Slaying Romance, Lawyer Style: A Romantic Valentine's Day Memorandum of Understanding

If you came to Above the Law for dating advice, you're doing it wrong.

Today is Valentine’s Day, and lawyers as Type-A creatures are wont to plan every aspect of their date in advance down to the very last detail. Mmm, what a mood killer. Some lawyers may take their planning to the extreme, and offer their dates the opportunity to become contractually obligated valentines.

And now there’s a solution for even the most uptight of legal eagles: you can go one step further and draft a memorandum of understanding as to each party’s obligations — before the date, during the date, and after the date, up to and including the shaving of “appropriate areas” (wink wink, nudge nudge).

If that’s not a total panty dropper, we don’t know what is….

We get it: if you’re reading Above the Law and trying to find dating tips, you’re probably not some kind of lawyerly Lothario. We’re more than happy to help you out. Since so many people emailed this to us, here’s the first half of a Valentine’s Day contract that’ll make your date get on his or her knees and beg for it (all to stop):

This thing covers it all, from the exchange of gifts to attire to approved topics of discussion. If you’re in desperate need of an agreement like this, you can send the full version to your valentine via Docracy.

Romantic Valentine’s Day Memorandum of Understanding [Docracy]

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Earlier: Be My Contractually Obligated Valentine

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