Sullivan & Cromwell

Exciting news for everyone at the firm. Congratulations!

He's not wrong....

I hope Jones takes some solace in knowing that he may actually be one of the innocent ones.

SBF wants the Biglaw firm treated as part of the prosecution team.

* “This is our third major financial crisis,” said Sullivan’s Mitchell Eitel describing his experience weathering the legal fallout of economic troubles. Remember the 50 years where we didn’t have major bank collapses? Maybe we were all onto something. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Supreme Court to hear more argument about law banning speech about illegal immigration and practically deployed to surveil journalists. [Courthouse News Service]

* “Utah governor: Social media law limiting minors’ access not ‘foolproof.'” I think he meant to say “constitutional.” [Axios]

* Purdue’s online law school seeks permission to send graduates to the bar exam. Because rather than regulate legal education to graduate lawyers who can practice immediately or require a comprehensive exam for any interested potential practitioner, we have BOTH. [Journal Gazette]

* Someone leaked Twitter’s source code online in latest development from clown car central. [Reuters]

* Shearman revenue down 10 percent and partner profits off 17.5 percent. No wonder they were so hot to merge. [American Lawyer]

* New York will take another stab at selecting a Chief Judge. [Law360]

* Google doesn’t think much of the government’s antitrust action. It might want to try a quick Bing search on antitrust law. [Reuters]

* Asking ChatGPT to write a poem about being a law student. [LegalCheek]

* Insiders may find it a little sketchy, but Goodwin coupling layoffs with a big lateral hire may be the norm in a market where the “recession” is only hitting specific groups. [Law.com]

* A deep dive into Sullivan & Cromwell’s cryptoexchange adventure. [Financial Times]

* Elon Musk testifies that publicly stating that he had “funding secured” when he had not, so much, “secured” any “funding” was “the right thing to do.” Juries appreciate a complete lack of remorse! [Law360]

* The Biden administration’s defense of its student loan relief programs arrived. It mostly revolves around the plaintiffs’ lack of standing, which has the benefit of being completely correct and the drawback of a majority of justices who don’t care. [Reuters]

* After yesterday’s southeastern merger news, now Maynard and Nexsen are merging to build a 550-attorney firm. [Daily Report Online]

* Coinbase will have to pay $100M in real people money for anti-money laundering compliance failures. [Law360]

* S&C takes overall deal value crown for 2022, shedding a bit of light on those Kirkland cutbacks we’ve been hearing about [American Lawyer]

* Preparing for a cyber threat is one thing. Getting lawyers to actually comply with your policies is another. [Legaltech News]

* Another story about facial recognition software, race, and mistaken identity. This time a man claims he was falsely arrested because of the software. [Gizmodo]

* In other news, I was on the most recent episode of WGN’s Legal Face-Off discussing a wide range of legal issues from bonuses to the Supreme Court. [WGN]

SBF doesn't pull any punches complaining about Sullivan & Cromwell.

A humble suggestion.

Two new leaders at S&C.

According to the ATL Insider Survey, which practice areas and law firms offer the best (and the worst) hours?

How does a partner focused on finance not keep track of millions?

* Harry Belafonte is suing MLK’s kids to establish ownership of a few documents. Why won’t the King kids jump in de line? [CNN] * Bad news for Charleston Law: South Carolina has decided to pass on taking over the school. To InfiLaw and Beyond! [The State] * Sometimes advertising creates some strange bedfellows. This story brought to you by the U.S. News rankings. [PrawfsBlawg] * School sends in a fake masked gunman to scare kids as part of a lesson. This will end well. [Jezebel] * Maryland’s Attorney General is a terrible backseat driver. Do with that information what you will. [Lowering the Bar] * Sullivan & Cromwell is bringing in Jeffrey Wall, an assistant to the Solicitor General, to be co-head of its appellate practice. [Blog of the Legal Times] * Some advice that you wish someone imparted back in the day. [Legal Cheek] * The government shutdown wasn’t as much about tearing down government as it was about creating a paradoxical dictatorship of freedom. Time to brush up on your Carl Schmitt, y’all. [Concurring Opinions] * The legal issues involved in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. The traffic laws governing flying cars not included. [The Legal Geeks]

Ed. note: In honor of Columbus Day (and Canadian Thanksgiving), Above the Law will be on a reduced publication schedule today. We will be back in full force tomorrow.

* Justice stops for no one, not even a broken Congress. With the end of days approaching quickly for federal courts in terms of funding (or the lack thereof), many judges are lashing out and declaring all their employees essential. [National Law Journal]

* Legal expenses can be especially “painful,” even for the biggest of banks, but sadist firms like Sullivan & Cromwell, Paul Weiss, and WilmerHale are really getting their rocks off on Jamie Dimon’s suffering. [DealBook / New York Times]

* DLA Piper’s future’s so bright it’s got to wear shades — and appoint a new co-managing partner in New York City, its largest office. Congratulations to Richard Hans, you’ve co-made it! [New York Law Journal]

* “It’s not just about me.” Jim Tanner, a Williams & Connolly partner who represents Jeremy Lin, is leaving the firm to start his own sports management business, and he’s taking people with him. [Bloomberg]

* “I have no apologies to make about anything I did.” Steven Donziger of Chevron/Ecuador infamy will be defending himself in court this week in what’s being called a legal cage match. [Wall Street Journal]

* “Touro is asking a judge to declare the school a diploma mill.” Irony alert: Touro wants Novus University Law School, a school supposedly conferring “worthless law degrees,” to be stopped. [New York Post]

* If you think SCOTUS abused its discretion in the early abortion cases, you’re going to love this book (affiliate link), a “cautionary tale” about consequences of decisions like Roe v. Wade. [Wall Street Journal]

Rankings! Here are the top ten law firms in the world by revenue, profits per partner, and attorney headcount.

* A study revealed that almost half of all links in online Supreme Court opinions are dead, but at least internet pranksters like this guy have been given a chance in the spotlight. [New York Times]

* CHECK YOU [BLACKBERRIES] OFTEN, because firms like Shearman & Sterling, McCarthy Tétrault, Skadden Arps, and Torys will advise on the ancient technology’s private sale. [Am Law Daily]

* We hope this IPO isn’t imported from Detroit. Chrysler filed a prospectus with the SEC yesterday with the help of attorneys from Sullivan & Cromwell and Cravath. [DealBook / New York Times]

* Paul Bergrin, more commonly known as the “Baddest Lawyer in the History of Jersey,” was handed a life sentence yesterday. At least he’ll have street cred with his gen pop friends. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

* If you’re still thinking of applying to law school now, you must be the kind of person who needs advice on how to go to college and fill out applications, all at the same time. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

A look at some underlying trends concerning post-Recession summer associate programs.

* Chief Justice John Roberts appointed Second Circuit Judge José A. Cabranes to the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court of Review. Roberts must be happy; few will criticize a moderate. [Washington Post]

* The Department of Justice plans to hire Leslie Caldwell, Morgan Lewis partner and ex-Enron prosecutor, to fill Lanny Breuer’s shoes. Way to leak the news while she’s on vacation. [DealBook / New York Times]

* Tell us again how sequestration isn’t having an impact on the judiciary. Private federal indigent defense attorneys are going to see their already modest rates slashed due to budget cuts. [National Law Journal]

* Sixteen lawyers will receive the New York Law Journal’s Lifetime Achievement Award, and a list like this obviously wouldn’t be complete without the names of some of Biglaw’s best and brightest. Congrats, Rodge! [New York Law Journal]

* Thomas D. Raffaele, the judge who was karate chopped in the throat by a police officer last summer, is now suing over his crushed larynx and similarly squashed constitutional rights. [Courthouse News Service]

* Future gunners, unite! If you’re set on becoming a lawyer, there are things you can do to prepare your law school application, even as a college freshman. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* Here’s something to aspire to for the ongoing law school lawsuits: Career Education Corp., a system of for-profit colleges, will pay $10 million to settle a dispute over its inflated job statistics. [Wall Street Journal]

* Penn State University is starting to issue settlement offers to young men who claim they were sexually abused at the hands of Jerry Sandusky, the school’s former assistant football coach. [Legal Intelligencer]