TSA

Non-Sequiturs: 06.10.13

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* The first rule of Insider Trading Club is, you do not send discoverable e-mails about Insider Trading Club. [Dealbreaker]

* Arnold & Porter staged a mock Olympics last time around. Now we’re just waiting for the other shoe to drop and we learn that the antitrust group was doping. [Washington Post]

* Georgetown Law student Bindhu Parmathi crowned Miss District of Columbia! She will go on this September to participate in the Miss America pageant (aka “The pageant that Donald Trump doesn’t own). [The Examiner]

* To recap: TSA took the stance that knives should be allowed on planes, but balked at fictional Jedi weapons. Yay America! [Lowering the Bar]

* Illinois passes some of the strictest fracking regulations in the country. That’s a reference to hydraulic fracturing. Not just dropping Battlestar Galactica references. [Breaking Energy]

* Indiana thinks it can discipline lawyers for criticizing a judge via private email. I would say that’s an insane misreading of the law, but I don’t want to get disciplined in Indiana, which sounds like the terrible prequel to Fifty Shades of Grey (affiliate link). [The Indiana Lawyer]

* Five businessmen take off their pants to protest taxes. This is a bad precedent. I don’t want to see any of these Tea Party folks take off their pants. [TaxProf Blog]

* Congrats to ATL reader Alicia Long, as well as co-author Jayne Jones, on publishing their new book Capitol Hell. [Amazon (affiliate links)]

* The Judge Edith Jones incident should raise the national concern to improve diversity on the bench. But it won’t. [Judicial Clerk Review]

* More follow-up on CBS’s improper campaign ad totally objective news documentary “Brooklyn D.A.” [New York Daily News]

* If fans in the front row of your concert start holding out papers for you to grab, DON’T DO IT! Unless you want to get sued. Video after the jump, courtesy of Gawker…

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Weapons On A Plane? TSA Says ‘Sure!’

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Feel free to put this back in your carry-on luggage.

It’s been a while since we’ve written about the anti-rights disaster that is the Transportation Security Administration. But they’re still there, still abusing people’s rights under the guise of “making us safer.”

Ironically, I’m writing about TSA today because they are relaxing their restrictions. The TSA has decided to allow small knives and golf clubs on the plane.

So, for those playing along at home, you still can’t have liquids over three ounces on the plane. But knives, you know, THE THINGS THAT THE TERRORISTS ACTUALLY USED TO TAKE OVER THE PLANES ON 9/11, are okay now….

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Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Technology-Enabled Fashion Apparel Designer

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These days, traveling for work can be a real pain thanks to the efforts of the Transportation Security Administration. With all of the electronic gadgets you may be carrying with you to your destination, having to unload and reload your bags and pockets during every business trip you make can get old, and quickly at that.

If only there were something — perhaps an article of clothing — that would allow you to carry everything you could possibly need, from work-related tech gear to personal items and more. All you’d have to do is take it off at security checkpoints and then be on your way without the usual hassle. Wouldn’t that be amazing?

As it turns out, that piece of clothing exists, and it was created by a former corporate and real estate lawyer….

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Non-Sequiturs: 12.26.12

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* Let’s be honest, if it wasn’t for 9/11, we’d already be allowed to leave our cellphones on during flights because before 9/11 we weren’t beaten and cowed by the rights abusing airline industry. [The Legal Satyricon]

* “The Child Support Lady” is the lady that helps Dads avoid paying child support by representing fathers. I think I’d prefer the child support lady who helps Dads avoid paying child support by passing out condoms. [Miami Herald]

* Check out his warning label on a doormat. [Overlawyered]

* Christmas isn’t a deadweight economic loss, because sometimes people surprise you. [Daily Beast]

* And now for the obligatory “look how lawyers would ruin Christmas if they could” posts. First, the oldie but goodie. [Tax Prof Blog]

* And now here’s an issue spotter about Santa Claus. [Constitutional Daily]

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Has The TSA Won?

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Happy Thanksgiving from the TSA.

I wish I could tell you that Americans fought the good fight, and the TSA let us be. I wish I could tell you that — but holiday travel is no fairy-tale world. We never said who did it, but we all knew. Things went on like that for awhile — travel consists of routine, and then more routine. Every so often, Americans would show up with fresh bruises. The TSA kept at us — sometimes we were able to fight ‘em off, sometimes not. And that’s how it went for American travelers — that was our routine.

Today is the biggest travel day of the year, and for another Thanksgiving, Americans will be doing it under the watchful eye of the Orwellian Transportation Security And Molestation Administration. The $8 billion dollar organization is alive, well, and entrenched. And nobody can accuse the freshly reelected Democratic president of doing anything to protect our civil liberties against the TSA. Nor has the supposedly liberty-loving Tea Party made aggressive groping at airports a major issue.

But for the most part, the country seems resigned to the TSA’s continued existence. Ooh, now kids under 12 don’t have to take off their shoes. Progress! We don’t sue them, we don’t legislate against them, we just kind of take it and hope that they decide to take their hands off our junk out of the kindness of their hearts.

We’ve got a couple of stories that, in their own way, highlight how cowed we’ve become….

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Non-Sequiturs: 10.17.12

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‘Folks, if you happen to see a damaged boat down there, please hit the flight attendant call button.’

* New York police just arrested a man for allegedly planning to blow up the Federal Reserve Bank. Thank you, officers. [CNN]

* This judge made a telecom executive cry in court. After the teary-eyed businesswoman stormed out, she re-entered the courtroom a short time later and “verbally assaulted” opposing counsel. That’s what I call a serious case of the Mondays. [New York Post]

* Much has been made about the terrible connections prostitution has to human trafficking, but what about the self-professed “hos” who, by all accounts, enjoy having sex for money? [East Bay Express]

* If you want to ride a mechanical bull, you should probably be aware that getting thrown off isn’t even a risk, it’s a veritable certainty. [Abnormal Use]

* I unabashedly dislike the TSA, but it seems these dummies had it coming. [Denver Post]

* Back to hating on the airline industry: “Sorry, folks, we’re going to be delayed arriving in Vancouver because of some weather issues… and because we have to detour for a moment and search for a missing yacht.” [Consumerist]

* Law blogger Eric Turkewitz’s face is all over a bunch of New York bus ads. And no, he’s not advertising himself. This story is actually pretty neat. [New York Personal Injury Attorney]

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Non-Sequiturs: 10.10.12

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Competitive wife-carrying. Seriously.

* SCOTUS decided not to hear the case about telecoms allegedly warrantlessly letting the NSA listen to your calls. So, does this mean we’re all on Candid Cellphone? [Threat Level / Wired]

* We mentioned the Harvard Law grad turned alleged scam artist, John Donald Cody (a.k.a. Mr. X), last week. Check out this cool story about how the feds tracked him down after years of searching. [Arizona Republic]

* A Finnish lawyer recently won the World Wife Carrying Championship, which is, I guess, exactly what it sounds like. Scandinavians are strange. [The Irreverent Lawyer]

* Everyone loves stories about old people accidentally growing drugs because they didn’t know what marijuana looks or smells like. Harkens back to simpler time! [Legal Juice]

* Now the TSA is apparently mistreating and humiliating terminal leukemia patients. Pardon the bluntness, but f**k you. Seriously. [San Francisco Chronicle]

* At least U.S.Customs Enforcement agents can still get their jobs done without disrespecting the sick and the old. Kudos for nabbing this dude flying in from Asia wearing body armor and carrying luggage full of weapons. The TSA folks should take notes. [ABC News]

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The TSA Needs to Inspect Your Airport Coffee — Yes, The Cup You Bought AFTER Going Through Security

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At this point, stuff like this doesn’t even make me mad. I’m just impressed. In a few years, I swear Ashton Kutcher will come out and that he’s been secretly working with the Transportation Security Administration on a new airport-themed reboot of Punk’d.

They dump grandpa’s ashes all over the floor. They accuse some guy of carrying a weapon, when it’s just his massive package. And now they apparently believe the massively overpriced, burnt Starbucks coffee you bought after getting ambiguously naked x-ray photos taken of you is SOMEHOW worth screening too.

[Stops to breathe]

OK. Let’s take a look. And, yes, OF COURSE we have video….

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Non-Sequiturs: 08.31.12

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Oh my god, he’s got a gun!

* Interim SLU Law Dean Tom Keefe said he’s nobody’s “butt boy.” Will that change if Father Lawrence Biondi succeeds in eliminating tenure? Your move, Keefe. [St. Louis Post-Dispatch]

* Defending one’s right to carry an AK-47 around a park is kind of like defending your right to drink milkshakes and eat waffle fries until your heart explodes. There’s no f**king point, other than really wanting to show you can. Except that milkshakes are delicious. Guns, not so much. [FindLaw]

* A penny saved is a penny earned grounds for a huge lawsuit. [Daily Business Review]

* Japan said Samsung didn’t infringe on Apple’s patents. Woooo. Three different Apple v. Samsung cases down, 10 million more countries to go. [Ars Technica]

* The TSA should seriously come out and say they just want to see us naked. Then at least we’d all be on the same page. [Threat Level / Wired]

* Ms. Spanjer, yeeeah, we’re sorry but you’re going to have to change your son’s name. As you’re probably aware, he’s deaf. I know, so sad. He’s a wonderful child, but when he signs his name, it looks like a gun. And, obviously, we have no tolerance for violence at this pre-school. [Jonathan Turley]

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Non-Sequiturs: 08.02.12

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It almost feels like John Quinn is the one on trial, instead of Apple and Samsung.

* Last year, the TSA was supposed to hold public hearings about those naked body scanners everyone loves so much, but they still haven’t done it (surprise, surprise). Now the D.C. Circuit is starting to get angry. [Wired / Threat Level]

* Is there really life, hope, and maybe even an associate position beyond doc review work? This writer thinks so. [Greedy Associates]

* Remember the man convicted of murder who claimed that “celebrity angels and demons” told him to do it? His mistress and coworker of has now been arrested and charged as well. [AJC]

* This is a comic strip about a bear who also happens to be a lawyer. It is silly but also surprisingly clever, and funny jokes abound. [Bear Lawyer]

* Apple fired back at John Quinn regarding his declaration in the Apple / Samsung trial, and then the company filed “an emergency motion for sanctions” with Judge Lucy Koh. I think everyone in this case needs to take a timeout and cool their jets for a while. [Bloomberg]

* I mean, the trial is so hostile, the parties can’t even agree on the name of the case. [All Things D]

* Who murdered Robert Wone? The mystery looms as large today as it did six years ago. [Who Murdered Robert Wone]

* Holy s**t, this is like a real-life, Chinese version of “I’m Oscar! Dot com!” [Slate]

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