Fantasy Sports

Non-Sequiturs: 11.16.11

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* Happy American Censorship Day! Sign these petitions in celebration so you can keep your internet the way you like it — full of infringing and fabulous content. [Volokh Conspiracy]

* A prospective law student got married at Zuccotti Park this weekend. Best protest wedding ever? I guess the honeymoon ended after they were evicted. [The Stir]

* Before you waste your tears crying over how much your fantasy team sucks, you should probably check and see whether it’s even legal to play. [Legal Blitz]

* Chase is giving away over $3M in grants for small charities, so why not take a second and vote for our friends over at Ms. JD? [Chase Community Giving]

* Using free beer to lure criminals into an arrest trap should be a violation of your right against self-incrimination. They should at least be able to drink it before the cuffs go on. [Legal Blog Watch]

* Have you ever wondered why barristers wear black? Yeah, neither have I. [Futility Closet]

* The attorneys for Justin Bieber’s alleged baby mama, Mariah Yeater, have pulled out. Just like the Biebs should’ve done. Allegedly. [Improper]

* Regular twelve-step programs are for the uninspired. Here’s one that only true professionals will be able to survive. [Constitutional Daily]

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Are You Ready for Some Fantasy Football?

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You know fantasy football has taken over the American consciousness when a fake lawyer threatening fake sanctions in an ad campaign makes the news. This morning the ABA Journal ran a profile of Norman Tugwater, a fantasy sports lawyer played by Gary Busey:

“I’m getting ready to clean up with the mop of justice,” Tugwater proclaims in his YouTube video. “If you refuse to pay our athletes, we’ll come find you, and squeeze it out of you like a tube of toothpaste.”

Tugwater is actually actor Gary Busey, and his video is part of an ad campaign for VitaminWater. “I don’t think twice about coming after fantasy owners. In fact, I rarely think at all,” he writes on Twitter. He continues the taunts on Facebook, where he proclaims, “I wrote the book on fantasy sports law. I also have the only copy.”

That’s right, America is so into fantasy football that Gary Busey is getting work.

I’ve kept my head in the sand regarding fantasy football for a long time. But I can’t ignore it any longer. Let Gary Busey inspire you up below, and then join in ATL’s first reader-only fantasy football league…

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