Ponzi

Morning Docket: 09.21.11

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* Hey, Preet Bharara, even Lady Gaga can read your poker face when you’re going all in on an allegation of Full Tilt Ponzi. Maybe Lederer and Ferguson will finally fold. [Wall Street Journal]

* You know what this country really needs? More doctors who don’t believe in science. Another stem cell research case is going up to the D.C. Circuit. [Bloomberg]

* The last 9/11 wrongful death suit has been settled. Lessons learned: airport screeners might not know what Mace is, but they sure can lift and separate your balls. [New York Times]

* Cooley Law held a groundbreaking ceremony for its new campus. We’re good at surviving natural disasters, but a tsunami of unemployed lawyers might break this profession. [Miami Herald]

* A group of drag queens in Florida got busted for thieving the essentials — bras, boas, and butt pads. As RuPaul would say, you better work. Or steal. You know, whatever. [New York Daily News]

* Guys in my high school middle school used to have the ACLU file lawsuits over breathalyzer tests all the time. It was no big deal. [MSNBC]

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Morning Docket: 08.04.11

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Best un-Photoshopped picture ever?

* Dreamboard is a pretty sick concept for a child porn website, but pedophiles are pretty sick people. At least we busted most of them. [CNN]

* The reports of a possible settlement in the Robert Wone case turned out to be true. Too bad we’ll never know the terms of the deal. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Casey Anthony doesn’t have to return to Orlando because it’s about as dangerous for her to be there as it was for a toddler to be in her home. [People]

* As it turns out, a lawyer was behind the largest Ponzi scheme in the history of Arkansas. I guess that’s an accomplishment he can stick on his résumé. [Arkansas News]

* Sorry, Faye, but sometimes washed up movie stars get threatened with eviction. Even if their rent-controlled apartments are “really quite gross.” [Reuters]

* Thanks to a January incident at Osgoode Hall Law School, SlutWalk is coming to San Francisco. Say it loud, we’re sluts and we’re proud! [Huffington Post]

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Nothing About the Madoff Thing Surprises Any Mets Fans

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Mr. Met gives me bad touches every summer.

I’ve been avoiding writing about Irving Picard, the trustee in charge of getting money for the victims of the Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme, and his lawsuit against New York Mets owners Fred Wilpon and Saul Katz. It’s too painful. It’s like being close enough to see Oliver Perez’s face just as you know things are going to completely unravel but still hoping against hope that he’ll throw a strike. It’s like wondering if David Wright spends his nights crying softly while Mike Piazza texts him weekly updates on how many days he has until he’s an unrestricted free agent. I know what’s happening; I just don’t like to talk about it.

But, as we mentioned in Morning Docket, Picard’s massive complaint was made public today. He says Wilpon and Katz made $300 million in fictitious profits from business dealings with Madoff.

As you read through the allegations, try to remember how poorly the Wilpons make decisions about whom to hire, whom to fire, and how much to play baseball players — and then tell me if you are at all surprised by anything here…

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Breaking: Madoff Sentenced to 150 Years

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Bernie Madoff has been sentenced to 150 years.

Judge Denny Chin said that the sentence was necessary to deter other people from entering into these kinds of schemes.

The Judge apparently said that he was struck that there was no letter written in support of Bernie Madoff. On the other hand, the judge received 141 pages of letters from Madoff victims.

Madoff allegedly said:

They have accused me and my wife of not being sympathetic. She cries every night, I am also tormented.

Umm … crying doesn’t make you sympathetic. I think instead of turning on the waterworks, Madoff should try not stealing billions of dollars.

But Madoff did apparently say: “I am sorry.”

But the pitchfork rally doesn’t have to end here. Next up: what prison will Madoff be heading to? A “club-fed” facility, or someplace where Madoff might expect “more bareback.”

For extensive and ongoing coverage of L’Affaire Madoff, surf over to our sister site, Dealbreaker.

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