Court Kicks Supreme Court Justice To Curb In ‘Porngate’ Decision

UPDATE (10/27/14): Justice McCaffrey has now resigned.

A few weeks ago, Pennsylvania learned that its justice system spends all its time trading porn over the Internet when it isn’t taking kickbacks for wrongfully jailing children. This all came to light as part of the ongoing investigation into Why-Did-None-of-You-Do-Anything-About-Jerry-Sanduskygate because of course it did. You can’t be expected to do anything about an inveterate child molester when you’ve got one hand… well, doing other things.

The investigation found its way to the Pennsylvania Supreme Court, where Justice Seamus McCaffrey received around 60 of these emails and forwarded at least 8 to someone at the AG’s office.

As of yesterday, Justice McCaffrey is temporarily out of a job courtesy of a salacious Per Curiam Order denouncing the alleged traffic in “highly demeaning portrayals of members of various segments of the population, including women, elderly persons, and uniformed school girls.”

Perfect. And it turns out trading porn is the least of the allegations against Justice McCaffrey….

“Various segments of the population” still gets me. Are “uniformed school girls” a census category that I just missed?

In any event, Justice McCaffrey faces a few more allegations that sound even more serious than a healthy appreciation for Larry Flynt:

Justice McCaffery may have acted in his official capacity to authorize his wife to accept hundreds of thousands of dollars in referral fees from plaintiffs’ firms while she served as Justice McCaffery’s administrative assistant

Ruh-roh. Nothing says functional relationship like funneling improper gifts through a spouse while watching hardcore porn in your chambers. And in case you think that Justice McCaffrey’s case looks bleak now, there’s more:

Finally, in a report submitted by Justice Eakin to the judicial Conduct Board, Justice Eakin has asserted that Justice McCaffery importuned him to urge the Chief Justice to retract a statement of his review of the material received from the Attorney General’s Office, or, alternatively, materials embarrassing to Justice Eakin would be released to the media.

Blackmail! Tremendous.

The court referred the matter to the Judicial Conduct Board, which has 30 days to make a determination whether or not to file formal charges, which it almost certainly will.

Unless they’re also too busy jacking off to uniformed elderly school girls or whatever.

The full opinion, which, as hard as it may be to believe, contains a few more allegations we didn’t even touch, appears on the next page….

Earlier: Supreme Court Justice Involved In ‘Porngate’ Scandal