Megan Fox Might Go To Law School

If you see Megan Fox walking around your law school, don't be too surprised.

As legendary crooner Alice Cooper once intoned, “school’s out for summer.” But for some students hanging around campus, they may spy Megan Fox strolling the halls.

After NYLS sent off its students to “go play in traffic” — and yes, that’s actually what their commencement speaker told them to do — the school had to find some way to make some scratch to keep the lights on. Running a law school that only places 42.9 percent of its grads puts a crimp in alumni giving, and even the largess provided by an alum who happens to be the highest paid TV star in the country can’t pay for everything.

The school’s already renting out space to a business school, and now it’s giving over its space to Megan Fox’s next film project, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2.

Admittedly, NYLS has a beautiful building — it looks more like a modern top-flight law school than… well, actual modern top-flight law schools. To borrow from Baudrillard, it’s the hyperreal law school.

Assistant Dean Helena Prigal informed students via email of a mysterious film project coming to the school:

We are excited to announce that Paramount Pictures will use our beautiful school as backdrop for their next major motion picture. Paramount will be filming a few scenes of their film at NYLS from May 28 – June 2. The production company is dedicated to making sure that the student experience at NYLS is not greatly impacted by their presence. A full detailed schedule with dates, times, and locations is below. In order to minimize any disruption to you, the film will shoot only during the overnight hours of 6 p.m.-7 a.m. However, during the day you may notice production staff and teams dressing some of the shared NYLS spaces for overnight filming. During the overnight filming, students may experience limited access to some areas of the school and be asked to use alternate entrances/exits. You will receive additional and updated communications on which areas will have limited access during production.

So how do we know the school is hosting a Megan Fox movie? Well, an eagle-eyed NYLS graduating 3L started spotting a film crew sporting the codename “Half Shell.” Just in case you were holding out hope that Hollywood executives weren’t mind-numbingly uncreative, I direct you to Entourage: The Movie. If that’s not enough, you can check out this website that cracks the codes of upcoming film productions.

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Wow. In the annals of codenames, that’s embarrassingly easy to decipher. If this is how the entertainment industry picks it’s passwords, I’m starting to understand this whole Sony hack thing.

A note of caution, there’s no confirmation that Fox is involved in any of the NYLS scenes, but there’s always hope. If she’s not there, you might at least catch a glimpse of some sewer-dwelling adolescents.

But if look past those graduates without long-term, full-time jobs, there may be some actors dressed like turtles.

Earlier: Commencement Speaker Tells New York Law School Grads To ‘Go Play In Traffic’
The $47 Million Dollar Law Degree: Judge Judy Is America’s Highest-Paid TV Star

(Check out the full email from the dean on the next page…)

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