* “If you love me you’ll pass this bill.” Sorry, Obama, but even the Democrats are busy washing their hair on this one. How about we pass a resolution like this instead? I’d totally love Obama for that. [New York Times]
* Gary Giordano, the man accused of killing his swinging gal pal in Aruba, has hired a new attorney. Apparently Jose Baez is now the go-to guy for defendants with shady pasts and even shadier alibis. [Daily Mail]
I have to do something I hate doing. I have to give Gloria Allred some publicity. Sure, I have to mention her only in order to say that I think she’s wrong and using the plight of women to further her own fame. But I still have to mention her, which is what she wants. It’s a great system she’s set up for herself: she wins even when people talk about how ridiculous she is.
But I can’t ignore Allred here because now she is messing with something near and dear to my heart: scantily clad cocktail waitresses in Atlantic City. That’s right, I live on the East Coast. That means I can’t easily get to Las Vegas or New Orleans. That means occasionally I have to go get my gambling fix in A.C. If you’ve never been to Atlantic City, imagine Vegas after the apocalypse: everything is broken and rundown and more desperate-looking. It’s pathetic. And you feel pathetic while you are there (until you start hitting some points and the table gets hot and you find yourself nailing a hard ten and it feels like the whole casino gives you a high five).
One casino was doing something about that depressing ambiance. It was getting rid of all of its old cocktail waitresses. Believe me when I tell you that this is an important move. Imagine sitting in A.C. down a grand at 4 a.m. and starting to think to yourself if there is any Swingers potential and then your watered-down drink comes back only it’s brought to you by a woman old enough to be your grandmother. And so instead of trying to figure out how to have sex with the waitress, you’re sitting there kind of thinking of how your mother would disapprove if she saw you in that moment. It’s enough to make you want to kill yourself.
It’s certainly enough to make you want to stop gambling. And now along comes Gloria Allred, trying to tell people that 50-year-old cocktail waitresses at casinos are still sexy, and can’t be fired….
Jonathan Rhys Meyers: More than just a pretty face; also an alleged tortfeasor.
* Gloria Allred is tired of Lindsay Lohan strutting her stuff into the courtroom like a debutante instead of a defendant. Chill out, Gloria. At least it’s actually LiLo’s stuff, unless that silicone was stolen, too. [New York Times]
* The ABA is thinking up ways for law schools to more creatively rig their nine-months-after-graduation employment rates. Burger flipping is a totally professional job, right? Right? [Morse Code / U.S. News]
* Actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers is getting sued for going to pound town with a United Airlines employee. No, not that pound town. It was actually a little more like ground and pound. [Daily Mail]
* Today in Racebaiting 101, we will learn about the comedic aptitude of white judges who refer to the KKK in plea agreements for young black men. Discuss. [Los Angeles Times]
* Well, the good news is that you’re not going to die from kidney failure. The bad news is that you’re going to die from AIDS. This story is like a bad bar exam question. [Wall Street Journal]
* David J. Stern is doing the dip on 9,000 foreclosure cases in Florida. He just doesn’t have the manpower to file the correct paperwork. How about you just robo-sign all those withdrawals, too? [Palm Beach Post]
When last we checked in on Debrahlee Lorenzana (pictured), she was switching lawyers to bring on a fellow media hog, Gloria Allred (recently the subject of a lengthy NYT profile). Over the weekend, Lorenzana filed her first papers under Allred’s stewardship.
Apparently we need to make a call to Geneva or something, and have them check out Citibank. FoxNY reports:
A tearful Debrahlee “Debbie” Lorenzana read a prepared statement Monday morning explaining why she is a victim of sex discrimination.
Lorenzana and her attorney, Gloria Allred, are asking for a human rights investigation. She claims she was fired from her job as a business banker job at Citibank after complaining that male colleagues called good looks distracting.
In other breaking news regarding workplace human rights violations, when I walked in today, I’m almost positive that a Breaking Media colleague thought “Whoa, that’s a big dude.” Nothing was said, but I saw it in her eyes. Can somebody text me the number for The Hague?
As part of a nationwide tour, Above the Law is coming to the great city of Chicago.
Join preeminent law firm management consultant Bruce MacEwen, Katten Muchin Chicago managing partner Gil Sofer, and JPMorgan Chase & Co. assistant general counsel Jason Shaffer for a panel discussion (sponsored by Pangea3) on the evolutionary and market forces bearing down on the law firm business model. Come on by Thursday, November 20, at 6 p.m., for thought-provoking discussion, food, drink, and networking.
Space is limited and there will be no on-site registration, so please RSVP
Average law school debt for graduates of private universities hovered around $122,000 last year. With only 57% of new attorneys actually obtaining real lawyer jobs, recent graduates have a lot to consider when it comes to managing their student loan payments. Thanks to our friends at SoFi, today’s infographic takes a look at student loan debt, including the possible benefits of refinancing for JDs…
Kinney Recruiting’sEvan Jowers is currently in Hong Kong for client meetings and still has a few slots available through October 22. Evan will also be in Hong Kong November 14 to December 15. Further, Robert Kinney has been in Frankfurt and Munich this week and is available for meetings with our Germany based readers.
One of our key law firm clients has referred us to one of their important clients in the US, Europe and China – a leading global technology supplier for the auto industry – in order to handle their search for a new Asia General Counsel and Asia Chief Compliance Officer.
Kinney is exclusively handling this in-house search.
This position will have a lot of responsibility and include supervision of eight attorneys underneath them in the Asia in-house team. The new hire will report directly to the global general counsel and global chief compliance officer, who is based in the US. The new hire’s ability to make judgement calls is going to be as important as their technical skill set background.
The position is based in Shanghai and will deal with the company’s operations all over Asia and also in India, including frequent acquisitions in the region.
It is expected that the new hire will come from a top US firm’s Shanghai, Beijing or Hong Kong offices, currently in a top flight corporate practice at the senior associate, counsel or partner level. Of course, the candidate can be currently in a relevant in-house role.