Health / Wellness

Being A Feeler In A Profession Of Thinkers

The law is full of opportunities to catalyze on empathy and emotion.

depressed lawyerLawyers and law students, at least anecdotally, often seem to be driven, Type-A personalities who might in some ways be at higher risk for addictive behaviors. Perhaps the ways we fit the lawyer “type” has something to do with propensity for mental health issues and addiction. Or maybe sometimes it’s the way we don’t fit in that matters. I certainly felt more stress through the years from the ways I wasn’t a typical lawyer than the ways that I was.  While I never felt particularly stressed from the desire to excel either in law school or as a lawyer, I was stressed because I was miserable for other reasons. I’d chosen an occupation for all the wrong reasons that had no relation to who I was as a person.

I believe part of the issue was that being a lawyer often required putting aside personal feelings to meet client objectives. That was never something at which I excelled. I’m a person who cries at movie trailers and at every Facebook mention of a dog that passes away. I’m the guy who has harbored the guilt of shooting a bird out of a tree with a pellet gun as an adolescent all my life. As an intern with a district attorney’s office, I almost lost it when I helped prosecute a young girl who was being tried for a minor drug violation. I wear my emotions on my sleeve. My decision-making process is often a direct construct of my emotional sense surrounding the issues. In short, I’m a “feeler.”

As part of my exploration of my journey through the legal profession, I decided to take the well-known Myers-Briggs personality test, which is based on the writing of Carl Jung in the early twentieth century. It’s not a perfect tool but can provide some insight into how we process information, complete tasks, and interact with others. Had I taken it at the start of my career, it may not have persuaded me to go into a different profession, but it could have helped me anticipate some of the ways my personality fits (or doesn’t easily fit) a law career.

According to the test, I’m considered an “ISFJ” personality: Introversion, Sensing, Feeling, Judging. How does that compare to other lawyers? Luckily, I’m not the first to ask that question. In 1993, a study was done by attorney and management consultant Larry Richard in which 3,014 lawyers were surveyed on Myers-Briggs personality type. My personality type of ISFJ was relatively rare in the legal profession, accounting for only 4.25 percent of those responding to the survey compared to roughly 14 percent of the general population. Comparing my results to lawyers as a group is interesting.

As a “feeler” already with underlying mental health issues, choosing law was one of the worst decisions I could have made to fit my personality. Mental-health issues combined with an aversion to conflict and criticism for me certainly seemed a volatile combination that often led to dissatisfaction, depression, and triggering behaviors.

While I have no doubt there are “feelers” doing well in the law and who are happy with their career choices, with that personality type and all the baggage I was already carrying, the odds were not good that, without being in recovery, I would succeed. And what happened when I went into recovery? I veered to a profession of feelers: mental-health advocacy. Now I’m happy. To my fellow lawyer “feelers” — the law is full of opportunities to catalyze on empathy and emotion. Not everyone is meant to be a hard-ass. Pivot. Juke. Set your new path. Get healthy doing it. Be happy doing it. Exploring the ways you are a unique individual can certainly help with recovery and career.


Brian Cuban (@bcuban) is The Addicted Lawyer. Brian is the author of the Amazon best-selling book, The Addicted Lawyer: Tales Of The Bar, Booze, Blow & Redemption (affiliate link). A graduate of the University of Pittsburgh School of Law, he somehow made it through as an alcoholic then added cocaine to his résumé as a practicing attorney. He went into recovery April 8, 2007. He left the practice of law and now writes and speaks on recovery topics, not only for the legal profession, but on recovery in general. He can be reached at [email protected].