Oklahoma City

Well, Bausch and Lomb is finally being sold. Oh, there will be some time between now and the closing, but yesterday’s announcement of 800 million dollars in cost cutting would make any in-house attorney nervous.

The cuts are to come largely from the front office and management, all places where lawyers are part of the organization. I know several good people who face a period of real uncertainty as Valeant performs assessment after assessment of where cuts can be made, and then begins to swing the axe.

My town of Rochester has seen more than its fair share of decline in the last decade. Eastman Kodak is a shell of its former self, and now B&L is going to be owned by a Canadian concern; at least, if true to Canadian tradition, they’ll be “nice” about the cuts, right?

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Where would lawyers be without open (and absurdly expensive) access to Westlaw and Lexis-Nexis for legal research? They’d have to trudge down to the closest law library and read real books made of paper. They’d have to head over to the courthouse and pull actual files with non-electronic documents inside of them. In a time where legal texts are used solely for decorative bookshelf purposes, that is just too much to ask.

But that is the behavior that two lawyers would expect of their professional colleagues. As we mentioned in Morning Docket, they claim that the legal database providers have been engaging in “unabashed wholesale copying of thousands of copyright-protected works created by, and owned by, the attorneys and law firms who authored them.”

Do they have any chance of winning their class action copyright suit?

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Last week there appeared a column on this site that denigrated clerkships in the middle of the country. I could not decide if the author was attempting satire, but it seemed to be a straight piece. I would like to offer a counterpoint.

I began my career at Biglaw in New York City. The firm began to have troubles, and I saw the writing on the wall as my class dwindled from 40 to 30 to 20. I then heard from a family friend that a federal judge in Oklahoma City was looking for a clerk to assist with some topics with which I was familiar. I scored an interview, we hit it off, and I moved my wife and new baby to OKC for a year.

Full disclosure: I went to 15 schools before graduating high school, and OKC was the place I called “home.” Many decisions about this move were simple: it allowed us to live near family for a year, which was great support for the baby; my wife was working on her dissertation, so she had time to write; and I had a circle of friends from high school with whom I could reconnect.

Further simplifying the issue was that the government payscale is based solely on experience. How much did I earn, as a law firm associate turned law clerk?

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Back in January, we provided our readers with a brief glimpse into the life of an Oklahoma attorney named Amy McTeer. As a quick refresher, this lovely lady lawyer was arrested for filing a false police report while under the influence of crystal methamphetamine. Immediately prior, McTeer had racked up felony charges for allegedly assisting in her boyfriend’s escape from prison. You’re doin’ fine, Oklahoma! Oklahoma O.K.!

Just one month later, McTeer is back in the news with yet another arrest. This time, McTeer was charged with methamphetamine possession, public intoxication, and unlawful possession of drug paraphernalia after allegedly telling the police that a trucker had poisoned her pipe. The police reportedly found that “poisoned” pipe in her pocket — complete with white residue.

If you think this trainwreck of a story can’t get any worse, you’re wrong. Let’s take a look at what happened during McTeer’s arraignment, and view a compilation of McTeer’s photos in our Faces of Meth: Lawyer’s Edition….

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