FIFA

Morning Docket: 06.02.15

* McDermott Will & Emery poached six partners from K&L Gates as part of its Dallas office "re-launch." Their poor paralegals: Right now, the lawyers are working in temporary offices, and don't have access to land lines. [WSJ Law Blog] * Dean Paul Mahoney of UVA Law announced he'll be stepping down from his position on June 30, 2016, after eight years of dedicated service to the school. Law students, please lower your collars to a half-pop in light of this news. [UVA Today] * Dewey think these defendants are full of themselves? The former leaders of this failed firm had insane and enviable compensation packages, but that doesn't mean their multimillion-dollar guarantees weren't justified -- or even deserved. [Am Law Daily] * Experts speculate that the Justice Department's case against FIFA could strengthen its global power, but of course, that will hinge on whether Loretta Lynch can get RICO charges to stick for conduct that took place overseas. [DealBook / New York Times] * After months of going back and forth on their urge to merge, Hiscock & Barclay completed its combination with Damon Morey. The new 275-lawyer firm will be known as Barclay Damon, and could possibly become a member of the Am Law 200. [Syracuse.com] * Legal marijuana business need lawyers and bankers, but those willing to advise them are few and far between. If you want to join the green rush and learn how to help these people comply with the law, come to our marijuana law reception later this month. [Forbes]

Non-Sequiturs: 05.29.15

* Out-of-state mistress had insufficient contacts with the state for wife's alienation of affection tort. Hos in different area codes: it's not a saying, it's a legal doctrine. [Legal Profession Blog] * The Orange County D.A.'s office took withholding evidence to a whole new level. Actually, probably more frightening, this behavior probably isn't all that uncommon. [Slate] * Lawyer making six figures lectures law school grads about how they need to take public service jobs. [The Legal Watchdog] * Prince Harry's ex has left Allen & Overy. What's the next career move for Chelsy Davy? DJ. Rich people make the best life decisions. [Legal Cheek] * All the ways that FIFA allegedly hid bribes. When it comes to hiding, I thought soccer would never top an NBCSN contract. [Screamer / Deadspin] * The Dersh talks about becoming a great litigator and discusses where his current legal battle stands. [In the Benches] * Why fight in court if the courts are so unfair? [Katz Justice] * On Tuesday, the Intelligence Squared debate series will tackle marriage equality, debating whether the Equal Protection clause requires states to issue same-sex marriage licenses. There are still tickets available if you wish to attend. [Intelligence Squared] * What will life look like after Earth's next mass extinction event? And will they need lawyers? [What About Clients?]

Soccer, International Criminal Law, and Thucydides

What ancient history teaches us about the FIFA indictments.

Morning Docket: 05.28.15

* As it turns out, Marilyn Mosby, State's Attorney for Baltimore, has been a legal all-star for much of her adult life. Not only did she file charges against police officers in the death of Freddie Gray, but she won a case in front of Judge Judy. Watch the video below. [New York Daily News] * “No one needs more than 18 years in the high stakes and extremely powerful position of Supreme Court justice.” If you're against lifetime terms for SCOTUS justices, you're going to love Fix the Court's new initiative for voluntary term limits. Who'd actually follow through with this? [Legal Times] * The DOJ brought a landmark case against FIFA officials, but there's likely going to be a problem getting those who were charged extradited from Switzerland. Legal experts say it'll be at least six months until we can get them in the U.S. penalty box. [WSJ Law Blog] * Sure, Dewey & LeBoeuf's former chief financial officer may have referred to the firm's "fake income" and hoped for a "clueless auditor," but come on, that doesn't mean that he was involved in anything fraudulent. He's just a really "blunt" kind of guy. [Am Law Daily] * UC law students are thanking Gov. Jerry Brown they're exempt from supplemental tuition increases -- "[they] are paying a ton already for [their] degrees." Good thing legal education is in the toilet, otherwise they'd be paying the fee hikes. [Los Angeles Times] * Comedian Tracy Morgan has settled his personal injury lawsuit against Wal-Mart over the tractor-trailer truck crash he was involved in last summer. The terms of the settlement have not been disclosed, but we imagine someone will leak them online soon. [Reuters] https://youtu.be/f6aN3_hKdwk

Only The American Justice System Could Go After FIFA

U.S.A.! U.S.A.! If we can't beat 'em on the pitch, we'll get them in court.

Morning Docket: 05.27.15

* It's summer associate season in Biglaw, so here are some tips to help you not completely screw up your futures. (But if you do catch someone misbehaving, make sure to send your friends here at ATL a tip.) [MoneyBeat / Wall Street Journal] * Break out the vuvuzelas, because Loretta Lynch just scored herself a gigantic GOOOOAAAALLLL!!!! Several of FIFA's top officials were arrested in Switzerland for extradition to America to face federal corruption charges over years of alleged racketeering and wire fraud. [New York Times] * “Not all the evidence that you hear and see will be riveting." The Dewey & LeBoeuf financial crimes trial may be sexy for Biglaw aficianados, but at least one of the prosecutors on the case had the courtesy to warn jurors they'd be bored. [Am Law Daily] * Which Biglaw firms are the best places for new fathers to work? According to a recent report from Fatherly, a digital parenting resource for men, Arnold & Porter, Alston & Bird, and Baker Donelson all have pretty nice paternity leave policies. [Nooga.com; Fatherly] * At some law firms, working part-time or on a flexible schedule isn't necessarily a career killer for women, but that doesn't change the fact that at other firms, doing so means that "they're no longer on that partnership/management track.”[Crain's Chicago Business] * Daniel Meltzer, Story Professor of Law at Harvard Law School, former Principal Deputy Counsel to President Obama, and federal courts scholar, RIP. [Legal Theory Blog]

Non-Sequiturs: 11.18.14

* We are coming to Chicago, and we’d love to see you at our event on Thursday night — RSVP here. [Above the Law] * Wait, FIFA may be dishonest? Kirkland partner Michael Garcia announces plans to appeal after FIFA releases ethics report on the Russia and Qatar World Cup bidding process that contains “numerous materially incomplete and erroneous representations of the facts and conclusions.” And he should know since he worked on the investigation. [Am Law Daily] * Behold the all-purpose citation! [Lowering the Bar] * Regarding yesterday’s crazy “woman sues the owner of the dog that her dogs killed,” an astute reader notes that a year ago, the Texas Supreme Court limited damages in pet deaths to “animal’s market worth.” So in the interest of reining in damages, the courts gave the victim less incentive to sue than the owner of the perpetrators. Sounds like a great system there. [Dallas Morning News] * The holidays are around the corner. Get that special lawyer some prints of courthouses around the country to spruce up their office. [Courthouses of America] * Wow. California school district argues that 14-year-old girl could legally consent to sex with her teacher because, I mean, come on, we all knew she was a slut. This happened. In 2014. [Slate] * Advice that should go double for lawyers: sometimes you really just need to drop acid to clear your head. [What About Clients?] * Professors who refuse to retire are the worst. [TaxProf Blog]

Non-Sequiturs: 08.15.14

* Suit filed questioning the parentage of Blue Ivy Carter. Plaintiff claims to be the real… mother? Hm. You’d think that would be pretty easy for everyone to remember. [International Business Times] * The Washington D.C.-area NFL team has filed suit to get its trademark back. They think the USPTO are Indian Givers. [DCist] * The ACLU is asking courts to define “freedom of the press” in the wake of Ferguson. I understand their impulse, I just don’t think they’re gonna like the answer. [Fox2Now] * A 71-year-old lawyer allegedly called two escorts over to his house and they asked for more money. Even for rich lawyers it’s the principle of the thing. [South Florida Lawyers] * Sad to see Professor Larry Tribe join the “let’s blame the teachers instead of funding public schools” parade. But now that he’s become a high-profile supporter of ending tenure for those teaching the young, perhaps he’ll renounce his own tenure. Or at least fight to revoke it from all his colleagues. [National Law Journal] * A Colombian lawyer is suing FIFA for $1.3 billion over bad officiating. Of all the things FIFA deserves to get sued over, this isn’t making the list. [Washington Post] * Congratulations to Rob Manfred, a Harvard Law grad formerly of Morgan Lewis, on his promotion to MLB Commissioner. He will continue the proud tradition of keeping us bored all summer long while we wait for football to come back. [New York Times] * New lawsuit says Google kept records of plans to infringe intellectual property… on Post-Its. Unwise. Office supplies are for back-to-school shopping, not writing down wrongful acts. [Valleywag] * If you’re a current 3L or a law grad about to come off a clerkship, NOAA has a job opportunity for you. Imagine how exciting it will be when the next Sharknado happens! [USAJobs via NOAA]

Non-Sequiturs: 08.06.14

* Donald Trump is suing to get his name removed from the Trump Plaza and Trump Taj Mahal in Atlantic City because his reputation is tarnished by tacky façades dedicated to giving off the mere illusion of success. [Bloomberg Businessweek] * Beset by corruption allegations, Governor Cuomo is using funds out of his campaign war chest to fund his defense rather than squandering taxpayer dollars. Ball’s in your court neighboring state governor. [North County Public Radio] * Beau Brindley, a benchslap legend, is now the subject of his very own federal criminal probe after allegedly encouraging a client to lie under oath. A tipster told us last year “this won’t be the last you hear of [Brindley].” How prophetic. [Chicago Sun-Times] * The woman given a forced blow job simulation for the glory of a 7-inch Burger King burger is speaking out. [Copyranter] * The Women’s World Cup is scheduled for next year in Canada, but a number of high-profile players are threatening — with the help of Boies, Schiller & Flexner and Canadian firm Osler, Hoskin & Harcourt — to sue FIFA for discrimination over its plan to subject the women’s tournament to artificial turf. Are you suggesting FIFA is a disastrously flawed organization? Get out. [Fox Sports] * Guess what? Your insurance company isn’t made up of the worst people on the planet. Unless you use this insurance company. Because then, maybe it is. [Gawker] * A Harvard Law grad wanted to install an intercom so he invented a system known as “Nucleus” that does the job for less than $200. [Technical.ly Philly] * If you’re interested in the fun and exciting world of startups, head on out to Legal Tech SF’s Startup Weekend. It’s August 15-17 at Airbnb headquarters. I assume after August 17 the location reverts to the headquarters of some other company. [Legal Tech SF]

Which World Cup Team Is Your Law School?

You can understand a lot about the World Cup when you realize every team is basically a law school.