Morning Docket: 04.23.15

* Congratulations to Loretta Lynch, who later today should be confirmed as the first African-American woman to serve as attorney general. [CNN] * And congrats to baseball star Barry Bonds, whose obstruction of justice conviction just got overturned by the Ninth Circuit. [How Appealing] * Dewey turned DLA Piper partner John Altorelli, alleged former paramour of Russian spy Anna Chapman, is back in the news -- JP Morgan Chase accuses him of lying about his assets in his pending personal bankruptcy case. [American Lawyer] * The many debaters-turned-lawyers out there might enjoy this look at the college debate career of presidential hopeful Ted Cruz. [New York Times] * A satirical "killing Jews is his jihad" ad can't be kept out of New York mass transit, per Judge John Koeltl (S.D.N.Y.). [ABA Journal] * Retired General David Petraeus is expected to plead guilty later today to a misdemeanor charge of mishandling Paula Broadwell classified materials. [Washington Post] * U.S. Supreme Court justices are getting grumpier, according to interesting research discussed by Paul Barrett. [Bloomberg View via How Appealing] * With the U.S. Supreme Court about to decide the constitutionality of gay-marriage bans, what's next for opponents of marriage equality? [New York Times] * Standing up for "religious freedom" bills, for one thing -- which is what Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal is doing, telling corporations that plan to "bully[]" his state, "Save your breath." [New York Times]