Morning Docket: 01.25.18

* Grumpy cat should be a little less grumpy after winning $710,000 in a licensing case. [Courthouse News Service] * Remember that judge who gave a Stanford swimmer 6 months for a rape conviction? Yeah, he's poised to get kicked off the bench. [NY Daily News] * Can you get a DUI in an autonomous vehicle? A lot of people aren't familiar with State of Oregon v. The Autobots. [Versus Texas] * Ty Cobb is a lot less eager to meet with Mueller under oath than his client. [New York] * Apparently "AI" is now a verb. That's... awful. [Legal Week] * Your summer associate lunch plans have taken a hit -- Le Bernardin sued over everything from shortchanging employees to sexual harassment. [Le Bernadin] * Your work email is probably in the Dark Web. It's also probably on your firm website, but that doesn't sound as menacing. [National Law Journal] * New York will only do business with ISPs that adhere to net neutrality in a move that many states are expected to copy. I'm sure the states rights-loving politicians who worked tirelessly to kill neutrality will hail this as a triumph of federalism. [New York Law Journal]