Biglaw, Constitutional Law, Litigators, Quote of the Day, Technology, Ted Olson

Quote of the Day: Ted Olson’s Got Jokes!

Ted Olson

Normally when I hear the words “legal tech,” I run away. It scares me.

— Famed litigator Theodore B. Olson of Gibson Dunn, commenting on every litigator’s most hated technological development during his keynote presentation at LegalTech New York.

(Continue reading for more entertaining commentary from Ted Olson, after the jump.)

Ted Olson is a really captivating speaker, and it an absolute pleasure to listen to what was essentially his primer on constitutional law. It must be a treat to watch him in action when he argues before the Supreme Court. It was shocking that people kept darting out of the room during his speech like Lat at a nudie bar. No wonder people think lawyers are so rude. Apparently you can’t buy class with Biglaw bonuses.

They likely missed this gem about Chief Justice John Roberts and the Obamacare opinion:

“Roberts’s support for the individual mandate brings to mind the Higgs boson — it can’t be seen, it disappears upon occurrence, and it’s the God particle that controls everything in the universe.”

Some people (coughcough legal tech vendors coughcough) were complaining that Olson’s speech had little to nothing to do with legal technology, but for the lawyers in the audience, it was like a law school-esque nirvana. It was like sitting in on a Con Law class, but with a professor who doesn’t put you to sleep.

Moral of the story: legal tech — or the lack thereof — can be fun, even if it scares the pants off of Ted Olson.

(hidden for your protection)

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