LeBoeuf’s former executive director, in a memorandum in support of his client’s motion to dismiss the indictment.

(Keep reading to see DiCarmine’s entertaining memorandum in full.)

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Dewey Defendant Suggests Prosecution’s Confusion As To ‘Very Basic Law School Stuff’”

* Congrats to William Voge, who was elected as the new chairman of Latham & Watkins. He succeeds Robert Dell in this position, who is one of the Am Law 100′s longest-serving leaders. [Am Law Daily]

* Dewey’s former execs filed a motion to dismiss their criminal charges, lamenting the fact that the Manhattan DA made them “scapegoats” for the total failure of their firm. [DealBook / New York Times]

* A judge banned the Washington Redskins name from his court, proclaiming that the offensively monikered team shall be known only as “the Washington Team” in documents submitted. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid thinks that if it were up to Judge Judy, House Speaker John Boehner’s “show trial” suit against President Obama would be thrown out in “half a second.” Well then. [ABC News]

* A Michigan attorney was arraigned yesterday on a felony charge of homicide-solicitation of murder. It seems that the hired hitman warned his target. He’s not getting a good Yelp review. [UpNorthLive.com]

* If you’re an international student with a foreign law degree trying to get a law degree in the U.S., why the hell would you waste your money on a J.D.? Just get an LL.M. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

* Oh baby8: Nadya Suleman (formally doing business as Octomom) pleaded no contest to welfare fraud charges after she failed to report income from all of her public appearances and porn videos. [Reuters]

Teresa Giudice is sorry she’s not sorry.

* Dewey think Joel Sanders and Steve DiCarmine, former head honchos of the failed firm D&L, have a friend in the District Attorney’s office? Even their opponents in their criminal case want their civil case stayed. [WSJ Law Blog]

* “They’re literally dancing in the streets in Cleveland.” Frederick Nance, Cleveland-based regional managing partner of Squire Patton Boggs and lawyer to King LeBron, couldn’t be more thrilled that his client is returning to the Cleveland Cavaliers. Hooray for hometown billables. [Am Law Daily]

* Tracy Morgan filed a lawsuit against Walmart over the fatal car wreck that killed his friend and left him with numerous broken bones. We suppose his injuries will prevent him from getting girls pregnant. [CNN]

* The NYLS grad who founded an imperiled cupcakery dropped enough Crumbs to lead investors to her rescue. Now the bakeshop has enough cash to make it through bankruptcy. [DealBook / New York Times]

* Fabulicious? Teresa Giudice, the Real Housewife of New Jersey who pleaded guilty to fraud charges last year, is awaiting sentencing of up to 27 months, but isn’t sure she regrets what she did. [New York Post]

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