Lawyer Serves Eviction Notice Upon Overdue Baby

Way to stick it to that womb squatter.

If you’re a lawyer with children who’s been searching for a unique way to announce that you’ve got another one on the way, then you’ve probably seen a bunch of pictures crying babies and toddlers with eviction notices taped to their cribs.

While these “eviction notices” are certainly cute, they stray far from serving as actual legal documents. Young Washington lawyer Jake Kempton of Kempton Legal wanted his eviction claim to be actionable. He was so fed up with his almost newborn — she was already eight days overdue and had overstayed her welcome in his wife’s uterus — that he served the yet-to-be-born infant with a Notice to Quit the Premises. Way to stick it to that womb squatter.

In an interview with Above the Law, Kempton told us that he’d never seen a prior baby eviction notice before. Perhaps he’s not as addicted to Pinterest as we are. Kempton, who opened a solo practice in January with a focus on business, real estate (including landlord/tenant issues, of course), estate planning, and health care law, says he got the idea while he was at church after a few people came up to him and said something to the effect of, “She still hasn’t had the baby?! She needs to evict her!” Kempton told us that he thought to himself, “Hey, why not? My wife could use some humor right now…” Kempton then began eviction proceedings against his baby daughter while she was still in utero.

When we asked Kempton if his child had surrendered the premises yet, he responded in the affirmative, noting that it only took three hours after notice was served for her to vacate his wife’s womb. If only all defendants were so courteous. Pepper Dee Kempton was born at 3:42 p.m. on August 31, 2015. Take a look at this beautiful little baby:

Pepper is the Kemptons’ third child, and their oldest is almost four. He says that “it makes for a crazy house sometimes, but we wouldn’t have it any other way.” Many of Kempton’s colleagues got a kick out of his baby eviction notice, with the picture being shared among lawyers and members of the judiciary alike. Could this be a new niche practice area?

Jake Kempton is open to the idea: “If I could figure out a way to ethically market a ‘baby eviction’ service, I would probably be able to put my kids through college and retire early.”

Congratulations to Jake and Ellisha Kempton and the entire Kempton family on their newborn baby! She’s pretty precious for an evictee, don’t you think?

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